Christian Catholic Mystic Hermit: Correspondence, Vision of Souls, Do Not Become Ensnared in Temporal Nets

 Another correspondence to someone in attempt to explain pitfalls of not to become ensnared nor to remain ensnared in the temporal nets that can occur in various aspects of life, including the temporal and man-created, man-developed aspects of church, including the temporal aspects of the Catholic Church.

The Lord has been progressing me, working on me, expanding me for what is next.  I have been opened up to think and feel and "be" in terms of "Christian".  I have prayed as to why He brought me into the Catholic Church, and there are several reasons.  And now He has taken me through the portal, through the other, yet not without great effect and linkage, but out the temporal attachments and emphases.

I'm praying about what I'm to be "being" next, or even beginning it now. I'm fairly sure I'm to share the many experiences of God I've had in my life, from way back, as a soul who loves God and Christ and the Holy Spirit. There must be some reason for all the visions and locutions, the death experience, and various unusual phenomenon and occurrences, and I think it is to help others maybe realize how very real is God in our lives, in our midsts, as our Creator and All.  I'm thinking in terms of video or documentary style sharing rather than in writing.  

But I'll continue to pray what is His will and desire, and why and what He wants me to do with it all, if anything. But I know it could inspire or help others--not particularly Catholics--but for those mostly who are not Catholic, the Gentiles, so to speak, of which I've always felt I was a Gentile Christian and now transitioning through the temporal church, temporal aspects of Catholic church now,  As it turns out. I'm more deeply Christian, though, and the spiritual of Catholicism provides treasure, and the writings left from the early centuries and those who grasped the spiritual over the centuries are guides; yet the temporalized aspects of Catholicism have been a warning to not get caught in those entangling nets.

I appreciate the Christian mystics and any holy and good persons, of course!  I appreciate all those associated with Christ when on earth, and prior and after, including those around me who are holy and good souls--such as friends and some priests over the years who are very much, holy souls, lovers of God, believers in Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit!  

I don't need persons or protocol to tell me who is holy and who is not; God lets us know in various ways, who are holy and good souls even if they are in process, for all are in process, even the canonized saints were in process. That is why it is nice to point out and award people with honors for doing well and being great examples of following Christ, but it is not necessary for all the emphasis put on it.  Some put much focus on some of these aspects such as saints, rather than on Christ, and the people who have been made into saints through process and ceremonies and label themselves do not want it, any more than Christ wanted the people to make him into their king. 

 Why not look to the "real deal" as the example, and allow the Holy Spirit to be as Jesus said--our Paraclete?  However, it is natural to look to other people and to appreciate the ones who stand out as particularly Christian and as close to Christ as is humanly possible.  These are in all religions and faiths and creeds--godly people.  God is removing me from my narrow limitations that I took on in my desire to fit in, and is helping me to see the "saints" canonized as having themselves flown free of all that, themselves.  They eschewed it.  

But I also accept we people including within various Christian churches including within the Catholic church and also of varying religions are all in different places, as the vision given me years ago of what are souls, showed me. We are all in sameness in form but in various positions in the spectrum of progression toward the Light, and there is no essence of rushing or of judgment; all were progressing and all will come into the Light who are in the universe and that vast trajectory of convoluting, involuting, as if semi-transparent, living rubber cones-- our souls constantly moving within themselves, convoluting while yet constantly progressing toward the Light.

I wish I could paint the various visions with motion added. It would be breathtaking and explain so much. But that was one of the more vast and esoteric of visions, the vision of what is the soul and all our souls in relationship to one another and to God. The other visions were more concrete, images more of temporal earth and personages I'd recognize.  Or such as Mary who appeared and announced herself as Merari, and was of the image and likeness of people of Sumatra.  Mary is universal Theotokos.

I consider a "canonically approved hermit" who continues bleating about canon law 603 and of canonically approved hermits and about every aspect imaginable of canon law 603 and this and that persons in whatever judgment makes of their being true to CL603 or not, or who is or is not to be a Catholic hermit approved or not by the one's  estimation. On occasion this "canonical hermit" gets onto temporal societal topics, and from personal, temporal viewpoint opines upon what in self opinion is right or wrong and broaching into what self deems spiritual immorality and sin, degrading those who fall into the sin category and heralding those who are in agreement with how this person views matters.  

I had been months away but took a look at what the one writes as an "approved by a bishop," canonical Catholic hermit, wearing religious garment of some past century's conception--similar to what Francis of Assisi wore, perhaps.  I was able to see that nothing had changed except I was not the targeted obsession any longer. I had stopped writing labeled as a "Catholic hermit" (of which I am if dwelling in the temporal protocols historically established traditionally by the Catholic Church centuries ago as a result of those in the Church who lived the hermit life and identified then if by anything, as "Christians."  They were "Catholics" in that there was no Protestant reformation. There have been hermits in other world religions, of course, before there were Christian hermits and before the Catholic hermit designation or the distinguishing of "Catholic" became pronounced due to development of Protestantism.

But I asked myself again, after seeing that even though I was no longer the target, the topics remain focused on a canon law and whatever born out of that or from being "approved" thereof:  Is that the fruit of years of being a Catholic, the fruit of Catholic faith, of having Catholic approval to a label of a way of life that is but one of many forms of vocation?  

We are not God, and temporal Catholic regimen is such a temptation to certain personality types, and feeds on those who love external locus of control, and any one of us can become stuck, ensnared in the temporal Catholic nets.  And I have been tempted to be stuck, myself, and enmeshed myself in much of the temporal regimen in order to fulfill my human and pathetic need to be accepted, to fit in, and desire for something to fulfill an ideal. But the Catholic church is not God. It is made up of the Body of Christ and Christ as the Head.  It is also a means on earth, a help, a process to  help us learn much, be as supporters of one another, to come closer to God.  The church helps progress us and provides the penultimate gathering of two or more together in prayer and worship. That is, if we do not get caught, or at least not caught for long, in the temporal entanglements of the regimen that humans created, but the bulk of which Christ did not create nor seem to intend if one studies His Living Word.  

I find that the earliest centuries of Christianity and the early Church are very helpful in reading what the holy Christian "catholic" people wrote, the Christians of the one Church despite how humans quite soon began to re-interpret and create other than what Jesus taught and lived.  The great writings of holy people of the early Church is one reason God brought me into the contemporary Catholic church--to learn!  As a Protestant, so much was never broached.  

I also feel that God wanted me to get to know the Christian mystics, for they are all but missing in the Protestant churches. I had no conscious clue of them, prior.  When I read the first book written about seven of them--not calling them by "saint" but as women who had lived their mystical lives, they included Simone Weil [did not become member of Catholic church] and Rose Ferron, and of course Julian of Norwich, Catherine of Siena, Teresa of Avila, and two others--for the first time I found people I could relate with, people like me. Catholicism opened up so many, long before Protestant Reformation, who I could read about, get to know as if personal friends-- read their own words in writings extant.  But I also read how they were mistreated, many of them, and used for the purposes the temporal church and people not behaving so well as Christians, seemed to want.  

These mystics did much good, of course, as they were good and holy humans, touched by the Holy Spirit.  They had a mission and purpose such as we all have, but they found theirs in clear and defined ways and fulfilled them as best they could or knew how, regardless if Catholic or not. It is said Simone Weil was close to being Catholic but did not out of deference to her Jewish roots.  The women in the first book I read, not yet a Catholic myself, really did more outside the grasp of the temporal Catholic church, yet the Church claimed them and promoted, such as Teresa of Avila and Catherine of Siena, who belonged more to God than to church.  But it was through her being allowed to found the Discalced Carmelites, that Teresa had the freedom to be more on her own path and of helping others into the spiritual life, rather than the temporal legalisms and orientation, such as the one I mention above and many others in the temporal aspects of Church continue with and in. 

It is a good example of how I became caught up or even thought perhaps God wanted to use me to try to break through to the person via my blog posts which responded and reacted to this person's temporal emphasis on requirements and regulations--while I was trying to shine light on the spiritual and mystical realities.  I was so foolish to get caught in that snare of a debate.  It is as old as he devil.

Writing of God, JesusChrist, the Holy Spirit and how our lives daily and nightly are guided and led as we are in Him and He is in us, maybe seems not as easy as writing about people who have lived and died and of which much is written.  That is why I find His Living Word and God, Jesus, and Holy Spirit so fascinating and REAL, as they are REAL and inside us, and we are inside God.   

What is love, and where does love reside in us? Where does love reside in God?  Is it love that motivates, such as my apologizing to neighbor man for my tenseness, when God needed me to also face his weakness and temporal greed. None of that incident  matters now, for God moved me on from seeing the weasel-type behavior.  We are all animals, of sorts, if we stay in that aspect, but we are created by God to rise beyond through, with, and in Christ, with the empowering love of the Holy Spirit, as God wants of us all.  It's all a marvel, really, the reality of God in us and us In God.

I'm pondering Heaven today, and the Gospel gives Jesus' parables of what is Heaven.  And I'm pondering, also, why He spoke in parables, for spiritual reality can be too much for most humans to grasp.  That is why dreams and visions are often metaphoric and images that represent or explain are clues, so to speak, to the truth and reality. Probably the closest to actual image of the soul was a vision I was given years ago, of what is and are our souls and how our souls progress.  The vision was quite simple but in vast expanse, out in the universe, and each soul shown as a cone-shaped unit which involuted over and over while at the same time steadily progressing toward an immense, centrifugal light. 

All these cone-shaped, viscous-type, alive yet all the same visually, rubbery-like and nebulous--souls--kept turning inside out repeatedly while at the same time,concurrently, moving forward, advancing silently--millions of them all individual in their position of progression but all the same in appearance and this involuting motion, advancing simultaneously toward the center of the universe of all universes, from which came the immense and drawing-to-Itself Light.  

I was told without words, this is how our souls grow and progress, never static, never standing still, none in the exact same spot or location in the progression, but always processing in multitudinous soul-procession, toward the great Light. And all around as if in the cosmos, all these cone-shaped, viable, rubbery, nebulous souls are in the billions, involuting while at the same time progressing all toward a center point in the  toward the great Light.  (I realize I'm repeating the description that is not easy to describe, and wish I had the skills to create a moving visual using internet technology to demonstrate the incredible, awe-some sight of souls in process of living and growing and progressing toward God, never ceasing, always going forward to the center of God the Creator and Source of All Energy and Beingness and Love.)

I notice that Jesus accomplished what the prophets before Him tried to teach and explain, to show glimpses of what they were shown and were told.  God needed to have Himself come as one of us, as His Son to be among us and teach and show and try to explain and exemplify what the prophets could not fully do.  So in part, Jesus through use of parables was teaching and announcing what had lain hidden--the spiritual, mystical realities as well as practical and perfect instruction on how we are to live and love among one another.  He also taught and exemplified to us how we are in God and God is in us, and of the importance of living God's law of love, the greatest of all laws and commandments.  Love God above all things and love others and ourselves as God loves, as we are in God and He is in us.  Jesus was announcing, living, teaching, exemplifying these truths that have been from the beginning of creation.  Our souls are spiritual.  Love transcends the temporal.

Here's the Gospel of Mathew, 13: 31-35, in which Jesus teaches and speaks of the kingdom of heaven, and all spoken to the crowds in parables:

"Jesus proposed a parable to the crowds. 'The kingdom of heaven is like a mustard seed that a person took and sowed in a field.  It is the smallest of the seeds, yet when full-grown it is the largest of plants.  it becomes a large bush, and the birds of the sky come and dwell in its branches.'

"He spoke to them another parable.  'The kingdom of heaven is like yeast that a woman took and mixed with three measures of wheat flour until the whole batch was leavened.'

"All these things Jesus spoke to the crowds in parables. He spoke to them only in parables to fulfill what had been said through the prophet: 'I will open my mouth in parables, I will announce what has lain hidden from the foundation of the world.'" 

Love in His Love, and God bless His Real Presence in you!

Catholic Hermit into God's Hermit: A Lovely, Holy Closing

Happened upon this quote from my Confirmation name saint, Sister Josefa Menendez.  She died on December 29, 1923 in Poitiers, France, in convent (Sacred Heart).  The diocese opened the cause for sainthood, to be a Servant of God, on November 30, 1948.  She was a mystic and victim soul, and is the first that a parish priest whom the Lord told me in locution I was to go.  He opted for private instruction for me; his choice.  

He is the priest who said I'd come to the right place, that this was where I belong, that the Church is "filled with mystics" as he swept his arm in the direction of the parish church, as we met in his rectory office.  He was excited having read some of my writings and insisted on my sharing various spiritual experiences and declared I am a mystic and a victim soul--news to me....  He explained some what is a victim soul, but then left briefly and came back with a book he asked me to read, The Way of Divine Love--biography of Sr. Josefa Menendez.  

Even Josefa's photo on the inside of the book was familiar to me from an encounter with someone--too much to explain.  But reading of her life and the messages to her from Jesus and Mary, her sufferings, her feeling different and not really fitting in for various reasons including her being Spanish but transferred to French convent of which she did not know the language.  Her mystical life and the stigmata further separated her from the others in essence, but the superior insisted on her being more removed physically, as well.  

I obviously bonded with Josefa Menendez; and that is why the date of my hermit profession occurred on the evening of Dec. 29, 2000, and why I chose her rather than St. Teresa of Avila with whom I'm deeply attached, also, as she spoke through me in a doctoral psychology class in San Diego, CA, one Saturday in May 1988.  That is another experience of which I did not begin to get into with the two emails to the bishop nor the two to the parish priest.  

This morning when I came upon this quote from Josefa, one of the locutions from Jesus to her, I found to be beautiful and better and best for a more holy concluding post on this Catholic Hermit blog site.

"It is My intention, also, to show souls that I never refuse grace, even to those who are guilty of grave sin; nor do I separate them from the good souls whom I love with predilection.  I keep them all in My Heart, that all may receive the help needed for their state of soul."  ~Jesus to Sr. Josefa Menendez

For much of this morning, given the pain is high level and burning type, I have had to rest but have wondered and asked the Lord what He wills next, and also have asked myself and the Lord, "What has happened to the goodness and kindness of the soul, to the expectant hope in God and delight in the unexpected that awaited  over 25 years ago, when younger and freshly entering into Christ's Holy Catholic Church?  I've prayed for my innate goodness to be prevalent, and am already receiving that anticipation of much good in God to open up in this next phase that He has in store.

I also came across, unexpectedly, the following letter written by another victim soul and priest saint of whom that first priest who privately instructed me and chose a most private Confirmation, which was for the best as it turned out due to yet another rare mystical experience that occurred.  Padre Pio, now Saint Pio of Pietrelcina, caught my mind and heart and guided me mystically, at one point in a waking vision telling me:  Silence and Penance!  

Padre Pio (not then canonized) in the second year of my Catholic life warned me of the tricks of the devil, in a dream, and I did not heed his warnings and showings, and fell miserably into a trap of the devil.  Yes, the Lord gave me the strength to get out of the trap, but not without much struggle.  Yet, that victory which took a few months of battle, proved to be pivotal in securing a turning point at that juncture point!  I love Padre Pio!  And I'm praying all the more that He will intercede for me and pick up the training of my soul at this time of major transition.  I promise to try to heed this saint's lessons and instructions to the best of my imperfect, human ability.

"God's spirit is a spirit of peace; even after our most serious failings he makes us feel a sorrow that is peaceful, humble, and confident, precisely because of His mercy.  The spirit of evil, on the other hand, agitates, irritates, and makes us feel a sort of anger at ourselves when we have failed.  Yet it falls very much to ourselves to practice charity in the first place.  So when you are bothered by certain thoughts, the agitation never comes from God but from the devil, since God, being a spirit of peace, brings you serenity."  ~St. Pio of Pietrelcina, Letter 549

Padre Pio, I learned from reading several books on his life as well as what volumes of his letters thus far translated into English, passed from this earth on September 23, 1968.  My beloved maternal grandmother passed on October 19 of that very year.  I had no knowledge of Padre Pio nor any saints of the Catholic Church at the time, a senior in high school, and having been reared a devout Protestant of Methodist denomination.  Yet now, each year for the past 20 years, I have renewed my vow of consecration of suffering, as a victim soul of the Sacred Heart of Jesus, and in recent years on Sept. 23--Padre Pio's passing from earth anniversary date.

How would I ever have known in 1968 that 27 years later I would be confirmed a Catholic, would realize that the strange inner life I experienced all my life that I was a mystic and also a victim soul--and that I would learn of Sr. Josefa Menendez and Padre Pio and so love them, count on them in loving friendship and needful of their holy instruction and mentorship?  

Thus I have been praying, also, asking these saints, victim souls, and mystics to be guides yet again, more fully, since I've been so distracted for a long time, in the trials and mishaps and lessons learned in the temporal Catholic world.  Now that there is this conclusion of a major phase and awaiting what it next, there is an eager anticipation once again, a return of that sense of freshness and tremendous hope in God and faith greater than what my distractions and the exhaustion of so much sufferings of various types has seemingly allowed to break through in my mind, heart, and soul!

Thank you, dear readers, for the years you've been following off and on or consistently, my sharing of the spiritual journey of a consecrated (I realize consecrated to Christ) Catholic and hermit (not rightfully a Catholic hermit given the standardized and normative establishment now of CL603 for recognizing through canonical approval of diocese hermits.  Please pray for me, and I promise my prayers for each and all of you!  

Above all:  Praise God from Whom all blessings flow, and God bless His Real Presence in us!

Catholic Hermit: Enlightenment; Forgiveness

I'm on the second of three days--which will flow (and glow) through today's Feast of Epiphany celebrated in the United States and some other countries, rather than on the actual 12th day after Christmas: Epiphany, January 6.  

Yesterday I waited but managed to stand the 40 minutes (shorter than the norm!) awaiting my turn for Sacramental Reconciliation, or Confession.  I finally was able to verbally mention the hurt I'd caused the friend from childhood, and also any others I have hurt without, of course, intending to.  I mentioned the adult children, and what all and ever they feel offense and hurt, or even some type of anger that their childhoods and into adult lives, they had a pained and suffering single parent, in addition to my many flaws and foibles.

In the 3 minutes or so available (the confession line had grown while we had waited for the 3:30 p.m. confession time to arrive, so the penitents know or will be told that we need to be prepared--a good thing for a parish of over 11,000 members), I mentioned the insight regarding my not needing "friends"--to which the priest immediately said he politely disagreed.  But I said wait--there is an insight I've had--an epiphany--that I'd like you to hear.  

I explained (quickly!) that rather than "friends" and "friendships", what I have and must broaden in scope, is:  loves.  The priest saw the point, the reality of this.  I mentioned if I am given the grace to love, and desire to love to the fourth degree of love which St. Bernard describes, then I will love all souls as beloved created souls of God.  

And I must not expect love in return from people on earth--to which the priest agreed that at best, we are mostly incomplete and what love we might offer is likely partial or broken.  Yes!  But I added that we do not need to be loved by those around us when we realize that God loves us perfectly, and that those souls on the other side who are in God or progression to union with God, in their far greater grasp of love of God in Himself, love us.

Part of my confession pertained to my wrong and selfishness of expecting others to be able to love--to forgive, and to love in return.  And that I can understand now, why this is not for me to expect or even, really, to desire.  God's love is what my mind, heart, and soul truly desires; His love is what we all desire--and God's love is what will fulfill the emptiness.  For I also was able to rapidly mention that morning's Mass Gospel reading of the emptying out of the demons, the bad, the negative--and risk--and here the priest completed the sentence with, "the seven more demons coming in to fill the space."

So he suggested for the next three days, that I pray for the broken relationships--the persons I've hurt or the ones that were best or time to free from personal relationships including myself, for I mentioned that in many cases, others may need to be freed from what negative I represent or am in their lives.  It was all so humbling.  I told him that is excellent penance, as I can put my love of all others--the infinite "loves" I have been given by God's love--to purpose and practice.  

I even mentioned that there is this hermit lady in another state and diocese, who has had difficulty accepting my anonymous blog and has negative--to say the least, but that I have come to feel pity for her, and that I have come to love her,  and will very much have her on the focused prayers of the negatives, the broken, the wounded. (I did not say anything more, not that the person is obsessed and bullying for over 11 years, broke two penal codes in doxxing and slander.  But the priest's reaction was that of open-eyed amazement, then a combination smile of disbelief plus the type of amusement I've come to have in the inane situation. He only exclaimed, while half-laughing at the preposterous irony of it:  REALLY?!!!"  Yes.  And I think this lady hermit will be my buddy for life and all eternity.)

Marvelous how the Holy Spirit can stretch 3-4 minutes to include even my parting request of the priest:  Could he please be thinking of any priest or monk with whom I could speak with on occasion, or write to with questions or to receive feedback as to my spiritual life and hermit vocation....  Immediately he was nodding but also said, "I have one."  I did not grasp the statement, so I continued, "...just some guidance and someone who'd be good with hermit, mystic--but grounded." The priest simply repeated, but more emphatically:  "Already have one!  Have one in mind."

I'd scheduled an appointment awhile ago, which is upcoming in ten days, unless a funeral Mass precludes it; I'm figuring perhaps then, the priest will let me know the person he has in mind and how I may make contact.  

All is well, and all shall be well.  I'm forgiven by God; I've also had an epiphany regarding my "loves", and I'm busy praying in my three-days of focused prayers for quite a list of people known and many unknown, whom I've hurt, disappointed, offended, expected love in return, or have needed to free or be freed from.  I'm praising God for the Epiphany gift!  And the priest in what was no more than four minutes' temporal time, helped me immensely in his counsel regarding the negative relationships that out grow their purpose or good.  But the persons remain loves, of course, and I pray for them--without expecting anything from them.

Of course I've already had a couple tests to the epiphany as well as my knowing it was time to expunge a negative situation and relationship.  The person is in denial and let it be known will not be doing what is morally right.  I researched the illegalities of what has been perpetuated over several years, and I will not interject further nor respond even if asked advice.  I've answered the requests, plus with advice also from a professional advisor.  There may be some other tough freeings to be made; but I yet will always love and consider all souls my "loves."  

Perhaps it was the standing, the driving yesterday, but today have been in bed all day:  pain high and am fatigued from it.  After confession, since in area of the church, I drove to the pharmacy where another prescription was called in by the pain doctor's nurse--a new chemical that is supposed to help with intestinal issue.  I stood in line a long time--lovely conversation with a woman, also waiting--and learned from the pharmacist that this medication is even more costly for half the amount of pills than the previous prescription!  I was drawn to some Evening Primrose Oil on the store shelf; the price was minimal.  When I returned to the hermitage, I Googled this herbal; yes, it is supposed to be helpful to intestinal issues.  Worth a try, isn't it?

A phone call from text from a "loved soul" today.  I had texted back that her husband's Epiphany birthday is quite special and with graces for him.  Later I received a call.  Two questions:  one is what do I mean that Epiphany birthday is special, and what exactly is Epiphany; and also, why is it some people live so long, and suffer for a couple years or more before they die in drawn out deaths of the very elderly.  I was pleased to discuss these questions and topics.  I pray the answers were helpful and of the Holy Spirit's inspiration.  The caller seemed interested, intrigued, and satisfied.  We are all in this life together--in soul school to learn what it is we are to learn, and to love, to learn to love.

It's glorious to be "shriven"!  And the enlightenment on "loves" and God's love for us, and our love of God in Himself and thus in His love, to love all souls--breakthrough for this nothing consecrated Catholic hermit.

God bless His Real Presence in us!

Catholic Hermit: Breakthroughs

Praise God Almighty!  Dr. H. understands.  I explained to him when he called this morning, that as much as clinical hypnotherapy is powerfully useful in helping people with all types of problems, just one experience of the numinous of the Holy Spirit, or being plugged into God with all prongs in the socket or even some--the experience and effect supersedes by mega multiples anything that hypnotherapy achieves.

He put it like this, that clinical hypnotherapy and psychotherapy benefit those with secular lives.  I pointed out that he and I know that there can also be people who are religious and belong to churches who are more inclined temporally than spiritually.  We are all in progression, our souls in progression.  But at least he thoroughly understands, and I said I have no issues with concerns about the healing process in my spine.

He gets it when I say that God has it all handled in the way and time and degree and amount He chooses for me.  I also explained (since we've not been in such frequent phone contact as this in three decades) that God knows me, and He knows that I can get exuberant over various creative endeavors--good, yes, but not necessarily what He wants.  And all the more, now, temporal time plays a part in what God wills of me, wants of me, in fulfilling the mission He has for me while on earth.

I told him briefly of the powerful experience of the Holy Spirit 24 years ago last night when I was confirmed a Catholic.  I will not share it here, now; I might at some point, perhaps if I write something other of my conversion experience.  A book, not super long, has been suggested for that topic.  But I continue in this period of post surgery recovery and of dealing with my and others trying to grapple with just how slow and how limiting is the healing and the bodily movement.

But this is all of God's will and choosing.  He knows how to deal with me, and I get excited and am pleased in the knowing and "getting it" of God's using even the set back now, from having over done it getting up 8 times two days in a row and of lifting that toilet seat apparatus that weighs 10-12 lbs.

As my angel or some heavenly saint or the Holy Spirit spoke to me a week or so ago:  Pain is not the enemy.  Suffering is not the enemy.  It is opportunity.

God does not view pain and suffering as we do.  But so many of us do not grasp the good of suffering, the opportunities that come from suffering, pain, and limitations.  God utilizes suffering as a means of progressing our souls.  Dr. H. got that, too.  He said so if not for A, B, C, D, happening, we'd not know about or be opened to E, F, G, H that can occur and happen.  

The opportunity that pain and suffering provides is that very opening to new "life" that Jesus mentions in the Scripture of the seed that falls to the ground, is crushed, so that new life can begin.  This is the on-going, holy metamorphoses of body, mind, heart, and soul.  We are being honed to God's will, those of us who desire and of whom God desires for this or that purpose.

Even this painful but hopefully brief physical set back in my post op healing is a gift from God, making Himself yet more clear in telling me He is funneling me into more specialization, into His desire to use me all the more in writing and prayer, in building upon and putting focus into the religious and spiritual life.

Dr. H. said he thinks I'm more the life of a monk than a hermit.  He still has some of the usual misunderstood images of what is a hermit.  I explained that a consecrated Catholic hermit is like a monk except without other monks all about.  I think that helped him get a more accurate mind view.  Yet I said that is part of what I am going through currently, in that I'm balking in this time of transition.  I had enjoyed the physical and creative activity of constructing and renovating from old to updated and new in dwellings.  I had enjoyed vast gardening projects, delighting in the beauty of all from soil to leaves, from roots to blooms.  I had come to be in contemplative prayer while doing manual labor.

But God is narrowing the path, so to speak.  Or he is more, rather, trimming me, removing clay from my form both inner and outer, to fit me into the path that has increasingly narrowed as is necessary for those who desire union with the Holy Trinity, through, with, in His Real Presence:  Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.

Dr. H. still suggests that in a year or year and a half, when the spine healing is physically complete, we do not know but that God might have it be that I can still do far more in physical movement and tasks than what any occupational or physical therapist could imagine or surmise. 

My sense from within on this is, of course God could provide the healing means that could take me beyond the temporal, physical limitations that the medical professionals think possible.  But I know from how God has dealt with me all my life, and before that if I trust Scripture pointing out He knows us from before, when He knit us in our mother's womb.  And I do trust Scripture, the Living Word of God. 

My sense is that God is asking me to relinquish the temporal things and activities that keep me a generalist rather than a specialist, even within my specialized vocation as a consecrated Catholic hermit.  Dr. H. is a specialist in clinical psychology and within that field is a specialist in certain aspects of human problems, and within that has a specialization of clinical hypnotherapy and also of the paranormal and of spirituality.

The Lord wants me to narrow down and into the specialization of the spiritual life in various aspects that have been shown me over the years, by the Holy Spirit, in ways that many people are not shown, but that they could grasp and be opened to.  My specialization is within the Roman Catholic Church, in mystical theology, and within the eremitic vocation of the consecrated life of the Church.  My specialization is in prayer, in love of the Most Holy Trinity, of His Real Presence.  My main mode of expressing and helping through the specialization is through medium of of words, of writing and somewhat of speaking.

And this goes for my life of prayer, of communication with God.  It is always a two-or-more-way communication involving words and wordlessness, images and non-images, sounds and silence, tangibles and intangibles.

Today I will strive anew to delve into lectio divina and other prayerful and religious reading.  I will also continue in prayer--mostly wordless prayer that includes pain as prayer.  I will try to get up and walk with the walker 6 or more times today.  I will not think much about the future but accept and am fine with reality of moving on from this hermitage in a year after the slow, recovery transition of this surgery, if I'm even on this earth then.  

Manual labor is being trimmed off; religious and spiritual life is being focused.  Increasing union with God is the opportunity that gloriously evolves from pain and suffering and frees us from ourselves and that which distracts us from God Is Love.

God bless His Real Presence in us!  Let us love God above all things and others as ourselves.  Love heals!

Catholic Hermit: Withdrawing to a Deserted Place

Today's Gospel gives the reaction of Jesus to the news that his cousin, St. John the Baptist, died from decapitation.  John had been imprisoned by Herod for having spoken out against Herod's marrying his brother's wife.  It was actually the wife (a true pawn of the devil by her reaction to John's speaking truth, and then her hideous actions) who wanted John's head cut off.  

There are many fascinating facets to this real-life situation; but the point I'm considering this morning is that Jesus reacted to the terrible news by withdrawing "in a boat to a deserted place by himself" (Matthew 14:13).

Mostly we consider the verses following--that the people tracked Him down, followed after, wanted Him to heal them, speak to them.  He took pity on the crowds, 5000 approximately, and what ensued was not only His speaking and healing but providing them with dinner known as the Miracle of the Loaves and Fishes.  It is a "type" for the Last Supper, and for the celebration of Mass, in many ways, especially with the Eucharist--feeding us yet today with His Body and Blood.

However, I am struck by Jesus' reaction to bad news, heinous actions that would have cut to the core of His human emotions.  He withdrew, by Himself, to a deserted place.  Sometimes we do best to be alone, and when alone, we are alone with God: Solus Deus!

Yet people sought Him out.  They wanted conversation and miracles that would benefit them temporally, such as healing or even just to have the amazement of some fantastic feat that defies the very laws of nature.

I am fascinated by people seeking out others.  I suppose it comes from a couple of phone calls over the weekend that left me pondering, and not in a satisfied way but in a jagged way, causing me unrest until alone with God, the insights came for better understanding.

It has to do with two people who called and who increasingly have not called for what I can offer them.  I know they are concerned, but they are concerned about many things that none of us really has much or any control over, especially not them.  (One is 93 and the other nearly 68 but physically limited from letting a health condition go untended.)

Unless they call seeking out what I can offer, such as the one sometimes has family or other issues to talk over, or asks for prayers for a medical procedure, and the other to  discuss her health issues or living circumstances in a retirement facility, they then want to know what progress I've made here.  And, of course, the temporal progress is next to nothing, and the hindrances are bounteous.  

So I answer with truth.  And then I turn all to the spiritual lessons being learned, such as this past couple of weeks being reminded of and taught much about spiritual combat, right down to doing the God-pivot!  When I mention the obstacles that I must endure and deal with, the callers become frustrated.  When I turn all to God in conversation, and joyfully share the lessons and how God is handling the soul's growth--there is progress in that!--the one caller gives a negative "mmmph" and the other rushes to cut off the phone call:  Have to go now!

Neither call leaves a nothing consecrated Catholic hermit uplifted.  Whether or not in the midst of a gnarly pain siege, "mattressed" with stuff piled all around and nothing but work to be done that cannot be done, or if the calls occur when I am attempting to deal with the hindrances and mounds of workload that will take some of Jesus' miracles to overcome--I am not uplifted by the calls, nor am I utilized with what the only good I have to offer them:  the spiritual of God, the lessons and insights, the glory of how He teaches us in the Order of the Present Moment how to endure, to love, to keep faith.

I am very much in a deserted place, brought here not realizing how deserted, for it is deserted by God's magnanimity of purpose in honing my hermit vocation and teaching my soul, preparing it for better fulfillment of my mission as well as for my earthly death and transition to Consummation: Divine Union.  Heaven.

The Stairway to Heaven now is like the ladder in this hermitage, leading to the second floor without railing or treads other than narrow metal ladder rungs, and the ladder on quite a slanted angle due to part of the stair framing in underneath where the laundry area is.  That is something--a type of cleansing with water beneath the stairway--to consider.  The Stairway to Heaven extends over a place of cleansing beneath, undergirding--flowing through us--the need for repentance each step of the way.

I wonder if the people who tracked down Jesus when he withdrew to reflect upon and nurse the deep wounds of agony the news of his cousin-precursor's beheading would cause in His Heart and Mind--I wonder if they listened to what He had to tell them, listened to what He wanted to share of lessons and insights of God?  Or did they just want temporal talk, sweet-talk, small talk?  Did they want the truth--or platitudes?

After the two phone calls this weekend, being stuck in a cistern of pain, I had time to reflect and examine why it was that the calls left me more fatigued and disconnected, disused, dejected.  (The second call was cut off when another call came in that the caller rightfully needed to answer, which was fine, but no call back later--again, fine as it turns out.)  Yes, I had time to ponder, to ask the Lord about it all, and to listen for answers.

Into the thoughts came St. Charbel Maklouf.  I recall reading and also watching a video on YouTube of his life--hermit mystic saint of Lebanon.  Feast day recent: July 24.  He had been in the monastery awhile when his mother came to see him.  The superior sent a monk to inform Charbel; he refused to see his mother.  In the video she is depicted as weeping at the door to his cell; this probably is not the case, but it does dramatize his reaction on the other side of the door.  The mother weeps while the saint struggles mightily with emotion, but refuses to open the door nor to speak.

Also into the thoughts came another mystic hermit, St. Seraphim of Sarov.  I had read that he had been a hermit awhile when his brothers came, hoping to see him one time before any of them would become old and not see each other again.  Seraphim refused to see his brothers.

I recall telling my spiritual father of these instances from my reading.  My spiritual (director) father, a  diocese priest of many years, said he felt that too harsh.  But, I interjected, they are saints, so the Church must not have felt it disqualifying.  And they grew in holiness and were given graces necessary to fulfill their God-willed missions.

So I'm getting a different perspective for those with religious vocations: holy orders, religious orders, eremitic, virgin, widow, societies of the faithful.  Especially if one is born a mystic plus with a religious vocation, and all other temporal obligations fulfilled--of course the focus should be on turning from the world to that which is above.  The spiritual life in Christ is the purpose, full-time, all the time, within, without, here, there, everywhere.

I can better understand the perspective and lesson Jesus was exemplifying when his mother and brethren came to where he was teaching to a gathering in a home.  Someone came to Him and said your mother and brothers have come and wish to see you and speak with you.  Jesus refused.  He instead proclaimed:  Who are my mother and my brethren?  They are those who hear the Word of God and act on it.

Peace returned within my thoughts despite the havoc the physical pain continued to wreak on body, mind, and emotions.  (It does get horrifically intense, does high-level pain, over and over, never without pain, always another pain siege to come until this body is "deader 'n a doornail," as my late dad would aphoristically say.)

What do my relatives think when they call a mystic who is also a consecrated Catholic hermit?  Do they expect chit chat and talk with no message, no insight from God, no Jesus nor Christian lesson?  If they ask what progress, is not spiritual progress good enough--interesting enough--especially when it is always applicable to their own lives?

When they repeatedly reject the mention even if an insight helpful to some situation they are dealing with, of which they have called me to ask for assistance--what then?  So I can see that the Lord allows the passage of time and growth in relationships, and it is my own clinging, in a way, to the comforts of the temporal family relationships, when the Lord keeps bringing me plenty of souls who desire spiritual discussion, insights, lessons, as well as who do not turn away, cut off, with what I am to be about in my vocation.

Yes, I have explained as best I can what is a mystic, for they have wondered at times; and they know I am a Catholic now, and also that I professed my vows nearly 16 years ago. (Although I don't know if they are aware of how many years or what all that means--but know I am a Catholic hermit very much from the time period I was in the hermit community, briefly wore a habit, and had a religious name, of which I still have but do not use, for the name by which God calls me, my heavenly name, is far more special and unknown to those on this side of the veil....)

Have withdrawn to a deserted place, not by boat but by moving truck, and very much by myself.

Those who come seek me out, track me down, do so via email or phone, or the most rare visit.  What they come for is up to them, but what they will take away is also up to them.  What is up to me is to be true to my spiritual calling, my mission, and to do with what I am called to do as a consecrated Catholic hermit and what mystics "do", how mystics think and feel and are.   

Love God above all things and others as Jesus loves us.  Pray for one another, suffer with Christ on whatever crosses life sets before us to pick up and carry.  And live out my eremitic vows and profession, and be the mystic that God created me to be, which to some seems extreme or strange, but to me is just how it is and has been and will be.

I will let those who do not want what is my duty to God and the Church to offer, what is my innate reality and essence to be--let them not approach unless they desire to receive what it is the Lord gives me to give to them.  Otherwise, let them walk away and deal with their vocations in life, which are different than mine.  For those who stuck around for the dinner Jesus provided, and for those of us who read about it and ponder the meaning, we have gained something most special.

What if Jesus had not withdrawn to a deserted place that day?  What if St. Charbel and St. Seraphim and a slew of other mystics and hermits and consecrated and ordained religious wavered in their spiritual work, their religious vocations?  What good would it be for others or for themselves, then?

As the priest said somewhere in the midst of the ecstasy during Mass, this simple take-away:  Let it go and let it be.

Catholic Hermit's Field-Breaking

Well, just a note of reality therapy from this nothing consecrated Catholic hermit to any readers who read the previous post.  I got myself all worked up and enthused by the big boot-kick the Lord delivered through His Thoughts given centuries ago to Hosea the Prophet.

And then I got off the mattress and walked around, went outside, even, to see if the 1/2" cove molding I'd purchased to finish building out the trim around the French doors would work, to find it does not.  Plus, the trim I re-installed after switching out the slider for French doors, looks "off" because rather than trying to trim the siding that has to remain installed, I trimmed the trim wood to fit within where the concrete board siding had been.  So now the trim around the doors is not even.  It is off a bit, and of course my eye notices it easily.  Perhaps others will not especially when it is painted.

But the 1/2" cove does not fit properly to finish off the building out of trim.  The old farmhouse hermitage has 2x4" exterior wall construction, and the new, classy French doors I got from Craig at the lumber yard on a steal-deal, are the newer 2x6" exterior construction.  Thus I have to build out a bit of trim around the doorway.  Hmm.  I may have to rip some trim on the table saw, or use some other trim I have, but that might look odd given the fact that the rough side of the trim white board is up, not the smooth side, and all other trim I have on hand is smooth.

But what is the main glitch to this morning's desire to cooperate with the Lord's boot-kick of breaking up a new field for myself, at least physically to get into work mode again, is the awful headache, the right shoulder pain flaring from the two past shoulder surgeries, the right thumb at base by palm flaring up from drill-whip injury last December, and the low back radiating over to the liver area causing sickening pain, not to forget the pain down the legs and the feet as if on fire.

So today the breaking up the new field very much includes attitude and mind-set.  I am sure this is all intentional by the Lord--His Mind trying to get my mind out of the way so that He can replace my thoughts with His.  Breaking up new ground is not so easy if the mind is not His or at least if our own thoughts are not sublimating to His Thoughts.

And His Thoughts are always on that which is holy even if very much involving temporal details.  His Thoughts are always steeped with love and mercy.  So it is with mercy that the Lord Thinks, and I must get back up off this beckoning mattress and dig up some other trim options, something less than 1/2" and either small enough that smooth finish will not be so noticeable.

There are always options, and if the physical pain becomes too intrusive, then it is that the Lord's Mind Thinks this suffering servant ought to turn to simmering the neighbors proffered apples with some rhubarb from the gardens.  Break up that field--a far less physically demanding task.  The main Thought from the Lord is no doubt, today with the body as it is, that this hermit can also be sowing justice and reaping fruits of piety.  I can proceed in those aspects, yes.

Smile and laugh therapy time is at hand, also, in living out the Order of the Present Moment at Te Deum Hermitage!  Boot-kick the field-breaking in some interesting fashion or other!  Just wanted to share that while words expressed can sometimes make it seem easy, the reality can be challenging.  Breaking up a new field for ourselves takes spiritual effort and lots better if we remember Jesus is bearing the yoke with us.

Profound Experience, Reality, but...

A few nights ago this nothing consecrated Catholic hermit had yet another unbidden, unexpected experience in the night.  It was amazing, lovely--and thought the next day the Lord had surely treated me wondrously in response to the prayer love anthem offered via a famous singer's secular song.

But then the day before yesterday I learned of a family member's suddenly planned trip to bike solo through three European countries.

He left late last night, New York to Paris.

There is much more to this, considering it was this family member who the Lord took me in spirit to visit the other night.  And while there, my late mother also visited from the other side.  I was aware of her presence, and a sign was given that extended into the temporal reality of my own hermitage, here, and of her reminding me to do something that, indeed, I had totally forgotten about--practical.

But now the bi-location experience took on a different aspect rather than a wondrous treat for this hermit to be in loving company of the family member who has been off in our relationship, more estranged, and whose soul has over time gone farther, in fact turned away from, God.

I was going to write about bi-location, and this experience in particular lent itself to the discussion.  However, this morning when I began to pitchfork some larger-chunked wood bark from the pick up truck (Precious Blood, by name), and wheelbarrowed the first load to spread, I must have re-aggravated the upper left back muscle that was pulled on Monday last, when I took the first of two falls and slides on the pole barn roof while painting it.

By the third wheelbarrow of mulch, I was ill with acute muscle pain.  I made it inside, to the mattress in this small cell of a room.  I tried ice, then heat.  Now I am beyond able to cope physically with such pain.  Praise God!  Praise God for the medications to help, for the Order of the Present Moment that now dictates that there will be no work done, and enforced mattress time, until the muscle is not in spasms of screaming pain.

I cannot write more of the experience at this time.  But I do ask readers, if you are so inclined, to pray for the family member who is biking solo through France, Belgium, and Holland in the next couple of weeks.  His soul has been in trouble for a few years, and I admit to having shirked the intensity of praying that would be beneficial.  Immediate family members are concerned for his safety, of course.  There are other factors that make the safety an issue.  

But my main concern is for the soul.  I am praying that he turn back to the Lord, for there really is nothing worth more than a soul re-turned to God, secure in His Love.

Of all things--today this extreme muscle pull or tear.  Painful to breathe, move, write.  So will cease.  The Lord has chosen stillness, suffering, silence, solitude, simplicity, stability, selflessness, slowness, and prayerfully, serenity for today and until He gives further notice.  I was eager to do the chores of the land.  He wills I do the prayers of the Spirit, instead.

God bless His Real Presence, and thank you if you can lend your prayers for a young man, age 33, out on a pilgrimage of sorts, even if he'd not at all consider this solitary trek a pilgrim's seeking something more than what he has currently, within.

(I'd like to write more of the profound experience, the reality, but...present moment pain prohibits body movement much, even writing!  God's will.)

Catholic Hermit Been Praying and Working

The past week, this nothing consecrated Catholic hermit has been working on the hermitage bathroom and praying.  The thought has come of just how skilled and focused and hard-working are those who build.  I've thought much of St. Joseph and Jesus--all those in history of nations and civilization who figured out how to construct not just edifices but thoughts, words, art, music, and the spiritual life.

Yes, we build our spiritual lives.  We construct in certain order, in ways that sometimes we do not understand and by trial and error.  But we learn from the Holy Spirit as to how to listen, to pray, to proceed in our journeys in this life, this world, and on into eternity.

Today I had to figure out how to wire electrical light fixtures.  My son-in-law had started one of two in the bathroom, but the box that is nailed into the stud behind the drywall wobbled a little.  He became discouraged and evidently was not familiar with that type of box that is nailed to one side or the other of an upright wall stud.  Yes, one side could be pressed in slightly.

However, once the back plate is screwed in and the wires attached properly, and the fixture screwed into the back plate, the wall itself acts as a solid stabilizer.  He somehow could not grasp that on the day he tried.  I think he has mostly done ceiling fixtures with mounting boxes that are secured differently to ceiling joists and do not have any "give" on one side or the other.

So I thought about how my son-in-law has learned to wire light fixtures and realized that there is no reason why I should not be able to do it.  It takes courage, though, and courage comes with prayer and confidence in the Lord.  With faith, I started in, reading instructions and beginning the process of hanging the second light fixture.  

Of course, there were glitches.  There seem always to be in this old hermitage.  The electrical box was not flush with the drywall.  I called Mark, the electrician.  He said to use spacers to bring the face plate out so it would be more flush with the drywall.  It was not at all easy to get the spacers behind the screws and all secured in the proper place, with the mounting screws for the fixture, then, being aligned so that the light would hang straight on the wall.

I had to call Mark yet again with another question, and while asking the question, the answer came clear.  He laughed; I laughed.  A lot of these matters simply take doing and checking in with someone other who has more than ample experience.

And so, too, with our souls and the spiritual life.  Yet we must pray for courage and have faith that we can step forward in our seeking His Real Presence and that we will find Him always, with us and us with and in Him.  Sometimes we call upon a spiritual friend or spiritual director; or we read a book written by a spiritual master, tried and proven over time to be one who has reached divine union or nearly so while on yet on this earth.

Always, we can call upon Jesus and His apostles.  We can call upon the Blessed Mother, Mary.  We can call upon the Holy Spirit and God the Father of all beingness.  We can turn to the directions we are given in the Scriptures.  No matter the challenge or new skill or task or step we are encountering in our spiritual lives and growth, we do have the directions given us in the Living Word, the Bible.

The past few weeks, the Lord has been communicating more, reminding me of specific persons needing prayer.  It has become uncanny--truly miraculous. But why should that surprise us?  He desires to utilize us, and when enough of the distractions are tucked away and out of mind, our minds and hearts and souls are more open to listening in the silence of solitude.

If we do not see or hear the inner images or inner words and detect what He wishes of us, be assured His Real Presence will repeat His will in similar or other formats.  That has been the case, lately, and He makes sure if I miss the cues, that I get them even if the person needing prayer ends up contacting through temporal means.  But mostly, lately, He has let me know in ways that I grasp, and when a temporal contact comes along, the message had already been received.

Perhaps I may share some of these aspects with you sometime, my dear friends, dear blog readers.  I'm sure you will have many such similar, but it might also help as a reminder to expect His promptings and messages.  When they come, we must snatch them and act upon them with increasing faith and confidence in prayer and word and deed.

Tomorrow the daughter and son-in-law are going to come quite early to this hermitage.  They've not been here for some time; it is a trek out of civilization to arrive here.  We are going to set the toilet in the bathroom!  The slate floor is in place, grouted and sealed.  The tub that was set last summer now has all the tiling, grout, and sealant completed.  The window trim is cut, sanded, primed, painted, nailed and caulked.  (Yes, I did all the boards for the window wrap and casings in opposite order.  Craig explained that is why I had difficulties with gaps.  Now I know better for all the other windows.)

In our temporal lives and in our spiritual lives, we may do well to keep in mind that we are always learning.  We make mistakes.  We might pray and listen but miss the cues.  So we pray and listen some more, and we ask others in our lives who have experiences we have not yet encountered.  That is how it is in life. 

It has come to me in the silence of solitude and in the failures and successes, that some people learn a skill that they use repeatedly and become rather expert.  Others learn bits and pieces of skills in more generalized form and use.  Some are specialists, others are generalists.  We all are journeying together, even if some more in physical solitude and others more in active interactions or groupings. 

Such as with this old hermitage, we learn in various modalities.  Yet we find we are learning various aspects of experiences and lessons and skills enough--to be humbled enough--to praise God for the miracle of it all!  

God bless His Real Presence in us!

Catholic Hermit: Pain Severe

The pain is so severe this morning that it feels difficult to breathe.  Extremely fatigued so hard to have energy to breathe beyond little and not often.  Body is burning with quite a bit of pain, and am trying to consider that it is as "taking bullets" for souls--including this hermit's own soul!

It is not easy to have such faith, to have come upon a thought, a potential reality that is of the spiritual aspect.  A part of me would say it is not so, the aspects of suffering and of souls, of being what I rather humorously term being a "soulbuster."  Yet there is not much other explanation for the situations and souls I encounter, repeatedly, with the very good souls of much largesse and depth, sprinkled into the life experience.

Regardless, this level of pain is sapping whatever energy and strength I might otherwise possess.  There are so many tasks in here that I could attempt to accomplish, but the pain is blinding and binding.  Perhaps I can try to get off the mattress and heat up yesterday's left over coffee. There is always the option to take more medication; but that, at this level of pain, will not do much to help unless taking that which is given for extreme episodes to knock the body out, essentially.

What a life to lead!  If the pain can be turned around some, with the spirit and body and mind and heart on top of the pain rather than it on top of my being, I can begin work on cutting cement board to construct the shower niche recessed box.  Yet, on days like this one, in which the pain has sapped the body of energy and the eyelids keep drooping into a kind of autonomic dozing, an escape-mode from pain, I wonder if I will ever be able to maintain the efforts here.

Yes, the entire body is in a kind of burning sensation, and beneath the burning is raw, intractable pain. The feet are so painful--perhaps best to try to stand on them and see if that helps to push some pain out?  Rather sickening, really.  This is all part of this consecrated heart and soul's existence, daily life, spiritual being, Christian essence, hermit and suffering vocation, legacy:  so very much pain in so many aspects. 

Was this how Jesus felt when on the cross?  I believe so.  He existed on this earth as long as His body was able to function.  This is so for each of us, as well.

God bless His Real Presence in us!  Little children, let us love one another, for God Is Love!

Catholic Hermit on Holy Doors

The other day an elderly spiritual friend emailed news of diocese bishop desiring parishes to have holy doors in keeping with Pope Francis' declaration of the Year of Mercy and establishing a holy door such as Pope John Paul II dedicated for the new millennium in 2000.

However, the rector of their diocese cathedral was in a quandary, lasting a few days.  In fact, he contacted the parish council secretary three times--each to change which door of the church would be, in fact, the "holy door."  Finally, on the fourth change, he solved his great dilemma and had the secretary change the minutes to note that every door of the cathedral would be designated a holy one.

The only other changes to be made were to publish the updates in the parish bulletin and to ask the parish secretary to print out extra copies of the "indulgences" that those entering the holy door/s and doing certain religious practices and efforts would receive.

What are indulgences, many of this era may ask?  The following is a brief overview, beginning with the more general and concluding with examples depending upon the types of sins committed or indulged in.

"In the teaching of the Catholic Church, an indulgence is "a way to reduce the amount of punishment one has to undergo for sins" which may reduce either or both of the penance required after a sin has been forgiven, or after death, the time to be spent in Purgatory.

"The Catechism of the Catholic Church describes an indulgence as "a remission before God of the temporal punishment due to sins whose guilt has already been forgiven, which the faithful Christian who is duly disposed gains under certain prescribed conditions through the action of the Church which, as the minister of redemption, dispenses and applies with authority the treasury of the satisfactions of Christ and the saints".

"The recipient of an indulgence must perform an action to receive it. This is most often the saying (once, or many times) of a specified prayer, but may also include the visiting of a particular place, or the performance of specific good works.

"Indulgences were introduced to allow for the remission of the severe penances of the early Church and granted at the intercession of Christians awaiting martyrdom or at least imprisoned for the faith.^[3] They draw on the Treasury of Merit accumulated by Christ's superabundantly meritorious sacrifice on the cross and the virtues and penances of the saints. They are granted for specific good works and prayers in proportion to the devotion with which those good works are performed or prayers recited.

The information expands. Please indulge this nothing consecrated Catholic hermit.  The following are some examples of typically, contemporary, proffered actions which suggest that a person who fulfills them can receive remission of penalties of sins. 

"There are four general grants of indulgence, which are meant to encourage the faithful to infuse a Christian spirit into the actions of their daily lives and to strive for perfection of charity. These indulgences are partial, and their worth therefore depends on the fervor with which the person performs the recommended actions:

1. Raising the mind to God with humble trust while performing one's duties and bearing life's difficulties, and adding, at least mentally, some pious invocation.
2. Devoting oneself or one's goods compassionately in a spirit of faith to the service of one's brothers and sisters in need.
3. Freely abstaining in a spirit of penance from something licit and pleasant.
4. Freely giving open witness to one's faith before others in particular circumstances of everyday life.

"Among the particular grants, which, on closer inspection, will be seen to be included in one or more of the four general grants, especially the first, the Enchiridion Indulgentiarum draws special attention to four activities for which a plenary indulgence can be gained on any day, though only once a day:

1. Piously reading or listening to Sacred Scripture for at least half an hour.
2. Adoration of Jesus in the Eucharist for at least half an hour.
3. The pious exercise of the Stations of the Cross .
4. Recitation of the Rosary or the Akathist in a church or oratory, or in a family, a religious community, an association of the faithful and, in general, when several people come together for an honourable purpose.

"A plenary indulgence may also be gained on some occasions, which are not everyday occurrences. They include but are not limited to:

• Receiving, even by radio or television, the blessing given by the Pope Urbi et Orbi (to the city of Rome and to the world) or that which a bishop is authorized to give three times a year to the faithful of his diocese.
• Taking part devoutly in the celebration of a day devoted on a world level to a particular religious purpose.  Under this heading come the annual celebrations such as the World Day of Prayer for Vocations, and occasional celebrations such as World Youth Day.
• Taking part for at least three full days in a spiritual retreat.
• Taking part in some functions during the Week of Prayer for Christian Unity including its conclusion."

[*Sorry! I can't get the two points in larger print to be the same as all the others.  No emphasis intended.]

Is there any blog reader still logged on and reading?  I admit I did not read through the cited passages; I've read such years ago.  It is kindly that Catholics are made aware of and given reminders of what religious and spiritual activities, postures, prayers, and liturgical functions of which we may partake and participate.  Many Catholics, perhaps, don't understand or aren't aware that there are many aspects to prayer, to communicating with His Real Presence, of making creative and interesting offerings in every present moment: love gifts to the praise of His Glory!

What seems of interest is that there remains this notion of keeping souls at what St. Bernard of Clairvaux describes as the second degree of love.  That is, to love because of a reward of some sort.  Love God for what He will do for the person.  Why not tack on the holy doors, the explanation of the four degrees of love, and explain the fourth and highest degree (in St. Bernard's schema)?  Love God in Himself.  Explain what loving God means in some every day examples--of loving Him because He is Love and for no other motive, no strings attached.

There is far more that can be explained about loving God in Himself, and how that love then filters and flows from His Real Presence, and covers with love, all of humanity and creation, all souls, all breath, all energy and beingness.

And, as for holy doors, do we really think that once we touch them and enter through, either going in or out, that they are at all holy?  Once we touch or pass through, the door is not holy, more than likely, unless we are holy, ourselves.  What seems to be of consequence, is to ponder this fact and to realize that it is not the door, but the spaces in which we go in, or the spaces in which we enter when going out of a door, and if we live out holiness in those vast spaces whether the spaces of our souls or the world at large.

It took me a second or less to have holy doors in the hermitage and figure which ones to designate.  There are only two at this point.  (Of course, they are not at all holy because I am not holy, not really, not enough at least by my own consideration.)  Put I like the idea of designating them as holy as well as the space within the hermitage and the space outside the hermitage: the entire world and cosmos.  

My spiritual father sent a Christmas card and some cash, with the notation:  "Get some ice cream to eat!" inside.  (He knows I am living lean, working hard, suffering much, perhaps taking things a bit seriously these days.)  However, I really cannot justify ice cream when Craig just called to say the bathroom door with frame I ordered, has come in to the lumber yard.  

Immediately, I thought:  That bathroom door will also be a holy door!  It is the first interior door installed in this abode.  It is a signal for the interior holiness necessary and the work my soul needs to tend to--yes, with loving celebration.  The money sent by the holiest of priests, my spiritual father, will go towards that holy door.  The priest's love and mercy, expressed tangibly with some cash, is what will make that door "holy." 

Love.  Love God in Himself.  Live and love the God's law of love.

(Note: Above extractions on indulgences are from Wikpedia internet site.)