Christian Catholic Hermit Mystic: Mostly Spiritual, Not Temporal

I'm mostly spiritual, not temporal. I'm interested in the spiritual life, of the life of Christ, of the mystical elements of religion (a title of two volumes by a great writer, Baron Von Hugel), and of the spiritual and temporal application of Scripture in personal and societal daily life.  I enjoy sensing and pondering and writing of that which is above, of the Law of God--God's Law of Love--more than the laws created by humankind, especially that of canon (or church) laws.  

I grieve for Catholics who become ensnared in the entangling nets of the temporal.... their limbs thrashing about 'neath the surface of the waters of which years ago God showed me that I was desperately trying to untangle the nets to free the people--some whom I recognized from parishes including priests--who were caught in these nets.  Then God spoke to me.  He said, "They will be all right. I will help them. But you--you must swim on out into the deep! Go! Swim on to the other side!" 

So I stopped treading water by the immense nets that held all these people just below the surface of of the waters, and I turned outward and began to swim.  I looked to as far as my sight would allow, and I saw no end of the vast waters.  I swam on and on, and I am still swimming.

I am swimming, progressing onward into the deep, into the unknown of which God pointed and and directed those years ago.  I am swimming and progressing onward,despite my spine half fused and the next level up already deteriorating; and my neck has gone from being deemed "bad" to severe in less than a year between MRI's.  It is so severe that the neurosurgeon decided he did not want to operate unless it becomes life-threatening.  He had neurological testing performed, and although at times I wake up with my arms thumb through the hands, thus far feeling has returned in time.  

Recently, I have had another major surgery on my left knee; that, too, has been a failed surgery of 4-6% who have this occurrence of collagen cells reacting even during surgery to what is called oxidative stress.  This causes the cells to grow rapidly and thickly in a fibrous, impervious layer--mine two-inches thick covering over my artificial knee.  The pain is horrendous; my life style is forever altered between trying to do painful stretches throughout the day and using pain medications, and also trying to tend to the temporal responsibilities of the temporal aspect of my bodily existence here, now, on this temporal earth.

Yet my soul supersedes all else. I know this even if the temporal existence and those temporalites who exist around my temporal body, mostly unseen by me but here, there, ensnared and thrashing about in the immense nets beneath the surface of what is the temporal world and that of the deep and wide of eternity.  That is, of the world in which faith in God leads those of us who have all but the bodily left off from the temporal world and those thrashing about.  That is, of the temporalites who are ensnared in the temporal nets 'neath the surface of the waters; the focus and bulk of their accountability given over to the temporal world of temporal experiences and situations with other temporalites.  

The only way forward, out  of the entangling nets of the temporal, is to keep swimming, keep going, onward and forward, seeing not the other side.  Yet know that  freedom and blissful of touches of grace await us the more we broaden our sights, strengthen our strokes, not look back! Keep on! Keep on swimming out into the deep, onward with faith and hope, having let go of trying to free those who are not yet ready, those who do not grasp in reality there is something far more that awaits us the farther we reach with our hearts and minds and our very souls determined in faith that God is with us and also there for us, both, and, for all eternity.

But we must stay clear of the entangling nets, once we have been freed from the temporal reality that these nets ensnare us, keep us tied and entangled to a point of the blind thrashing about  becoming our norm within our existence in the temporal world and indeed, ensnared as well in the temporal tangibles and temporalizations of the temporal world of the temporal church. 

From the moment of realization of what is beyond us, what is unseen yet so very real, beyond us out into the depths and breadths of the spiritual life in His Real Presence, always and forever, we in trust simply and profoundly, in unknowingness of ontological beingness--we keep progress.

Onward and forward we progress into the very soul of God Almighty, Creator of Heaven and Earth. Yet God is the One, the All, to Whom we keep progressing despite the hindrances of our insufferable temporal bodies. For within these bodies, once we free ourselves in faith, hope, and love to give over to God the tending of those caught up into and of the entangling nets of the temporal realm of the world at large and the temporal world of church, and of all those choosing to remain stuck reman entangled in the temporal--we find that we are brought through and onward and forward, despite the ongoing effort of exchanging our own thrashing about with that of taking progressively forward strokes. 

We are bound and determined, no matter what, to keep going to whatever is there--to the heaven of God's Beingness and Energy, to that of God's pervasive and effervescent God's Allness.  God is there for us; God is with us along the endless breadth and depth of forward progression.  We know not but that God loves us and asks of us to keep on receiving His Love and learning His Love, to learn to love, to love God and others (and ourselves) as God loves.

This is the mostly spiritual  that at some point of which we do not know other than to know this point exists, in which we become deeply spiritual within the spiritual of God Himself. We become one with God's Beingness and Allness.  We become as if one with God's Supreme Soul. The as if becomes the truth, beauty, and goodness of not only spiritual union, but of mystical marriage with consummation.

This is what awaits us. This is why becoming aware of something more out there, beyond the entangling nets 'neath the surface of the waters. This is why we persevere in our seeking, no matter what befalls us or tries to interfere with the progression, we keep advancing by becoming mostly spiritual and less to least temporal.  We become unentangled from those temporalites who yet choose or acccept--either one--the temporal always mostly, and more than the the breadth and depth of the spiritual counterparts God desires for us, for our minds, hearts, and souls--if we simply keep going, once we are freed from the stuckness of the temporal nets.

Pray His Real Presence free everyone's mind, heart, and soul from the stuckness of entanglement in the ensnaring nets of whatever temporal.  Note the difference between being entangled by those temporal nets that represent the temporalization of the world at large and the world of church, as well as of the world of ourselves remaining entangled until by the grace of God, we are released through the teachings and life and sacrificial death of Christ Jesus, and ultimately by God's will we are freed from ourselves being entangled. Praise God with each inch of disentanglement, God's will and desire for us.

If I were an adept artist, I'd watercolor or pencil or ink sketch an image of this most powerful and real locution and vision.  I pray the description and word-metaphor of the entangling nets 'neath the doldrum-deceptive surface of the waters, assists the awakening from the living dead alive.  I pray that all temporalites realize the vast depths and breadths of the spiritual and masterful mystical realm of eternity that awaits us now, and has for every now of the present moment we've spent remaining piteously and desperately blind to our thrashing about stuckness in the temporal, of the entangling nets.

God bless His Real Presence is within us, the love of God, the love of God as others love, and to love ourselves as God loves, will always be ours to grasp and take with us onward and forward to reach that point of center, amidst the breadth and width of the Holiness of God's desire for us.

Swim on, swim on!  God will take care of all these others who are in His care, of whom God will free, will detangle these others who then must stay free and clear of the entangling nets. Rather, praise God for the faith, hope, and love of the reality of the blissful crossing that God has for us, onward and forward.  

The Stairway to Heaven is ours; we are by swimming onward and forward, not held back--we are led to the base.  The swimming onward and forward propels us, despite not knowing where nor able to see beyond ourselves. 

The Stairway to Heaven is given us, to provide for our onward and forward progression into, and then eternally remaining in the spiritual of our God-infused minds, hearts, and souls.  We advance all the while our insufferable attachments to our bodies and the temporalized aspects of the temporal world of varying types, fall far beyond us as well as the temporalites' plights.

God will take care of them, just as God is taking care of us.  It is never too late nor too early to learn to love, to love to learn to love God, to love others (and ourselves) as God loves!

 

Christian Catholic Mystic Hermit: Reminder of Being Led by His Real Presence

 Even today's Gospel, when Jesus refers to the one who wanted to follow Him but then asked leave to go back and say good bye to his family--not fit for the kingdom of Heaven, Jesus said, of those who put their hand to the plow or look back.  Cannot follow Him if attached and wanting and going back to other times, places, memories, even loved ones.

But this seems not for all people who follow Him, not for long, anyway.  Everyone lets go at death; there is no going back.  Even if the family is gathered at the bedside and saying how they love the person, that is not going to stop the mission and passing through from this world to the mystical, spiritual realm.  

Those who tell the Lord sincerely--heartfelt, deeply--to use the however He wants, must realize this means to be used in any way at all, and mostly not ways we'd think. And it also means that when He answers our please for help, He uses Scripture, and He MEANS it specifically, and that includes when it goes against what people think is acceptable and "right", and it includes what the temporal Church has set forth in human precepts that they set forth as doctrine, or in canon laws created by humankind over the centuries, or in protocol of the temporal church.  

And for some, it means that most if not all persons on earth cannot answer the questions; one must turn to God for the answers, and He may find someone on earth to help, but usually it is Himself or His Word Who answers, or He utilizes a soul from beyond earth to answer, or a heavenly being to deliver  a message answer (angel).  

It now seems right and natural, even good, that God has loved ones living their lives for the most part with the freedom of the suffering parent having passed on.  Not totally, as there might be a text now and then, but I have ceased from "going back to inquire or try to reach in and fit in" as I have a purpose and mission that was given me in addition to that of rearing my children.  They are reared and are all very successful and happy in their lives, careers, and social lives.  Not desired of, by them that I reach back in. 

Rather than look back or feel as if I ought to be other than whatever God wants of me, I must let go and remain ready for His answers and rejoice that I have Him directly now--and no, it has been shown me that I do not need to do what I remember every breath I take and waking hour of suffering.  He is in me and I am in Him, and that suffices; and I am part of the Body of Christ but not acceptable to the temporal Church because God has brought me to the reality also of His Mystical Church.  Yes, I so miss the temporal Mass which had become for me in the mystical state, blissful when the Mass was celebrated per God's will and Jesus' desires, a portal to His Real Presence and through to Heaven, literally a stairway to heaven for any to experience if they desired, would and then could.  

I must not yearn for what I've been asked why would I want THAT when I can have Him directly?  Of course, this goes against temporal protocol and human precepts taught as doctrine.  Being fed within by His Real Presence abiding within, goes against the weekly "obligation" as they call it in the temporal church.  And in the beginning of God calling me into the Church in which I felt I could not exist without the consecrated Host and Precious Blood daily and even twice daily by permission to go to two Masses daily--different parishes, rejoice in the Masses. 

But since the ecstasies began, of my angel saying I was being led to the stairway to heaven and shown--I have not yearned nor hungered for the tangible, consecrated Host and tangible consecrated wine.  I was and am fed by His Real Presence Whom I never forget, Who abides in me, all the time.

It's just that I did not trust enough and thought as the world thinks, regarding loved ones--and how can they understand or enjoy what was so heavy a burden for them, and nothing they can or could do to change the reality.

God alone can help those He has called to suffer; only God can answer the mystics' questions and needs and does so through locution, dreams, visions, His Word, supernatural visitations, and some temporal signals, as well.

Christian Catholic Hermit Mystic: How Sick Can a Hermit Be and Still Keep Going?

  

I'm wondering this very question, as am so very ill with not only pain but some kind of illness that I think is sinus infection but I suppose could be Covid if the long-form test comes back positive.  But it seems most likely is a sinus infection--the first one I've had since the pump surgery over a year ago that caused the Arachnoiditis to worsen the pain but also provided a rare but Arachnoiditis symptom of gastroparesis and nearly constant nausea.

The sickness is making the nausea worse, but I should be getting better before too long as got a zpack last evening after getting in to a doctor's appointment that they at first told me no opening until next Wednesday.  That was when I said I was fairly sure I had as sinus infection.  But then someone mentioned to me that Covid is mimicking sinus infections in some people, so I decided to call back and mention Covid potential, as that got more action.  Suddenly they had an opening the very next day.

With a sinus infection already taken root for two full days at that time, I'd be in very bad shape by next Wednesday.  I'm currently marveling at how I'm managing now, really not knowing how I was able to drive late yesterday to the doctor's office, be taken up a back way so climbing steps as they have Covid precaution, waiting for two separate Covid tests to be taken, waiting for the results of short form to show no Covid before the doctor would see me.  I had implored just please call in a script for Azythromycin, what always has helped these annual sinus infections.  When I've not gotten the z-pack soon enough, I'd end up in ER and then ill for a good five weeks and have it morph into strep throat, vertigo, or pneumonia or combination thereof.

So I feel quite blessed indeed to have the medication, unsure how I managed to also drive to the pharmacy and get myself back to my hermitage home abode.  His Real Presence and my Guardian Angel, Beth.  Now I am relying on HRP and the wonderful angel to help me endure plus help keep my pup Mercy reassured, for it's all I've been able to do to take her outside now and then to relieve herself.  She is not used to no exercise or play time, no walks.  But she's been allowed on the bed to play with pull toy; but this evening I am as my late dad used to say, "sicker'n a dog."

How does a hermit manage when very ill, and trying to keep going, too nauseated to eat but no appetite anyway, trying to help God's little creature, the little pup, get through this different type of situation for its first time?  The hermit relies on God fully, and lets go of all else, relinquishes the body to God, die to self more than ever before in the hermit's life.  Put the pup in the crate because the pup is not handling being taken out but upon return to house, going to the bathroom which has become a signal for the separation anxiety that can occur when there is but one person for the dog, such as is the case with a hermit having a pup.

The situation is not as direct when the hermit is able to take the pup for walks, play fetch, run errands which are necessary and the dog loves.  This is the first time to be ill on top of the serious back pain, so the hermit perseveres in prayer, patience, love, and yet crating the pup now when otherwise would not need to.  We all must adapt to the situations as they unfold.  

I'm becoming suspicious that this might be Covid as previously with a sinus infection, I feel better within 24 hours, but if anything I'm as bad if not worse. Yet, the doctor did note that the nasal passages are extremely inflamed and at times bleeding.  All I know is if I'd had to wait nearly a week more, my situation would be an unknown if could manage temporally alone and tend Mercy's few needs, also. But for now, being forced up to fill her water and food bowl, to take her outside on occasion, to let her up on the bed--to in this awful suffering be thinking of other than self--has been a positive.  

The pup is not suffering any wants other than would like, of course, more of my one one one attention.  I suppose I have spoiled her some with her exercise needs a priority, as when not so sick, I would yet force myself to take her on walks.  If she were not here, I'd otherwise just stay in bed far more, succumb to the pain situation, the increasing neuropathy of the Arachnoiditis, the nausea always and now for 17 months post pump surgery.

How sick can a hermit be and still keep going, here in the hermitage, alone with God and a four-and-half-month-old pup?  I suppose only God knows the answer.  I keep going in prayer and hanging on to His Real Presence, having long since learned to let the temporal drop by the wayside when the going gets rough.  One really only needs His Real Presence and the Spiritual and Mystical realities, even regarding a little creature of God such as Mercy the pup.  His Real Presence and my angel are looking over each of us, and the pup being in her crate a couple or three hours more than she's used to is not even close to dogs who are crated daily while their owners are away at work or out socializing.   It is said that dogs do not have awareness of time, thus those who crate their dogs are not causing harm to the pet.

I've considered how it would affect little Mercy should something happen to me more permanently. Would she be all right with someone else?  Would she grieve or develop behavioral problems (more than the touch of separation anxiety which I was prepared for, and could be far worse given the one owner here all the time, with the one dog)?  Thus I've been praying about a brother for Mercy, sometime in the future after she is more solid in her training, secure in her place here. I have read that of anyone, dogs most miss other dogs.  Being pack animals, another dog is more pro than con.  Especially with but one human, two dogs will exercise one another automatically, and will break up separation anxiety if that was a problem in the first dog.  However, two dogs need individual time with the human and both need their walks, and while the older dog will help train the younger or newer dog, the two of the can get themselves into mischief--double-trouble if not supervised adequately.  If something happens to the human, the two have each other, but of course that can complicate matters if someone adopting wants only one, not both.

Regardless, I like thinking about what is best for God's creatures, and not so much focusing on even my suffering and sickness such as now.  Mercy has added a most positive dimension to the hermit vocation rather than been an intrusion or distraction.  All the more I am intent on love of God above all else and love of others as God loves, when prior to getting the pup I had been concerned I might develop attachment and be distracted from my focus on His Real Presence and His Living Word, and God's Law of Love.  Rather, my days and nights have taken on a balance such as morning puppy nap time if the pain not too fatiguing, to do some manual labor, and the afternoon puppy naptime a time of the hermit's bodily rest and prayer.  Before Mercy, I'd keep working and praying with the manual labor, continuing on with the day's project.

Praying to keep going this evening, in the night, tomorrow morning.  Relying on His Real Presence to help me get up from bed and to not falter when walking, and then get Mercy situated in her crate and me back to bed.  That's the goal for the night, and thus far she seems settled down to our atypical horarium compared to life in the hermitage and with the hermit prior to the hermit becoming so ill with whatever it is.  I know it seems peevish, but now ailments all the more settle also into the body's weak areas, for me being the spine--neck down and radiating out where the damaged nerves yet travel with their confused signals of burning pain and odd synapses.  More pain right now than I've had of this type; nausea worse than ever before. All is magnified.

Why?  I consider the spiritual view, His Real Presence's perspective and my  body being utilized as a victim soul, my sufferings for years having been bound with Christ's sufferings: making reparation for the human ills that have evolved in Holy Mother Church over the centuries.  This is simple cause and effect, plus direct correlation in a physical plane and pain reality of tremendous mystical proportions and mystical reality.  Both temporal and mystical made one for God's purposes and His will and desire.

It's the type of supernatural reality that most people would have difficult fathoming, let alone accepting as quite real, as real as how sick I am with pain this very moment, and knowing His Real Presence is right here with me, in me, through me, handling all however He wills, for however long, including whatever outcomes He chooses.  My job is to pray and die to self, and do my best to try, to simply try to get up now and then and take Mercy outside, or as I did a bit ago, pick up the accident she had in the bathroom.  Its as if I'm a ghost functioning without my own awareness or drive, all is autonomic movement from beyond temporal self while at the same time so very, very sick with pain and nausea, the head feeling as if out of body other than the spine radiating pain to remind me my body is yet attached by threads of raw pain.

I appreciate your prayers for patient endurance, faith, and selfless love in suffering.  Thank you.

God bless His Real Presence in us!  Love in His Love!

Catholic Hermit: Come to Jesus

For quite awhile I've been considering very much the trouble people are having--Christians, but mostly Catholic Christians due to the Sacraments and the Mass.  For within most dioceses in many states, countries, regions where COVID-19 is rampant or on the rise, the churches are not open for people to come and gather to worship (Mass) nor to enter for prayer, nor to come for Sacraments such as baptisms and reconciliation (confession), nor even funeral gatherings.

I've received information that I suspect is not an isolated case.  A parish priest or even a bishop, decides to leave churches open for people to come in to adoration chapels or into the churches, leaving their doors unlocked and encouraging prayer on site.  One bishop evidently stated that as long as grocery stores are allowed to be open, the churches will remain open.

Of course, we realize that these two "places" are not equivalent--not spiritually, but more so, not in practical aspects.  People are allowed to go into a grocery store, doors automatically opening.  The  person uses a cart that they can wipe down themselves with wipes at entrance, stay a distance, not necessarily know people they know so not tempted to stop and talk, procure their groceries, use the self-check-out or go through a checker, but again not the interaction risk of communicating nor remaining in one spot but moving on through and out.

When a person goes into an adoration chapel or church, one opens using the door handle.  Even if no holy water remaining--most parishes hopefully have removed holy water from fonts quite awhile ago--the person then enters, perhaps touches the plate or handle for the door into the apse of the church after passing through the narthex.  If an adoration chapel, then the person enters into a relatively small space, a room of varying sizes, often with no windows that open or if so would mean more touching to open a window to air out the space.  The person touches the pew or chair to sit, or the kneeler to kneel. The person sits, and there may be others there.  

(In at least one such parish church remaining unlocked, the priest asks people to sit in the two or so handicap-designated pews (to limit the amount of cleaning, once a day.  But it also keeps those who do indeed come in, to sit even closer in proximity.  On social media states he is in there himself, with Jesus alone in Tabernacle, waiting for people to come and pray.  Sweetly pious-sounding, but not prudent in logistics at this time of pandemic.)  

Such behaviors, no matter who or where, encourages persons to not take seriously the "lockdown" that state and many states and communities now have ordered for staying in, sheltering in place.  These orders are for all those other than for "necessary" jobs or places: medical professionals, law enforcement, medics, grocery, pharmacy, and a few other deemed necessary for the functioning of human's requisite tangible needs.

There is no one monitoring people gathering in church spaces, small or large, reminding to keep distance from one another. But the problem is the touching of surfaces and then taking potential virus out and into the community on their way to their homes, where there are others often enough, who can then become infected if the person has picked up virus on clothing, shoes, hands.  

In the particular situation of which I became aware--another locale--the priest has stated that the door handles are wiped daily and the pews wiped twice a week, but with keeping people to couple of pews, once a day.  Seems unaware of how fabric-padded seat cushions cannot be simply wiped off to disinfect, nor aware of how long coronavirus stays on solid surfaces, fabrics, paper prayer cards, cardboard (paperback worship booklets in pews, hymnals, etc.), carpet, doorhandles, wood pew or chairs, or the up to three hours it can stay in the air, particularly in enclosed spaces without much air movement.

You can imagine the uproar that occurred when a person shared the facts and realities of COVID-19 on a parish social media site. There were those who attacked the one who mentioned the inadvisability of going into the church and/or adoration chapel, giving reasons as well as tried to explain Jesus is within us wherever we are.  Why not just follow the lockdown order for the two or three weeks, and pray at home?  But others became irate on the social media discussion site.  

The person's comments were blocked, but not before they were told that they had no Authority to suggest such a thing: that people consider not going in, not gathering, but to pray at home for the time being.  I've since been informed that someone of that parish social media site has taken on the position of censoring and determining what comments allowed and what not.  A shameful thing, it seems, to exclude, to ban, a fellow parishioner's input which included factual helps and encouragement.  

It remains to be seen if such as offering the internet link to Cardinal Dolan's (NYC) national and international interview will be posted on that parish site.  Will the person who has taken it upon him- or herself to censor Parish FaceBook site discussion considers the Cardinal a good enough "Authority"? He spoke exactly to what these Catholic parishioners had attacked coming from one of their own.

Thus ended that wise and prudent attempt of one wee person in a parish elsewhere, to help others stay safe, keep others protected from potential contagion, be obedient to the law of the land, to exercise free speech.  The group refused to recognize and embrace a magnificent opportunity to increase in their FAITH.  We must keep a sense of compassion and also humor in the foible-ridden plague of human nature.

To the persons who had attacked, some mentioned they "feel safe in the church."  I recall a priest who had been at that very parish for 35 years and made quite an imprint in various ways.  He used to remind people, "Faith is not feelings."  However, we no doubt can recognize in others and ourselves not simply thinking through the severity of this pandemic but running on and fanning the fumes of feelings. Do we not believe in these very words spoken in Mass, regarding consecration of the Host--His Real Presence:  through Him, with Him, IN HIM?  Christ is IN US.

Jesus has said, "The Kingdom of God is within!"  On the Solemnity of the Annunciation a couple of days ago, Isaiah wrote of the virgin bearing a son, and He would be the savior of the world, and He would be Emmanuel:  God with us!  Just today in an interview, Cardinal Dolan of New York City spoke eloquently and passionately to remind people that Jesus is with us, we are never alone, and what a good time for us to lower our pride, to accept we do not have the answers and do not know nor can control what is happening, but in humility and in faith, God is with us and will bring us through.  

The Gospel of John shares this message as well, in yet a different way and perspective.  In chapter 5 we read these lines that ought to consider carefully where is our faith--at what level, at what depth or breadth.  I will write out the lines that struck me most of these words of Jesus Christ, and His trying to get through to us, that while there are many means for knowing Jesus.  

There are persons holy and intermediary who  enrich our faith, provide the sacraments, guide us in spiritual life.  We have the Scriptures containing His Living Word and great writings of holy persons that help us in knowing Jesus.  But always, we can simply and truly come to Jesus any time, any place--in our bodies, minds, hearts, and souls!  Jesus abides in us, and we abide in Him!

"'[Jesus said]...Moreover, the Father who sent me has testified on my behalf.  But you have never heard his voice nor seen his form, and you do not have his word remaining in you, because you do not believe in the one whom he has sent.  You search the scriptures, because you think you have eternal life through them; even they testify on my behalf.  

"But you do not want to come to me to have life.  I do not accept human praise; moreover, I know that you do not have the love of God in you.  I came in the name of my Father, but you do not accept me; yet if another comes in his own name, you will accept him."

Think on these of Jesus' own words.  We are so tempted to accept others more than we do Jesus Himself!  We rely on Scriptures when we have Jesus within us always.  (And this is not to say that we ought not search the scriptures--but search them to know Jesus all the more.)  But we can forget that it is not the scriptures that will give us eternal life; Jesus gives us eternal life.  Why not simply, truly, come to Jesus to have life?

Jesus does not accept human praise!  But do we know anyone who does?  That is a point for discernment, especially of those who strive to be such as any of us followers of Christ, or even of those ordained to be as alter Christus, or in the person of Jesus.  Do any of us or do we know of those who accept human praise or take pride in position and lose a sense of humility in doing what is prudent and wise?

Truly, this section of Jesus' very words have made a tremendous impact on me, a nothing consecrated Catholic hermit.  I have gone through a period of discerning myself, discerning situations and persons in ways that the Lord has desired me to granularly discern.  And the Lord, also, has been working with me in the sickness and solitude of my own 25 days now of still recovering from being very ill with not COVID-19, but with an awful, upper respiratory infection.  

The thoughts are too much to share right now and perhaps not ever; what the Lord has helped me discern still being absorbed.  I'm mulling what it all means, what will evolve, what direction and what He wills with me.  But my faith is growing in a way I'd not anticipated, and in the major solitude in ways indescribable I remain His alone.  While I am very much enrapt in the Body of Christ,  I am all the more through, with, in:  Solus Deus!  God alone!  

I come to Jesus.  Here I am, Lord.  I have come to do--to be Thy will.

God bless His Real Presence in us!'

People, please stay home. Stop the spread of COVID-19.  Can we not spend a little while with Jesus in our dwellings, stay with Him Who is in us?  

Catholic Hermit: Praying My Way Through

This 27th Sunday in Ordinary Time began filled with expectation of goodness, of hope in God for perhaps being over the set-back physically, of increased, problematic spinal pain.  I was looking forward, as well, to a visit from a family member--just brief, but thought might include a little conversation.

Rather, I awoke with a terrible headache and playing catch-up with pain after finally getting to sleep sometimes after 3:30 a.m.  No, I did not take that dreaded little costly pill that perhaps would help the sleep stretch a couple or two hours longer.  The spinal headache?  Who knows but God and the inner workings of my spine as to why that flared more than usual.

I realized from yesterday's post of "writing my way through this pain" that my writing is actually additional conversation with and in His Real Presence, such as my thoughts are.  He is my Company, my constant Visitor, my ever-present Spouse, my also-Wounded One.  So I decided to write today about praying my way through--not just through the pain but through it all, all of whatever all this life is and whomever and whatever and wherever of the temporal past, present, and future of this life.

Took awhile--all morning and into afternoon to contend with the pain, other than to get up a couple times for coffee and then for oatmeal, and then finally to go for the teenie walk past the 7 or so houses and back.  But I was motivated!  I was uplifted by the Scriptures proclaimed all over the world in the celebration of today's Mass!

From St. Paul in his Second Letter to Timothy, first chapter, I was uplifted (and really, still am although hit a rough patch late afternoon) by these words:

"For God did not give us a spirit of cowardice
but rather of power and love and self-control.
So do not be ashamed of your testimony to our Lord,
nor of me, a prisoner for his sake;
but bear your share of hardship for the gospel
with the strength that comes from God.

I need yet to mull these words, especially that of bearing my share of hardship for the gospel with the strength that comes from God.  I must bear it--whatever hurts, whatever disappointments, whatever of the great unknowns that come not only for me but for those who I have born, know, and love.

Then came the Gospel reading from Luke 17.  I recall in a major vision and locution that Dr. H. witnessed and tape recorded some 33 years ago June past, that it was emphasized to me to read in Luke 17 as it would explain to me about faith over fear.  So here we have it.  The apostles say to the Lord, "Increase our faith."

And the Lord answers them, "If you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you would say to this mulberry tree, 'Be uprooted and planted in the sea,' and it would obey you.'"

Then Jesus continues to teach them by placing them into an example of what they would say to a servant of theirs, come in from work in the field.  Jesus explains they would not tell their servant to come sit with them at table [as an equal to the servant's master], but rather wouldn't they tell their servant to first prepare something for them to eat, then wait on them at table, and then tell the servant to eat when they are finished?

Jesus then said, "So should it be with you.  When you have done all you have been commanded, say, 'We are unprofitable servants; we have done what we were obliged to do."

I realize it is now evening here in Solus Deus Hermitage.  My visitor and a young person with the visitor, have come and gone in a whoosh of a few minutes, the young one fussing about trying to get some outdoor folding chairs in a storage closet by the patio, the older one encouraging, helping, rushing the process along.  An additional errand will be run to fill another medication script whenever the person has the time.  I quickly handed over the prescription form and credit card, grateful. 

I don't think the young person even turned the face or eyes upon me, not once.  The older visitor did so, I think; all was so rushed it is hard to recall.  They were busy about many things, scurrying out the door on their way to meet with friends for dinner out.

I realize yet again what an odd world I live in, here in the solitude of silence.  It is a world thrust upon me all the more after this major back surgery came along, rather taking me by surprise by the high level of pain and the extensive nature of what it has caused in limitations and so-lengthy recovery, beyond what I could ever have fathomed.

I consider the situation with the visitors.  I'm sure had it not been for the car accident, the painful divorce, the death experience in recovery between surgeries in 1987, I'd be far different than what I became, how I evolved rather rapidly, just from the accident and earthly spouse leaving in a series of three leavings over a few months, beginning about three weeks after the accident.  It was a shock, all that.  

All through, I did my best with what I was to do, with my tasks essentially as a servant would be asked by the Lord to do.  In the death experience, I was sent back to a life of great suffering pain "to rear my children and fulfill my mission."  In those early months and years after the surgeries and with my realizing the surgeries had left me permanently disabled with the ups and downs of pain sieges and constant back pain, including constant headache, I think I must have been more inspirational, more their loving example and trusted guide.

Now, I must say in all truthfulness to the Lord, looking back and the entire, painful existence even more so when the children graduated college and went out on their own all the more fully--now I must say to God:  I am an unprofitable servant.  I do not even know if I did what basics You wanted me to do, or even what I was obliged to do--let alone do anything more.  I thought I had tried so hard.  But surely not, Lord; I think I must not have proven worthy of the charge You gave me.

It takes great faith to overcome fear of not having done enough, not loved enough, not been enough, not overcoming enough in this life.  It takes greater faith to trust in the love of God to continue on through various life phases and in the details of daily encounters and duties--the vocations we are given, the people we encounter, the thoughts we have, the love we try to offer, the prayers we pray.  

It takes a greater faith to step from each present moment into the unknown of the next moment, to have the faith to overcome fear, to set aside what is painful in being as unprofitable servants to others, only doing what we are obliged to do, and also to set aside that we are experiencing likewise, ourselves.  

Surely, I had set poor example in one regard of which I will not write; but I know what it is, and I am receiving what I, too, did, how I must have given bad example, and that now is dealt me to experience, to see how wrong, how it reels back upon oneself.  This is one way to learn without being able to alter the course of our flaws.  This is penance.

In that recognition as such, in faith, we try to remove the sting, ease the inner pain that comes from such recognition of our not having done better than average or less, and at that, even complained in the hearing of impressionable others.  Unprofitable servants--how easy it is to forget, that had we more faith, we can stretch ourselves so much further in loving God and loving others as ourselves.

So I'm praying my way through various types of pain. I need to feel this other-than-physical pain as well as the physical, though, or the Lord would not have laid it on me today.  And while I so want to escape, to be able to even physically leave, I cannot.  My body cannot go and do for itself other than painful, teenie walks past 7 houses and back, and simmer some fresh turnips for supper. 

I'm praying my through, asking for greater faith in whatever is asked of me in the next moment after this one.  I pray to be a more profitable servant, to even think in terms of being a servant in all aspects.  Yes,  a servant would be treated in dismissive ways and even so would love, would desire to serve and to pray do far beyond obligations.

Perhaps the Lord asks of me to be yet more grateful for whatever crumbs tossed my way.  Be grateful for the turnips; be grateful for those who are busy and rushed about many things.  Being grateful no matter what--that is, being more than what is obliged, is it?  Is that part of being a profitable servant--to recognize my past wrongs and feeling the sting of the same, later, being done to me, and then yet being grateful?

Once more, Scripture reminds of the strength that comes from God.  I am to bear the hardships for the sake of the Gospel, and certainly not having the great faith that moves mountains is a hardship.  But faith is the flip side of fear, and the Lord will increase my faith to courageously keep praying my way through and to simply keep going.  And yet, love and be grateful.

God bless His Real Presence in us!

Catholic Hermit: Faith and Affliction

Been a rough week and especially another couple of days in the affliction aspect of temporal existence.  Thus on this Sunday morning in ordinary time, the Living Word of God provides truth as well as encouragement--if I can but absorb and hold fast to faith in the unseen reality.

From 2 Corinthians 4 comes this excerpt that especially strengthens: 

Therefore, we are not discouraged;
rather, although our outer self is wasting away,
our inner self is being renewed day by day.
For this momentary light affliction
is producing for us an eternal weight of glory
beyond all comparison,
as we look not to what is seen but to what is unseen;
for what is seen is transitory, but what is unseen is eternal.
For we know that if our earthly dwelling, a tent,
should be destroyed,
we have a building from God,
a dwelling not made with hands, eternal in heaven.

The one word that tripped my mind, first, is "light".  Light affliction is rather an irony, as I tested putting weight on my left leg while up for a timed two minutes plus perhaps another 30 seconds enough to get too and from sleeping bag to kitchen and back, fill my St. Joseph mug with water, microwave green tea for 1 minute, 50 seconds, during which time I filled a water bottle.  Pain still in left leg, particularly knee.

After being down since Friday late morning, and the pain yesterday at throbbing and piercing level in the knee, I'm wondering about the "momentary light affliction" that St. Paul considers for our temporal body existence that he also says will produce an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison.

I suppose, truly, in the full spectrum of temporal bodies and the afflictions we are allowed and which occur in the natural progression of life circumstances and are mortal bodies which decline moment by moment, mostly imperceptibly over time, other than when we have an acute injury.  Yet it is best to try to consider and absorb the reality of fullness of life both temporal and mystical--the eternal spiritual realm ongoing from alpha to omega, even now, in this present moment.

In that reality, anything we experience while in our temporal bodies is comparatively "momentary" and whatever affliction "light".

Our affliction, basically, is of our souls, spirits, minds, and emotions being tied to a physical body in this temporal life.  The fact that this "affliction"--light or otherwise in our perceptions--is producing for us glory beyond all expectations...is what will keep us from discouragement if we can but hold onto this numinous reality while we suffer light or heavy affliction or any affliction of any type of any circumstance.

That we are not discouraged is a bold statement and bold step.  I admit that my faith in the presence of additional physical pain is not strong enough.  Yes, I do believe that I will rise with Christ as I believe in Christ and know there is a resurrection from the dead, and that He Who raised Christ will raise me to have a place with Him in eternity.

The problem I face especially now with not wanting to invite more pain for my already pain-loaded body, is that being laid up with the knee pain does complicate matters.  There is no one here but the Lord and my angel and whatever ethereal holy ones are around me in this small room as I lay on the floor.  My money has run lower than ever in my adult life, by far, and it is not even my own money but lent money.  I am quite close to finishing this earthly dwelling with the hope of selling; but until my knee decides to heal or else not and my somehow getting to a knee orthopedic specialist, makes it more the challenge to not be discouraged.

We have the human dilemma of faith involved, and of knowing in the mind and heart and soul that Paul is so right--this is but temporary time in our bodies, and the affliction momentary and light in comparison to glory in eternity.  Yet somehow the temporal aspect of pain can rivet the attention to the temporal seemingly quite easily and effectively.

The antidote to the dilemma is, of course, to look to the unseen, not the seen.  To pray and communicate with the Lord even if it seems one-sided (such as I had to face the one-sided nature of a temporal friendship's comdmunication trends for a long while), is part of learning to see the unseen, to know with assurance without touching nor viewing nor hearing anything at all.

Faith, it is called.  Sometimes "blind" is added to the word "faith."  Blind addresses the unseen quality of faith in Christ.  We do have His Living Words, and that is a major gift to us.  And no matter our vocation in life, all that is written and preached through the Living Word of God applies to any and all souls.  

The result is a lifting up and out of the temporal body in a partiality that is quite refreshing and necessary, as faith raises thoughts and emotions and spirit to a realistic hope that is known yet not achieved--not yet.  

But I so appreciate this reminder of what is real and what can trip me, reduce me, stir fear with temporal stirring stick.  In my case, it does not even have to be anything definitively conclusive, such as an aneurism or paralysis.  Just a hard-smack impact on concrete is enough to afflict the body to a higher level of pain than the pain already taken to roost in this body for nearly 34 years.  Doubling pain medication yesterday did not put a stop to the pulsating knee pain.  It took hours of waiting which seemed not at all momentary.  But here again, now when I consider it in respect to eternity--yes, it is momentary and light affliction.

More importantly, consider the weight of glory being produced eternally--beyond all comparison.

What is now, here, in this temporal--I can really do nothing to alter the current circumstance of the left knee.  I must simply remain down other than brief trial experiments in getting something to drink or using the restroom.  I've wondered if there are forces of darkness allowed to disrupt the flow of finishing this earthly dwelling place so that I can depart it?  This is a serious consideration, for the first nearly four years here, there was much negative interference from dark side of spiritual realm.  

Faith holds true and fast against the forces of darkness.  So I will continue on in this present moment and ensuing moments, with not being discouraged.  Practice focusing on what is unseen--which requires not mortal logic to achieve in reality.  See with inner sight the unseen, which is seeable in the light of inner light of inner faith.  Our inner selves are being renewed while our outer selves diminish.  Fear not, have faith.  Once again, dare enter into the mystical; don't cling to the temporal.  Keep to and think on things above, as Jesus tells us in sundry ways.

God bless His Real Presence in us!

Catholic Hermit: Slow, Suffering Lent

Tonight will be a week since receiving the blessed and coveted zpack (Azithromycin antibiotic).  On Tuesday, vertigo set in.  (Read online that vertigo can come with sinus infection: pressure on Eustachian tubes which then affect middle and/or inner ear).

I'm still down on the sleeping bag.  The sinuses are starting to drain a little.  That will help, but the disorientation is such that getting up and walking about is problematic.  I do hope to get to mailbox, though, at some point today, as I ordered some decongestants on Amazon Prime.  (I had to pay out the money for Prime for the more cost-effective way of receiving them sooner than later.)  Tomorrow ought be a package of expectorant, also ordered via Amazon Prime.

The clinic has stopped their haggling; I now have a reprieve until Monday when I am to go in for the appointment that was the condition given me in order for them to call in a zpack.  I'm hoping and praying by Monday I will be able to walk to truck and drive to clinic.  We shall see.  Only God knows.

The couple from the parish--at least the wife--are/is aware that I am yet down, now with vertigo.  They knew as of Tuesday evening when I received a text asking if I had spare shingles; the man is kindly going to repair a neighbor woman's roof after storms did damage.  So I had to respond that I think I do, under the house; but I am unable to get up to check due to vertigo.  A response gave information that they are going to be away in civilization yesterday and today.

Now, of course, my wondering mind considered why they would not ask if I needed anything?  Actually, I had thought that last Sunday when I received a text asking how I was, and then I was yet quite ill with the strep and sinus, so down but could tell improvement would come.  But the Lord gives us understanding into how we humans think, or sometimes do not think in what we'd hope would be universal concern.

And so it is that the Lord has taught me this week what I've struggled with in the past:  Why others (seems to be especially Catholics, but that might be due to their sharing a church with me and thus maybe more in my expectations) tend not to grasp when another needs something, or what that need is.

Rather, it seems that often enough we humans think in terms of what we think someone might need, or what we want to offer in way of help.  So while someone might see my house unfinished and materials and tools cluttered about, and think it should be finished, and want to paint or put in trim even if walls or flooring not ready for trim--someone else might think in terms of what he or she might want or need in a given situation...or not even be able to relate to someone else's situation.

For example, I have previously pondered human idiosyncrasies.  So it was no surprise yet an insight, that people who are highly scheduled would perceive others as also being highly scheduled, and thus unable to fit into their schedule easily, to drop off some food or medication.  Yet in reality, not everyone is highly scheduled, or they could say they could not do something if asked, and on to the next person.

Or, people who have never lived on their own--and this can be for many people for many years over a lifetime until one of the couple or group dies--might not perceive at all what it would be like to be unable to be up and around or drive themselves if ill.  And, people who have not had something like vertigo, might not grasp how debilitating; or if they have had it, they might forget what it was like--much as a mother tends to forget the pain of childbirth once the baby is born.

An adult daughter called the other morning and mentioned how this is not a good situation, my not being able to be up and around and no one to check in or help.  I pointed out that I, too, had started to think in that direction, particularly when the one couple who do know my circumstances and who are in a position to drop off some food or decongestants, do not think of that aspect.  

For one thing, we humans primarily think of our own needs, such as I have been doing since becoming ill.  I thought of how I needed an antibiotic to address the strep throat, and how if I could get to the clinic it would have to be on a gurney.  But beside the fact that we tend to think mostly in terms of our own experience and existence, we can learn otherwise.  We can think in ways God thinks.

Yes, this is difficult for He is God and we are not.  Yet in our striving to love God and to imitate God (So be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect), we can open our minds to other aspects, other views.  We can pray and ask God to show us how to see in whatever situation we find ourselves.

Thus I see that when I calm myself and see that while I do not have variety of foods, I have some food to consume.  I can become mindful of what is back in the cupboard that can be transformed into more consumable food, such as some old, dried cherries that with water are making a fine, hot drink.  And I'd forgotten that cherries are a good source of Vitamin A; boosts the immune system.

I see that I am just fine on my own in here.  I assured the adult daughter that I am most careful when getting up off the sleeping bag, and in the bathroom I can grab the side of the tub, and in the kitchen the counters, and I have corners of walls to grip if need-be.  The one time I did spin out and fall was when I was not yet off the sleeping bag so not far to drop.  And that was enough to let me know to be even more careful.

Above all, the Lord is making His Real Presence known in here.  He is with me, and I am with Him.  I must depend on Him; and that is what I believe is His main point in this slow, Lenten suffering.  I am to simmer slowly in the insight of His Real Presence.  The Lord is my Shepherd; I shall not want.

Once I realized I do not need the couple to ask if I need anything, my mind cleared to realize that while it costs a bit, I could get Amazon Prime and have maybe not the strongest of the decongestants, but good decongestants and expectorants all the same--in two days.  It is in waiting that one possesses one's soul.

I also realized, when a cousin who lives two thousand miles away offered to send--two-day base-rate shipping--that I can order online from Walmart, and in two days I would have such as more chicken broth, tissues, and whatever else of staples they can ship, free if one purchases $35 or more.  Yet I do not need anything, really.  I have peanut butter, eggs, cheese in freezer, some crackers, the dried fruit, Edamame, and frozen Brussels sprouts.  I have a can of black beans, as well, and some protein bars.  I have some oatmeal remaining and some frozen, pureed tomatoes from last summer's garden.

Most of all, I have the Lord!  I will write otherwise of the visit from a demon last Saturday morning.  Although I shared it with the adult daughter as well as my cousin when they called, I'm not sure they could appreciate the impact.  But all the same, I added after describing the experience, that where the devil is allowed to visit, the Lord is, all the more.  And there are always positive insights following a demon's visit.  

Yes, I will write of this recent visitor and of the positive lesson, for it is applicable to any situation.  In fact, it summarizes what I have learned this weak, of how to view people and situations in a manner more in keeping with how God views.  Makes all the difference to at least ask God to see as He sees, and then to strive to do likewise.

God bless His Real Presence in us!

Catholic Hermit Prays to Put on Love

Well, wonders never cease.  The Lord has shown my impatience, on the one hand.  Yet it was probably my Christmas Eve phone message to the parish administrator, promising my prayers for her and her family,  my apology for popping off previously, over frustrations, and then I mentioned the couple who was to bring Communion had never made contact, but it was all right.

Four days later I received a phone message--from the woman of the couple who said they'd bring Communion!  I waited awhile to pray and consider before returning the call.  As it turns out, the woman had a bad cold the past month; and perhaps, I consider, she did not know I had been told they would contact me, thus no phone call explaining she had a horrible cold.

It was a good experience, though, for a lot of pain and upset of the past erupted on Christmas Day.  I grieved what had transpired in my Catholic existence over the years, much of it painful.  Yet the spiritual growth also brings with it, fruit.  There is even fruit in recognizing how painful can be the spiritual journey and the stretching that occurs, also, in seeking intently after Christ.  Some lives have a lot of suffering; and the eremitic vocation is not easy at times, either.

Before returning the woman's phone call, I determined to stick with the truth of my situation.  She had already been told some, and that telling, my couple of spiritual friends and I felt, would make the couple wary--and thus my assuming they were not going to be in contact.  So in the conversation, I mentioned this with humor, and I also honestly mentioned that I hope somehow the couple bringing me Communion will be the beginning of some healing and grace of courage to once again attempt Mass in the parish.  

It just seems to me that if parishioners and priests can get over what may seem an odd phenomenon, or resist judging that it is something other, and be pleasant, get to know one another at a simple level of trust and kindness and humor, we will all be better off.

Yet, I am still quite interested in researching and writing about the treatment of mystics in the Catholic Church.  When did the harshness begin?  What are some of the hypotheses as to why the practice of scrutiny and being the devil's advocate began in the first place?  Why have Catholics continued with the hurtful practice, even if they have ceased physically killing the persons who are spiritually sensitive and different?  Does such treatment of mystics occur in the Eastern Church or in other rites within the Western Church?

The couple plans to bring Holy Communion on Sunday morning after they go to the early Mass.  She said they will see how it goes.  Yes, I will, also; yet my hopes are raised high but with the reminder to self that if the outcome is not as I wish, that I will not react with upset or hurt but will try to be patient and trusting in the Lord Jesus to show me His path forward.

Yes, I emailed the couple of spiritual friends as well as Fr. V., to mention my impatience proved me wrong in this, and the couple is willing to come, and will come, God-willing and provided no obstacles in their way this Sunday.  At least the woman knows my hopes, and I continued on with truthful disclosure for I at one point thought if I ever would attempt another parish, I would be better off lying and just saying I had narcolepsy.  At least then, their might be pity rather than scrutiny.  

But not telling the truth is never right, of course!  It was at least an ironic thought--to lie in order to be accepted and not shunned, in church!  Deceive priests and parishioners in order to avoid persecution. Much better to express truth and pray to move beyond the minor but admittedly kind of rare obstacle.

The optional first reading for today, the Solemnity of the Holy Family, contains excellent advice--prudent and wise counsel!  May I take it to heart and pray to put on each attribute with great faith that as you, dear readers, we are all God's chosen ones, holy and beloved.  I had better once again pray to forgive those with whom I have grievances.  

Most of them would not have given it another thought--that there might be grievances against them, in my thoughts, for their behaviors and reactions toward one insignificant and easily forgotten person.  Yet I remember, and remember far too much and to a negative degree.  Forgiveness on my part is crucial for healing and health.  I am considering going to sacramental confession--that only--but first am making contrition to His Real Presence in my heart, mind, and soul.

Since the surprise phone call, I have been better able to focus on manual labor.  A closet is framed and part of another; some additional drywall is installed; and I am tediously scraping 104-year-old painted newspapers from a wood ceiling upstairs and removing numerous tacks from that ceiling so that more tongue-in-groove ceiling wood can be nailed in properly.  

(Amazing how some old paper and little tack heads make installing tongue-and-groove difficult simply from the added bit of obstacle.  So it is with my thoughts, emotions, and spirit when there are bits of vices poking and prodding and prohibiting smooth progress toward, through, with, and in Christ Jesus!)

Ah, this bit of Living Word from Colossians 3 fuels my desires for loving Christ all the more, for striving once again to put on love: the bond of perfection!  There is much I must pray to have altered in my life, though; it will take effort and diligence on my part to practice more and more, the virtues and stave off the vices.

"Brothers and sisters:
Put on, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved,
heartfelt compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience,
bearing with one another and forgiving one another,
if one has a grievance against another;
as the Lord has forgiven you, so must you also do.
And over all these put on love,
that is, the bond of perfection."

Catholic Hermit: Loving Mercy!

The Lord has been so very good to this old, nothing, consecrated Catholic hermit!  However, after a work-mode bonanza of some needed energy and bits of hermitage progress, the body is feeling increase of pain and depletion.

The Lord remains so loving and merciful, with perks along the way, though.  Yesterday had to drive to civilization for way-past-due truck (named Precious Blood) lube and tune and oil change, and in the wait room was a man who struck up conversation.  He noticed my crucifix and sure enough is Catholic.  Great conversation with a good soul of which he certainly is.  God provides!

Am today just now dressed and trying to get the pained body up and off this mattress to head out to the back side of hermitage to continue caulking up under an overhang.  My angel is with me, and I've had inspiration as to how to rig a scaffold-type effect on some steps so that a ladder can be placed under a section of overhang on each side of a deck, so that the old hermit can reach up to do necessary caulking and eventual trim painting.

Ladder to heaven?  Well, that is a good thought while working today, as best as the body can be pushed to work despite radiating pain causing loads of nausea as well as pain going down legs and into feet.  Ah, it all could be so much worse.

On another loving and merciful note, after Mass on Saturday evening last, some women conversed kindly, and long-story-short, called over a man who right then and there said he'd come help this hermit install the microwave above a range.  When he arrived, he seriously asked if I am trying to live in here as it is.  My, I laughed and said this is on the upswing, for sure!  Yes, am living in here, as is.

While the man did not install the microwave, he will come back to lift it onto a mounting plate once the hermit here gets that work done.  The wonderfully competent and kindly young countertop template man came on Monday morning, and he explained to me how to mount the microwave mounting metal strip, to add some toggle bolts for strength, and noted that part of the support will come from bolting down into the microwave from cabinet above.

Such helpfulness not only from the women and man from the parish as well as the countertop template man--well, it is all very encouraging to the heart, mind, and soul.

Let us all remember just how much a bit of kindness, thoughtfulness, and encouragement can accomplish in those who we encounter either in person or in our thoughts of them.  It takes faith in the latter concept, to consider how kindly thoughts can affect souls all over the world and in the great beyond, of souls continuing on in eternity.

God bless His Real Presence in us!  Little children, let us love one another as Jesus loves us!

Now, to get the body up and out, into physical motion, with the mind and heart and spirit praying love and mercy for all.

Catholic Hermit Praises God for The Nibbler

The little table out by the road upon which this nothing consecrated Catholic hermit places choice, fresh, organic produce is ever a source of lessons and praise.

A few days ago I awoke to a scene out there of smashed, large, ripe tomatoes.  Yes, I'd left some out there as I've done before, as sometimes (often) I cannot get the body physically up off the mattress very early in the morning.  At first I was rather crestfallen, as it was rather destructive, and I thought of the soup base those tomatoes would have made--blended, frozen for winter soups.

However, I then decided it was better to think that some raccoons had gotten them, smashed them.  That was a happier thought than had a passer by done it, for animals are creatures of habit without moral values even if they have temporal souls (while we humans have eternal souls).  [See the section in The Catechism of the Catholic Church on "souls", as St. Thomas Aquinas did masterful writing and had great insights, well-thought out, on the topic of plant and animal, and human, souls.]

Then, over the past week or so, there has developed a situation at the roadside table in which I place out gorgeous, mounded quarts of berries and tomatoes (cherry-size plus some small plum-size beauties).  When I'd go out to check if there needed to be more produce and to collect any contributions, I discovered a "nibbler" had been there.  Quarts were nibbled down halfway--not all but one or two or so.

Well, this was rather discouraging, for I strive to provide "omnia pro Deo"--all for God and my best for God for others even in quarts of produce.  I like it to be bounteous and beautiful, fresh-picked, and sumptuous-tasting.  So if quarts are nibbled down and I do not catch it, some other passer-by may not get the full benefit of bounty and generosity.  

(I never suggest donation amounts for I am striving to detach and totally let God provide.  People may or may not contribute, and I learn to see my own reactions and accept if there is nothing or something, little or much.  It works well this way for my spiritual progress as well as to see how greatly God provides, helps me pay the water bill, compost cost, seeds and plant start costs, and this summer left over to pay my medical bills that popped up unexpectedly.)

So when I first noticed The Nibbler's effects, I was a bit discouraged and put out, frankly.  I considered a small sign at the table saying that if one is hungry or cannot contribute, that is all right--to just take the quart and enjoy it!  But then I decided to wait to see if it would continue.  

It did.  The Nibbler (or perhaps there are more than one nibblers) continued to snack, nibbling down quarts part-way--but also began leaving contributions for the snack.  I figure The Nibbler may be a hiker or cyclist who enjoys the refreshment and wholesome energy boost, en route.  There is nothing remotely nearby, otherwise, to get anything to eat or drink.

And I started to notice that The Nibbler began to leave contributions for the half-quart of snacking.  And I noticed that the contributions were more than generous--plus, if I'd get my head and heart turned Godward, I could see how masterful the Master in making me do more walking and picking to fill up the quarts and return them to the roadside table.  The contributions tend to me more than what i could hope for in a full quart contribution from generous passers-by.

I make out very well, particularly in learning to appreciate The Nibbler for providing me with yet another lesson in perspective and in turning all to God in the positive ways of goodness and fruitfulness that God always provides if we see it His way.  Someone gets a delicious snack along his or her route; I get more exercise and stretching in walking and bending, picking, and replacing; and I also get, most of the time, probably more a tangible contribution than had a person taken the full quart.  

(Sometimes people leave nothing or very little; and my perspective on that is learning the positive of detachment, trust, appreciation and the reminder that all this is God's creation and effort, even down to the energy and ability for me to plant, water, and pick.)  

Definitely, I can praise God for The Nibbler.  I see that I am by far the beneficiary of all good in this effort of a little roadside table and offering fresh, organic produce which depends upon what has grown, ripened, and people desire.  The crows twice got the corn plantings before I realized they were the sneaky culprits. 

I learned about "row covers", and now I'm awaiting with hope, if the weather holds, some corn beyond the 8 ears thus far that the crows did not snatch early on of the plantings.  Yet, a raccoon or two has become "nibblers", and I am dealing with them in a man v. nature mode.  The bird-netting for the berries had a brown rat in it the other day, and I apologized to the rat but explained I was not a saint and thus did not quite have it in me at this phase of my spiritual development, to reach in and try to untangle it.  

I prayed and asked the Lord to ease it from this life peacefully, as the critter was toward the end of its struggle when I happened upon it.  The next morning, some other creature had enjoyed sustenance; the rat had been disposed of, probably in a hawks maw and stomach.  I shared this experience with the grandson who called this morning.  He, age 9, informed me of the scientific term and concept:  nature's food chain.

Praise God for The Nibblers, human and creaturely!  Praise God for bounteous produce, for all He gives us to eat and share, and for generous contributors in our daily lives.  God provides!