Catholic Hermit, God's Hermit: Joan of Arc; Still Simmering

Writing is such an integral part of my existence, including pain management.  The pain requires "activity" of sorts to help distract, but the pain also needs lots of rest; so the body needs to take many breaks and sometimes is in bed for days or mostly in bed over weeks, or now it's been over a year.  The type of pain over a year ago had more to do with the spinal cord increasingly being pinched off--nearly totally, plus the other nerves impeded and a disintegrated vertebra and bone spurs a' plenty.  All that is repaired, but the pain post surgery has more to do with the Adhesive Arachnoiditis.

So it goes.  Ordered some better quality B-complex that the pain doctor had told me would absorb best in the system.  B-complex plus separate, added B-12 helps with pain, as does Vitamin D in far more amounts than a non-pained body.  But I had some less-absorptive B-Complex here in Solus Deus Hermitage, and I like to be thrifty.  I decided to use up what I have before re-ordering the B-complex methylcobalamin. 

But I woke up this morning with the thought (brought by my angel or Holy Spirit or some caring being from the other side) in my mind of what might help the bodily fatigue and added pain.  I also took an iron supplement and am trying to drink more water as well as with plant protein powder.  I tend to not eat much as the body seems not to require much food, am more vegan than not--although I have no particular reason.  I prefer vegetables, fruits, nuts, legumes, grains; but I'm not rigid against eating meat or fish.  Regardless, it will take a month, perhaps, to notice improvement if some of this draining pain and fatigue is helped by the methylcobalamin form of B-complex.  

And yes, I praise God for being able to purchase vitamins and supplements of various types, and healthy food which tends toward a diet that is non-inflammatory type.  As I have quipped in the past and it serves a very good purpose and with some humor as I age:  We do our best with what we've got left!

Today is the 100th Anniversary of St. Joan of Arc's canonization on May 16, 1920.  Pope Benedict XVI  described her trial in May of 1431 as "a distressing page in the history of holiness and also an illuminating page on the mystery of the Church which, according to the words of the Second Vatican Council, is 'at once holy and always in need of purification' (Lumen Gentium, n. 8)."  

At the time of the trial the Catholic clerics had their minds made up to burn her at the stake in Rouen's [France] marketplace.  They were opposed to her politically as well as found her mystical gifts unnerving.  She died by fire on the morning of May 30, repeating the Holy Name of Jesus as her soul left her 19-year-old body.

In 2011, Pope Benedict XVI said of St. Joan, "...the Name of Jesus, invoked by our Saint until the very last moments of her earthly life was like the continuous breathing of her soul, like the beating of her heart, the centre of her whole life...with her luminous witness St. Joan of Arc invites us to a high standard of Christian living:  to make prayer the guiding motive of our days; to have full trust in doing God's will, whatever it may be; to live charity without favouritism, without limits and drawing, like her, from the love of Jesus a profound love for the Church."

I so love Jeanne d'Arc!  This morning I listened to Leonard Cohen's creation of the song in her honor, sung as a duet with Jennifer Warnes, including creative juxtaposition of art representative of the saint.  [link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gtwUyDPXROQ].  In fact, I've been praying, asking Joan of Arc to help me find God's will and way for my embarkation to the New Direction.  She is answering my request, helping me today.

While the ingredients, per se, of the New Direction remain on "simmer", ideas are solidifying in the metaphoric slow-cooker.  Back up a day.  Yesterday I had a lengthy conversation with Dr. H.  I caught him up-to-date as best I could, on the CL603 dilemma I faced with the increasing lack of peace of the Holy Spirit that God willed what He had not desired for 20 years.  I'd answered in writing the questions had been asked.  But the major aspect for me personally, was the looming interview with a non-cleric that would be most difficult to avoid aspects of my inner life, my mystical experiences.  The lack of inner peace grew.

Thus, Fr. V. emailed and suggested I email the bishop and explain--share my "story" with him so that he might understand my spiritual predicament as well as the conviction and vision/locution and other reasons why all these years, living the hermit vocation without public profession or as a diocese hermit, seemed God's will and also was best for hidden life other than my anonymous writing.  Then, Fr. V. said, if the bishop approved of my living the vocation as I had been, or if not, I was to simply go forth living the hermit life God had chosen for me, and live it as a fulfilled hermit.

It took a day to absorb the bishop's response.  I repeated in my words in an email to the chancellor, to see if I was grasping the bishop's email to me.  Yes, I had grasped it, the chancellor replied to my encapsulation, to wit:  "I think I am grasping what Bishop means.  A canon law does not seem to be necessary; it does not validate a vocation.  It is but an official recognition, of which I do not need.  I must simply keep on living the life to which God has called me. "

However, there remains the turning point, the major shift in life phase that I've been sensing with increasing magnitude and inner energy--if not some inner angst. Through the trial, of sorts, of build up of canon law approval process and the growing certitude within that God wanted me to in essence choose Him over the CL603 "official" recognition, I was taken through a desert all its own, of great sense of loss and abandonment.  

I am brought to face the reality that I did not sense, do not--with increasing means over the 25 years of God's gradually removing me--fit in with the temporal Catholic world and not in parishes, per se.  This is difficult to explain, for yes, I am part of the Body of Christ, but my purpose and mission involves the mystical realm, and the Lord has been showing me by His withdrawing me in more temporal, tangible ways over time--despite my lack of cooperation.  Yet through various efforts all very good, of my offering my temporal gifts and talents to the temporal aspects of parishes and Church, the Lord always pulled me out although sometimes allowed what I'd offered to remain and continue in the corporal and spiritual works of mercy organized and developed.  

But sometimes not; in many instances the Lord allowed the efforts to dissolve, which I could not understand the why, which added to the upset.  Yet I would continue on, trying yet again, until the Lord had my angel show me to the Stairway to Heaven.  The mystical ecstasy during Masses began and remained no matter prayer nor temporal efforts, for the mystical phenomenon to stop.

Yesterday Dr. H. asked me why I'd be wanting to develop, organize, lead or set up others to lead various good works in parishes or dioceses, when I had this inner life and also was called to the hermit vocation?  I explained that I felt guilty, of sorts, that God had given me gifts and talents, educational background and skills, and I kept thinking it was wrong for me not to offer myself in that way to the temporal Church.  

Indeed, in one major instance that the Virgin Mary came to me in a dream and instructed me in a major outreach I was to organize and lead--and also in a couple of miraculous grants bringing huge sums of money to a parish school and soup kitchen--those kept going even though the Lord plucked me out.  Was a terribly painful episode.  I have not understood other than a penance.  Was soon after that the Lord made it known to me that He chose for me the hermit vocation--a vocation that I'd not have ever chosen for myself nor even knew much about at the time.  

Yet as I write this now, I get it!  For the first time in all these years, I realize the chronology: the soup kitchen the Virgin Mary had me develop and the grants written were prior to my hermit profession and vow; the other efforts afterward when I left the hometown and was called to a city, I was then in my  hermit life.  And while I had some assignments for God that I had to complete which brought their own trials and sufferings, the offerings in organizing and developing what would otherwise be excellent for parishes and the diocese--were oddly not allowed to flourish--and I emphasize oddly.  There is no other logical explanation why my efforts in offering temporal gifts, talents, education did not flourish after being developed, and not even being able to be a lector or a sacristan lasted when the mystical ecstasies at Mass began.  

God was enforcing and forming my hermit life; and He also was trying to get me to understand that I did not belong to that world.  I was shown that, told it in locutions, and also told it in temporal ways.  I literally had priests tell me as such; one listed very positive things of me, but said I could not come to his parish because a mystic like me--the parishioners would crucify me, and he'd not be able to stop them.

Then I moved to a location in which there was one small parish, and the priest was most uncomfortable with my presence; and the state at Mass was as if I'd be chained in hell.  My (late) spiritual father told me not to go--to have spiritual communion in my hermitage.  Then a new priest came a two years later, but he did not want me at Mass due to the mystical state.  So I remained away and had spiritual communion until finally that priest had a couple bring Communion on Sundays when they were able.

Up to the past year and a half in this diocese.  The Lord brought me here due to temporal aspects: financial feasibility, better climate for pain situation, pain doctor, and excellent surgeon (as it turns out desperately needed spine surgery).  The parish priest wanted me to be at Mass but with needed caution, in a day chapel; but even being at Mass has not been for a long time due to the spine surgery, and now COVID-19: older adults are to not come to Mass until further notice, potentially not until a vaccine is available.

And all this back history helps me in facing what God has been trying for a long earth-time, to get me to grasp.  I truly need to stop stressing and freaking out over what did not make sense to me, or seemed surely not right.  I truly do not belong in the temporal Catholic world, not in the parishes, not in religious orders, and not as a specific CL603 hermit.  But I do belong in His Church; I do have a "place" in the Church.  I belong in the mystical Catholic world; I am to be a Catholic hermit but no need to be officially recognized as the canon law does not validate the vocation, anyway.  God validates the vocation by His choosing and how one lives it.  My "place" is in the mystical Church and as a mystic, which leads me to the embarkation in the New Direction. 

There is a growing peace of understanding, of my letting go of that which I have not understood as to why I was to let go.  It would be difficult for more temporally-utilized souls to grasp, for even I could not "see" why or how God would not want what seems so good, why I was prohibited one way or another or several.  Even now, it is irrefutable, even down to the bishop's email which was such good news I could not comprehend what he was saying for a day.  Needed to go over it and asked Fr. V. to go over it to help me understand if this means I can be what God chose for me--a Catholic hermit but in the way He wills.  It makes much sense, of course, that the canon law recognized and diocese hermit in a parish would not be advisable or helpful to church or to mystic hermit.

And that is where the Lord has been leading me today in clearer understanding of the New Direction.  It is actually where He's had me for some time--really since my angel told me I was being taken to the Stairway to Heaven shortly before the ecstasies during Masses began.  I was being taken out of the temporal Catholic world, in essence as well as increasingly in tangible, practical, physicality.  Even the canon law aspect for a hermit is suited for non-mystic, more temporal Catholic world persons.  Perhaps that is even why the CL603 hermit who also writes of hermit life regularly, has been at odds with my Catholic hermit vocation and how God unfolds it, as well as my writing.

Different brushstrokes by the Master Artist on the same Masterpiece of His One Catholic and Apostolic Church.  But frankly, I have run out of much at all to write about of the hermit vocation.  It is a vehicle, is the vocation, to get  a soul from one point to another in the spiritual journey.  It will be my vehicle for life as I assume it will be for the CL603 hermit/s.  Not often in history has the Lord called a hermit out of the vocation to some other of His purposes. 

And while I've been shown that the CL603 hermit vocation has taken on a different format from the traditional historical hermit vocation, I have nothing more to write of the differences; I've written plenty, and it is not even subject matter that my mind, heart, and soul enjoys. That tells one, in itself, that my choosing what God chose for me as His hermit is best for a mystic soul who would no more fit into the canon law public profession and diocese recognition than I did in leading parish or diocese programs and outreach activities.

I've written much about hermit saints and hermit ways and hermit traditions and history, and hermit writings and wisdoms.  I have written, though, also, of the daily type unfolding of my life as a consecrated Catholic hermit (not CL603 type), and of various other aspects of my spiritual journey which has been from my viewpoint both blessed and chaotic.  But I really have nothing more to write on the hermit vocation "vehicle".   I leave that to others to write-- CL603 in all aspects they desire or on whatever else of hermit vocation.  

Back to yesterday's phone call.  Dr. H. said he'd been thinking about me prior to our phone discussion, as we've known each other for 35 years.  He said, he had to admit, that he would never want to have to live my life.  We laughed.  I wouldn't want it, either; but I've got it, and perhaps it will proceed with fewer--at least external--jolts and lightning bolts in whatever time remains for me on this earth, than the previous years.

But as for a New Direction, yes.  I am getting it, Lord, my mind is getting it; and I am fully, whole-heartedly on board!  Even my soul is eager and thankful and pleased with the New Direction!  My hermit vocation vehicle remains as always, but it is like someone who has been driving a vehicle so long, for years and years, that it is as if driving and the vehicle are second-nature.  There is far more at hand, before me, that God desires of me.  

I see the holy mountain as through the clearing fog.  Who is it that will climb the holy mountain?  The Scriptures describe.  Becoming a sherpa or finding one or several, will be helpful.  I'm embarking in the New Direction.  The plans are still simmering, but nearly cooked and to be served, garnishes to be decided upon.

God bless His Real Presence in us!

Catholic Hermit's Thoughts to Bishop on Mystic Portal

This nothing consecrated Catholic hermit noticed a saved "draft" of an email sent a few years ago to my late Bishop.  These are thoughts that came to me one morning, back then, when pain was severe and the mystical state at Mass opening the soul to insights, very loving and clear.  I recall that Bishop was trying to grasp matters, which he said to me were very hard for him to grasp.

We can certainly understand how mystical experiences and insights can be difficult to grasp when so much of our lives and existences revolve around the temporal goings and doings, especially for a bishop who is responsible for many priests and various diocese employees, as well as ultimate for each person in his diocese, his "flock".  Plus, there are the interactions with other dioceses and bishops, with the general assembly of bishops twice a year, with the Vatican, as well as with the community and city leaders, various board meetings, and visiting schools and parishes, preaching, praying--when there is time if much at all.

I've had another couple of very difficult days of suffering severe pain.  Yesterday I could not think clearly enough to figure out how to install a microwave hanging bracket which needed some toggle bolts!  I've installed it before without a hitch.  So I called Craig at the lumber yard, and he kindly and patiently talked me through how to do it, while on the phone.  He knows my pain issues, and all I had to do was say it was severe and keeping me from being able to think clearly.

After I got the metal hanging strip securely installed and was off the phone, I started to pass out from the pain.  So I got to the mattress here on the floor of my tiny cell room, and realized I needed to take some pain medication.  I did not want to, and I have not for quite awhile now, but there comes a time when there is no other recourse, for safety's sake, at minimum.

This morning I'm resting longer for the back is on what I call "high pain alert."  And thus I ran across this email sent to my late Bishop, back when he was my spiritual director, prior to his grappling with the mystical realities becoming too much for him, and prior to his unexpected death.

I'm re-reading and absorbing the thoughts expressed, for they are appreciated insights given me, and I am reminded of the reality of the mystic portal.

I am living the temporal humanity of Christ.
I bear His temporal pain and breathe His soul's suffering.
But only when the human is subsumed in His mystical Divinity 
is there one Joy, one Love, the one Reality: God.

Only then do the two worlds [temporal and mystical] become one reality, the Divine Reality.
The temporal is a shadow of the full humanity of Christ, without union in the mystical reality of His Divinity.

The temporal Catholic world is a holding cell.  Humans must pass through the mystic portal in order to
come to full humanity of Christ in His Divinity, to then be one in the One in one true reality.

I hope I am stating it meaningfully, accurately; words are incompetent.

It is something like this, and I must get through the mystic portal with His physical and soul suffering, 
in order to be in the true reality, the one reality of oneness in God.

Do you see that the Sacraments, all of them, but most frequently Eucharist in Mass and reconciliation in confession,
are parts of the portal and are passage points for the temporal to enter into the mystical, and that without the One in reality
of the mystical in these sacraments, there would be nothing?  

Jesus in His full humanity is the Divine ever-flowing into within the temporal.  He is not the temporal occasionally touching the mystical.
When we pain-bearing, soul-suffering humans pass through the mystic portal to be subsumed in His Divinity, we awash the temporal
in and by His living waters.  We then may fully live His humanity divine as we have become one with the One Reality.

Holy Door Update

Well, the elderly friend emailed the latest.  The monsignor of their cathedral has once more changed his decision as to which door is to be holy.  They had a ceremony for the holy door, which he ended up changing back to be the doors facing the main thoroughfare, of which the friend adroitly pointed out are actually double doors of which few ever use.

But the ceremony was held; they declined to be in attendance which is wise this time of year considering weather, viruses, night venue, and age.

So two of the doors are now officially holy, and perhaps more technically so because few if any of us unholy humans pass through them.

The exhaustion from physical pain continues here with this hermit.  Today will attempt Chapter 2 of Hebrews, not that what I write will be of interest to anyone but God.  He is always interested in what we are about, what we do, think, speak, feel.

Even if what I write, as I was recently reminded, might be beautifully written and profound, the person informing me also added that it is not what most people grasp.  He mentioned some famous media types who with ghostwriters put out books that people buy and read, as well as they write some children's books.

Of course, the comment was meant to be for me to perhaps try to write something that actual people enjoy reading and can grasp, or that which is pleasing to others including children.

However, while I did write a children's book once and illustrated it, my life has shifted some over the years, and I see through situations with more reality, perhaps, and I seek all the more my purpose for being here in accordance to what God has in Mind.  The pain rivets me to deeper thoughts and to realism.

For example, when I read an article about the current pope a year ago excoriating the clerics in the Vatican curia for having embezzled, taken bribes, been immoral, lived in excess and gluttony--and this year was once more addressing them, but this time trying to get them to learn to be honest and moral, to live a couple of basic virtues--I had to ask myself why are these clerics, some of them having committed criminal acts, still in the curia?  

What is wrong with grown ups who had years ago been gifted with years of paid instruction and formation and then even more years of paid and glorified lived experience--supposed to be sons of God who were anointed with the oil of gladness, given the scepter of righteousness, told to love justice and hate wickedness?  Why are they not out working at some job more suited to their inability to have grasped what is simple honesty, years ago?  

If these alter Christi did not get the message from the pope a year ago, why still be trying to explain to them what is honesty and ask them to try living simple virtues, now?  If they did not grasp the simple definitions of virtues and to live good lives when children growing up in their mostly Catholic homes--taught simple right from wrong--why is the top leader of a major church in the world, still attempting to cajole them into trying on a bit of goodness, yet, a year later?

Would any owner of a dog put up with such disobedience after having trained the animal otherwise as a pup?

I can see how Jesus was perturbed with the high priests, the Sadducees, the Pharisees, the scribes--of the various hypocrisies of the Temple goers and doers.  He turned to the lowly people, then, through preaching and teaching. He knew their neediness as not having viable leaders for their souls.  

He gave His hope to their neediness, at least, and their lostness, their seeking a shepherd to guide them when the ones to whom was given by God the scepter of righteousness had either dropped the scepter or started to use it as a sword to fight for personal power, prestige, position, and possessions.  Or maybe the scepter had poked their eyes out.  Blind shepherds, then, trying to lead lost sheep.

We each and every one of us need to find our God-given purpose in life, our holy point for being here, and to take a realistic view of what it is that God asks of us. We need to grasp the scepter of righteousness even if not ceremonially ordained.  We must pray to be touched in our minds and hearts and souls by His oil of gladness, and to deeply love justice and to resolutely hate wickedness.  We must be noble in our purpose and never let go of what is right; we must listen to and follow Jesus.  Remain in His Love!

The others--those entangled in the nets just beneath the surface--we must let God touch them, deal with them, love and rescue them.  We must swim on out into the deep, not knowing where we are going but going in faith, yet not get entangled ourselves in humanly uncuttable nets.  Just keep swimming toward the depths of His Real Presence.  We must!

Catholic Hermit: Deeper Conversions

Of course, this extended period of physical suffering includes--and perhaps has predominant impetus in--deeper spiritual conversions.

These periods of immense suffering include the accompanying storms and darkness.  The body, mind, heart, and soul are put through the grinder, so to speak.  Or, to stick with weather metaphor--all aspects of body, mind, heart, and soul are buffeted by howling winds, pounded by torrential rains, drought-ridden by desert dryness, immobilized and frozen in icy avalanches.

This period of time here, for my body, mind, heart, and soul--seems as if not weathering this storm.  Yet, it most certainly must be or I'd not be writing about it.

Last evening, when realizing I have no means to do manual labor, and at a deeper sense no work to be done in any active or acceptable, tangible, capacity in the temporal Catholic Church--and facing the unknowing of when or if the body would be "doing" much again, at all--an email came.  It is one that I have received the past three years, asking for some St. Bernard Love of God Bourbon Balls.

I realized the Lord was reaching in, saying, "You can do this.  I will let you be able to make these over which you pray and pour love into the efforts."  

Making these small and simple confections are usually without obstacles--nothing like other work efforts or interactions with the temporal world that become marathons of perseverance and endurance.  Other than if the printer is ornery if more labels are needed, the process is something that my body can manage if I make them in phases.  It is so very painful for me to stand in one spot for more than five minutes or even less.  And that is the case even when the back pain is at more manageable levels.

There is nothing else in my life right now that I can actually "do" and have satisfactory completion.  I am still persevering with kitchen and bathroom cabinets, so those rooms cannot be finished until there is resolution with the store and cabinet company representative.  There is nothing else--no other area of life that can be engaged to complete something.

Even all the garden harvest that I processed and froze is ruined.  Somehow, the cord came loose from the outlet when a couple weeks ago--surely must have been then--I struggled with each awkward and heavy bathroom base cabinet, having to get them in from the pole barn to the house.  Yesterday, when I finally was able to walk the short distance to the pole barn, needing a container of frozen food, I discovered all in the freezers had long-since thawed.  There is no meat involved, but the hermit's winter and spring food supply is all but gone.

Can't even empty it out--body not able.

As for what is going on spiritually in this deeper conversion, I've written it to Fr. V. in Nigeria and to a long-time friend, not Catholic, but who reads without comment, and prays.  Fr. V. is unlikely to respond with comment other than to remind to pray and remain in Christ's love.  Yet, it serves a purpose to express the depths of thoughts, insights, and conclusions when the storms are ravaging the outer and inner earth of our beings.

I am considering on a deeper level such great and successfully spiritual souls as Bruno the Carthusian, John of the Cross, and Joseph Benedict LeBre.  Their times of deeper conversions give great insight into those called to a different type of temporal life, a deeper call to live in the spiritual realm while their bodies existed in the temporal world.  Even with John of the Cross, his mind, heart, and soul went to another "place" although living amidst his fellow Carmelite religious brothers.  

He wrote his great insights and poetry more toward the beginning of his adult life as a consecrated religious and priest.  In the very few years between his imprisonment and torture by his fellow priests and monks and his final years of persecution again by his fellow religious, John had brief cohesion of active life utilization of his body, mind, heart, and spirit as spiritual director to Teresa of Avila's religious sisters in the several foundations she made of reformed Carmelites.

Bruno had more temporal Catholic world utilization at the beginning of his priesthood but extending some years when he was priest and professor in Cologne, Germany.  His departure from the temporal Catholic world was a decisive separation although previously had been an agreed-upon goal between himself and five or six friends--some of them priests.  They had resolved to leave that world and seek union in God without the temporal distractions and the laws of minds that can cause all kinds of obstacles to the "climb up the holy mountain.".  

And leave they did, and up the highest mountain they could find in the farthest reaches of the French Alps. Bruno was only called back to the temporal Catholic world once after that, by a pope.  He assisted for a short time although the pope wanted him to remain longer in his service.  But Bruno left for another foundation of similarly-minded men (again, some of them priests and others not) that later became also a monastery known as part of the Carthusian order.  Bruno died there.  

He did not formally "found" the order himself.  No, he simply (but I am sure with many dyings to self along the way) lived the ideals and in the way he thought was most helpful in climbing the holy mountain, to live spiritually the Christian ideal for achieving Divine Union and living the law of God.  He did not write down any laws of mind; he lived in whatever way he sensed could be successful in the repeated deeper conversions which would reach the spiritual summit.

Joseph Benedict LeBre sought entrance to numerous religious orders.  He was allowed entrance into several, often with much reservation on the parts of abbots and priors.  He never lasted long; they were concerned about what they perceived as his potential to be ill, and a couple superiors sent him on his way due to his becoming ill.  In other monastic attempts, he was considered to be at cross-ends with the goals and efforts of the monks themselves. Joseph's focused and desirous seeking of the spiritual realm and of God did not fit in.  Out he went.

Joseph had his mind, heart, and soul set on the spiritual heights.  Yes, he was crushed repeatedly when sent away from the various religious houses.  But that led him to a time of deeper conversion in which he realized he was called to live the life of a "pilgrim."  He determined to follow Jesus directly, without the ways and means or laws of minds involved in religious orders or other designated vocations.  He wandered for a couple of years or so in France before sensing within a strong calling to walk to Rome.  

Joseph LeBre wandered, walked, lived, and prayed as Jesus did in His life ministry.  He never encountered his family again.  Even in Rome, he lived as a pilgrim--not taking upon himself label of hermit or religious solitary or anything other vocational title.  Today he would be likened to a hobo or a homeless person; in Rome, those who noticed him at first considered him a filthy vagrant.  He died in the odor of sanctity, on a street, although a priest convinced him to live in his rectory for awhile, living there along with a few other homeless men the priest took in--worn out and ill from their ages, poverty, and harsh living conditions.

These three examples, have roosted in my mind this past day, as they have off and on for several years.  As such, these three souls (on earth known as saintly men) assist me in the deeper conversion occurring.  Such conversions are unlikely to provide much progress or success if the body is not incapacitated from all activity and distractions.  Thus, while difficult to be rid of current temporal distractions due to the pain and the mind's concerns about how will the work progress in this hermitage, how will I be able to do the heavier work once the family leaves the area--a prolonged, incapacitating pain siege allows for that self-concern mindset to pass.

Then the eye of the storm occurs in which the temporal worries and questions and thoughts of even past persecutions or whatever else, are stilled and silenced.  That is when His Real Presence shines the light on the deeper conversion and upon the decisions and acceptances that are to be made if one is willing.  If not, there will be yet more storms and then eyes of the storms with their opportunities for deeper conversions.

The three men have been in the beam of Christ's light in this day of the eye of this storm.  Even though the body could get up and move about a bit more, the pain is enough to remand: lay low, be still.  And, there is now the recognition of the storm's purpose, the pain siege's "inner eye."  The mind and heart want to pursue the deepening and to be given, in the soul's "eye," the insights and courage required to venture forth and through the other side of this storm.

These three men's life examples of following Jesus in His life and teachings and in the law of God, are with me as companions--as storm chasers, I guess we could say.  We don't need to fall victim to storms but rather to see them as they are--natural events brought and allowed by God--and to enter into them knowing that in the storm's eye are the deeper conversions of greater Christ-clarity, of spiritual progression, and hold the graces we carry with us when we pass through them.

God bless His Real Presence in us!  Little children, let us love God above all things and love one another as ourselves!

Catholic Hermit Ponders Living Word

Today's first Scripture reading of Mass is from Ephesians 4.  This hermit is reflecting upon these verses, as they seem to illuminate the hermit's on-going desire to grasp why the mystical ecstasy during any Mass.

"And He gave some as Apostles, others as prophets,
others as evangelists, others as pastors and teachers,
to equip the holy ones for the work of ministry,
for building up the Body of Christ,
until we all attain to the unity of faith
and knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood,
to the extent of the full stature of Christ."

It seems that the Living Word is speaking to all of us, and to this hidden, imperfect, struggling, consecrated Catholic hermit, as a child of God and a Christian, to consider that the mystical ecstasy--a sign of sorts during Mass--is for the purpose of building up the Body of Christ.  Some such as the spiritual father, a late bishop, a noted clinical psychologist, and other Christians, have called it a gift.

Gifts are graces given by His Real Presence in order to, yes, build up the Body of Christ.  They build up the person experiencing the grace; but they also and perhaps more so are intended so that others are built up in Christ.  Why and for what purpose?  So that we all attain to the unity of faith and knowledge of the Son of God--to our mature manhood, to the extent of the full stature of Christ.

That is what we are to seek and to attain in our temporal and spiritual lives.  As for how a mystical ecstasy might help build up the Body of Christ, it does signal the power of the Mass and very much is a reminder that there is far more to our world and existences than the temporal aspects of daily life, of our being alive, in interactions, and perhaps especially in the temporal aspects of the Church.  

There, in the Mass we discover the stairway to heaven.  We find the ever-breathing, pulsing, live encounter in His Real Presence in all of this life and especially in the celebration of the Mass.  There, in the true presence of His Real Presence, we are to pass through from the temporal and tangible to the spiritual and mystical encounter with and be subsumed into His Real Presence in the eternal, mystical reality.

We each are given graces, gifts. Most will not have mystical ecstasies in our lifetimes.  Most will have graces more tangible to the vast temporal world in which we live; but that is not to discount the value of the mystical reality and existence of the spiritual realm of which, once we leave this temporal world physically, will become a "world" and existence fully and totally mystical reality. 

Let us avail ourselves to be conduits for our God-bequeathed, God-breathed graces, these gifts, to be used to build up the Body of Christ and to bring all of us to mature manhood to the extent of the full stature of Christ.

God bless His Real Presence in us!  Little children, let us love one another as we love God, for God Is Love!