Christian Catholic Mystic Hermit: Present Moment Necessary Reminder of Past Vision and Locution

 

I've been considering more, my existence from earliest memories.  Many of those are clear and sharp, but as an adult so much life has been lived that the present moment is prominent and the past details other than major ones of spiritual import--of the Persons of the Trinity and also some generated and involving the Devil--are faded unless reminded from journals or otherwise.  And, in adult life so many visions and other mystical experiences have occurred that other than in the present moment or major events, the others are remembered when His Real Presence brings them to the moment or I happen upon even an long-past blog that in some aspects became the journaling mode.

I noticed some persons had read, in blogspot's statistics, a blog from long ago.  I read what I'd written--and the entire noticing and nudge to read I consider the Holy Spirit's action upon my mind to do so, after a concerning realization yesterday when a lovely woman inited me and the pup Mercy to come to her home in same subdivision, to play with her two dogs Jack and Cammie.  While the dogs payed, the woman and I had a cup of tea, and got to know one another, with her asking questions more than I, but with my doing my usual in situations, that of encouraging and uplifting the other, genuinely.

I came away, however, with the distinct concern that I have lost an ability which perhaps for years or ever I possessed:  that of fitting in with persons who are very comfortable and thriving in the temporal world.  And the reality is that I have not other than with great effort, and even then not so successfully, or else as being older (old!) now, I do not have the energy to put on a temporal face, so to speak, but yet still try with what I consider to be unsuccessful results.  This is my assessment, anyway, and automatically all is shared with His Real Presence within me, and me within Him.

So this morning I happened to notice the statistical information which I do not often bother with, and there was that old blog that some few had read evidently yesterday or during the night.  When I read it, I was comforted, for it related back in summer of 2008 prior to my angel appearing and leading me to the stairway to heaven in a vision, that I somehow had been in similar sense that I was yesterday, recognizing that try as I might, I had botched some attempt to relate, in my estimation, that well with the temporal world.  The blog revealed, and then I recalled it--that I'd had a waking vision as I was in my concerns.  An ancient hermit had appeared and said simply and firmly:  Remember, you are a HERMIT~!"  

There was more to that blog, including my thoughts of yearning to be on the stairway to heaven and on my way out of this existence, my longing to be with His Real Presence in eternity of Heaven.  Those heartfelt yearnings I had totally forgotten even in the month later when the wish was granted, at least as a beginning, as in August in a major vision and locution that I have not forgotten, my angel led me to the stairway to heaven, took me by the right forearm and literally, physically in that surreal dimension, led me to the base of that vast stairway that seemed to ascend infinitely, narrowing as it went higher to where my eyes even in vision could not see.

Even at the time of that vision, and I do recall that vision with such clarity today, I had not remembered that the previous month I'd yearned to be on the stairway to heaven.  I likely had forgotten the ancient hermit standing off to the side of my peripheral vision, telling me to remember that I am a hermit--and thus, of course, to understand why I would have the feelings and notice my awkwardness of sorts, or the effort it took to fit in and interact with the temporal.  I was not destined for the temporal world of work and activity and normal interpersonal relationships of a temporal nature, but of the ones and missions that His Real Presence chose for me.  

These included my children and grandchildren to the extent that my then adult children desired, of course.  Even now, I need to remind myself that my own intrusions and pushing is not what they want; rather, to be for them if and when and how they want.  They are busy with their families and careers, their friends and activities!  They are taking in big gulps of the air of their responsibilities and vocations, their callings, all of which are temporally deemed.  I rejoice in this!

But today I have been refreshed, reassured, and renewed by His Real Presence reminding me through a blog of nearly 16 years ago, and an ancient hermit--now I recall it clearly, in desert father type garment of flowing tunic, off-white to light beige with age and soil, long beard, mostly white, distinctly had been a real person--nothing fantastical about him other than the fact that he was now from the past and came as a corporeal form, in vision, with his verbalized message, loud and clear.

I am again reminded that I am a hermit!  I must not let my feelings of how the interaction yesterday felt to me.  Feelings can be misleading, not the reality.  The woman sandwiched the visit for less than an hour in between her meetings; she sells jewelry in home parties and with Covid, more often giving presentations to people at their workplaces.  She feels a calling to empower women, including the jewelry sales which she does not create nor make herself but is a line of jewelry made by a company of which the sales are through the home sales model.  But her desire to help women feel confident and to know that if they want, they can do anything.  

(Of course, that is relative, for we as Christians also know that much or all is dependent upon if God wills; and I say "much" because sometimes God wills to allow us to try what we want, so that we learn by failure that this or that desire is not His will for us.  And that, for those who look to God in belief, faith, hope, and love.  I do believe that in general, save if one is called to the temporal, active life, God allows and the person him- or herself finds what their God given gifts and their own desires bring success.)

The sense of my disappointment or feeling of failing to connect as well as I would have liked with the woman, is now put far from me because the Holy Spirit reminded me, or perhaps that ancient hermit did without having to appear in vision, since years ago I also said I would try more to be aware so that they did not have to go to the effort and use energy to whirr down to our temporal level, and to appear in corporeal form.  Instead, this time I was nudged to notice the statistics of blogs read yesterday and in the night, and noticed this one from July of 2008 as one of the top read posts for March 29, 2022!  

Therein was what I needed to be reminded, and to hopefully not forget for awhile, and to settle down in my eremitic vocation without wasting emotions and thought or even added effort for developing other than a kindly encouragement and relating with someone whose purpose might actually be God's will for our dogs to play with one another on occasion.  The woman and her husband's "Jack" is a playful three-year-old and their "Cammie" a 13-year-old dog who at her age does not want to play with Jack.  Mercy was more than happy to oblige as a frolicking 6-month-old pup!

And in the night I had a bilocation experience involving women at a workplace somewhere that I obviously did not need to know, but in the United States for the language spoken among the woman and my own self asking some questions and making some comments needed to be made per God's will, is our language, and the time period seemed to be in the latter 20th c. or even could be in our own time.  However, it seems to me that it might have been such as in the '60's or '70's based on the building and the women's appearances, plus a male boss.  I had a purpose for being there and by asking some questions and verbalizing some observations, fulfilled the mission God gave me to open their awareness of their situation.  

That was all, and nothing spectacular as sometimes it seems people think that bilocation is some stupendous event as when German and American fighter pilots in WWII saw a monk in brown habit up in the sky, arms outstretched, which caused the German planes from continuing on in their attack against the American planes. All soldiers were amazed and stunned, and the Germans turned and flew off.  Several of the soldiers in the planes, including a pilot, found out who it might have been, for they could not believe their eyes other than they all saw that friar in the sky--a miracle!  They then asked about when they landed, as it was in Italy, and were told of Padre Pio, the miracle worker of San Giovanni Rotundo.  At least one of them (likely others) then went there when on leave, saw Padre Pio, and validated that indeed was the friar of the skies.

Most bilocations are simple missions which come and go, the words spoken, the suggestions and questions relayed to the persons or person of which God wants the interchange for His will and purposes--always to help in love, others, for their good.  I do not know in advance; I do not ask for any of it other than we all pray for God to use as He wills and desires.  Most are utilized in the temporal world in temporal interchanges with others, and I try to be cooperative with God's will in these aspects, also But I must not be discouraged or think anything of it when I recognize I am not in the temporal world to be as a "natural" with temporal relationships and really ever was; my purpose and mission God wants of me has more to do with the spiritual, of which yesterday I did bring up in subtle ways, but not anything overt because our purposes and predominant "worlds" are different by virtue of our vocations and God's utilization of each of us. 

I will do best to pray for the lovely woman and her husband, to be successful in their loving relationships of the persons they interact with in their temporal work and desires, bringing good, as I hopefully do and will do, but in different venues and modalities.  Likely the awkwardness was mine, not the woman's.  I certainly had more suffering from the padded chairs upon which we sat; no wood chairs did I see in the living area.  One learns to not fuss in a one-off visit!  Smile through and distract with chat and trying to listen.  And admittedly, I'd not had an in  For I must remember:  I am a hermit and the aspects God has chosen for me such as mystic and Christian, Catholic, and his child who needs to learn to love  to love as God loves.

In this instance, the reminder and the label "hermit" did help me understand yet again the awkwardness I felt and for obvious reasons in what God wills and wants of me in this life.  That was a brief exchange and encouragement of the woman's good efforts and desires, and a wonderful and fun chance for the pup Mercy the Goldendoodle mini to have a playdate with Jack the black Lab and a little with Cammie, also a black Lab.

Catholic Hermit: Pray for Easter Miracle

Today, on this Solemnity of the Annunciation of Angel Gabriel to the Virgin Mary, our hearts and minds continue to be in prayer regarding the COVID-19 pandemic sweeping our country here in the USA as well as afflicting people of all ages, all over the world.  

There are various prayers and novenas in circulation.  This morning I received a text requesting I pray the Lord's Prayer (the Our Father) as someone has begun a chain of asking people to pray this prayer that Jesus taught his disciples and all of us over the centuries--to pray it for the end to the coronavirus pandemic.  I'm all in for all and any prayers; I do remind people that our inner feelings and thoughts, our emotions, are also prayers as well as can be praise of God. 

Two brief prayers I've always admired and loved come from two saints of the 20th century.  Padre Pio tended to tell people who had concerns and trials, "Pray, hope, and don't worry."  Bl. Solanus Casey would advise, "Thank God ahead of time."  Today I found myself simply asking aloud or more often within myself "say", "Mary, please comfort your children;" and, "Mary, we love you and ask your intercessions in this time of crisis."

Then Randy from Home Depot called to remind me that the promotion for the window and door order will be over on Sunday.  Was I still wanting to add the flooring to it for him to try to get a better discount from the Pro Desk?  I decided to pivot from news and praying, from wondering how family and friends are coping, from thinking that I seem not to be praying well enough or enough at all.  

I switched gears to add up already-measured room dimensions, look up flooring product and the added pieces like stair nose and doorway transitions pieces, write the model numbers, special order sku numbers, make a few other decisions, research bath tubs to find one for the St. John the Baptist bathroom upstairs.  I called the store a couple times to ask some questions of flooring and plumbing personnel, got an email address from Randy, and typed up the specifics of the order.  Friday we will finalize it, and he will find out from Pro Desk if there is a greater percentage off than just the door/window promotion.

Feeling conflicted about moving forward with temporal aspects of gathering materials for eventual projects, I realized that life will go on.  If something occurs with me, someone will need to do a few things to this dwelling in order to make it more salable, if they choose financial prudence.  Otherwise, I will get the old carpet out, bit by bit when I improve in health (still sick from upper respiratory infection, but gradually improving).  The old carpet or any carpet at all is not helping the lungs.  I considered that my placing an order, although I will take advantage of a 24-month minimum payment, no interest store offering, my purchase will help the economy with a vote of confidence; and in two years the full amount will be paid by me or my estate. 

Most of all, I am letting the Lord know, as well as a Home Depot employee, that I have positivity and have faith that He will pull us through this global health crisis that is becoming an economic crisis for countries and the human beings who live in these countries and continents of the world.  How I react and view and express my faith will be one witness of many of those who remain steadfast and positive, hopeful in God's providence.  Some of us will pass away from COVID-19, but we all are going to pass from this life from something, sometime.  While alive, especially a consecrated Catholic hermit must be a silent preaching of Christ and a witness of the mystery of Christ and His Church--the Body of Christ.

The distraction is finished and has been for a few hours. But the prayer that is becoming most frequent and returns to my conscious thoughts is that of delight in that of an Easter miracle! I love that goal our U.S. President has suggested--not that it is a definite date, but is just something he feels within that would be a wonderful day for at least some sections of the country to perhaps be able to open up again with signs of more active life.

Easter is the day mentioned as a hopeful goal--a special day to the President and to many people.  Yes, indeed, how special a day is Easter to all Christians. To Catholics who are intently living out this Lent as none other in most of our lifetimes, the trial of COVID-19 a global crisis, we feel the unity of the Body of Christ with those around the world awaiting the celebration of Christ's resurrection on Easter!  

May we see the coronavirus image that we all by now are familiar with, in a different way and light.  (Coronavirus is so named because it is shaped like and appears under a microscope to be like a crown.)  Let us not see a virus crown but rather see the crown of our Lord Jesus Christ--a crown of suffering that became a crown of victory over our sins and death by Christ's saving our souls by His own death on the Cross.

So I've been praying with increasing repetition in the joyous conviction of how wonderful if the Lord would provide an Easter miracle of returning health to God's children all over the world!  I'm praying for an Easter Miracle the likes of which we have not witnessed for decades if not longer.  Even if there are regional miracles on Easter with the coronavirus scourge abating, what great signs of Christ's being with us and interacting, intervening, in this most terrible time of serious, viral pandemic.

The first reading from today's Mass--this Solemnity of the Annunciation of the Angel Gabriel to the Blessed Virgin Mary--convinces me all the more of the faith and hope in God that I pray will and is already in the minds and hearts of many Christians around the world:  An Easter Miracle of Christ's Resurrection and a lifting up and away of the coronavirus pandemic! 

"The LORD spoke to Ahaz, saying:
Ask for a sign from the LORD, your God; 
let it be deep as the nether world, or high as the sky!
But Ahaz answered, 'I will not ask!  I will not tempt the LORD!'
Then he said:  Listen, O house of David!  Is it not enough 
for you to weary men, must you also weary my God?
Therefore the Lord himself will give you this sign:
the virgin shall be with child, and bear a son,
and shall name him Emmanuel,
which means 'God is with us!'"
                                 
                          ~ Isaiah 7:10-14, 8, 10b 

Let us ask a sign from the LORD, our God--deep as the nether world, or high as the sky!  Let us ask the LORD our God, Jesus Christ His Son, and the Holy Spirit, with the intercessions of the Blessed Virgin Mary and all the angels and the saints, to grant us an Easter Miracle along with Christ's Resurrection and the salvation of our souls.  God is with us!

May it be a sign of the LORD, also, if it be His will, may God lift the coronavirus from the world and heal those afflicted by it.  And may we all as a sign of our faith, hope, and love of God, return to God with all our bodies, minds, hearts, and souls.

God bless His Real Presence in us!  And thank you, LORD, ahead of time.

Catholic Hermit: Padre Pio on Humility

Have always had a special place in my heart and mind for Padre Pio.  Many reasons but mainly just because somehow I do and have, ever since my conversion to the Church years ago.  Am yet amazed that as a Protestant prior, I never had any clue of these marvelous saints, particularly Padre Pio due to the photographs and films and the news of his life and passing--and obviously, the miracle of his stigmata.

I've collected and read much of what he's written including his letters up to the last volume printed, and what is translated into English.  But the following, taken from Buona Giornata, p.21, I don't recall as not in my hermitage library.  I particularly notice his point of recognizing we are, first of his list of descriptions:  nothing.

 "It is of capital importance that you emphasize what is the basis for holiness and the foundation of goodness.  I mean, to talk about the virtue of which Jesus presents himself explicitly as the model:  humility (cf. Mt 11:29*).  Inner humility, more inner than outward.  

"Recognize who you truly are:  a nothing, something quite miserable, weak, full of defects, capable of turning good into bad, to let go the good for the bad, to attribute to yourself the good, and to justify yourself in doing bad, and for love of evil, to despise the One who is the Supreme Good. 

"Never go to bed before having first examined your conscience to consider how you spent your day.  Turn all your thoughts towards the Lord and consecrate to Him your own person as well as all Christians.  Then offer to His glory the sleep you will get, without ever forgetting your guardian angel, who is always at your side."

 This is, also, pertinent and wise guidance for all of us the world over, in our on-going struggle and enduring attempts to STOP THE SPREAD of COVID-19.  

We will need to follow these guidelines and change our way of interacting going forward.  Be considerate of others, wash hands more than we ever dreamed necessary, not shake hands, wash our clothes more often, wash our fruits and vegetables, disinfect store-bought items.  We must now and in future not go out or to work when we have a cold or light case of flu--something many people did without thinking twice about it in the past.

And above all, we all really do need to return to God, or in some cases turn to God when never have prior.  COVID-19 is a call for change.  We are being asked and in many ways forced by God's will and allowing, and the consequences of our actions and mis-actions:  CONVERSION and DEEPER CONVERSION.   

We are showing by our behaviors in this very time period of a couple or three weeks, our characters, our vices, and our virtues.  It does seem woefully obvious that our country and our world are showing a conflict between those with virtues and those with vices.  Globally, we are yet to discover if the virtuous will be greater and more effective in outcomes than those attached to vices.  We are being given an opportunity to discern character of ourselves and of others.  May we do so with honesty and self-truth and reality.

God bless His Real Presence in us!

* Matthew 11:29:  "Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and YOU WILL FIND REST FOR YOUR SOULS."

God's Hermit: Unseen Affirmations in Christ and His Saints

Last night my time of trying to just rest in bed and still the mind, with the concurrent high physical pain level, proved quite challenging.  I needed some other means simpler, easier, for I am so very human.  I put on a documentary about angels, and that was enough to help my mind not at least have it's own busy thought-traffic, as well as to take me out of my physically pained body so the pain was not so horrible to bear. 

I recall one statement made that stands out yet, so figure it is something the Lord wants me to remember and share:  God intends us to have mutual collaboration, not be in competition.   This has to do with our spiritual reasons for existence, but much of it bears well with our temporal situations and relationships.  We are on this earth with holy purposes and missions given us.

Today's Mass Scriptures are of major help in the ways in which the Lord lately has been guiding, instructing, and forming my temporal life as well as my spiritual life, including my hermit vocation he chose for me over 20 years ago, but of which I gave my profession and avowed "fiat" over 19 years ago.  He is leading me to reminders, of which I am writing and sharing; and one is that of remembering His Real Presence as sovereign:  God, Christ Jesus, the Holy Spirit.  The Trinity is the alpha and the omega, the first and the last of our focus, our devotion, our obedience, our faith, hope, and our love.  God is our All to our nothing.

His Church is that--Christ as Head of His Church.  We are the Body of Christ, of His Church.  There is a hierarchy within Christ's Church.  St. Peter is whom Christ chose of a human of the temporal--the rock upon which to build His Church:  Simon, or Peter (Cephas, rock) as Jesus called him.  St. Paul became an apostle after much persecuting of Christians, and his genuine conviction that Christ and His Church, the Christians, were wrong, were false.

What makes the spiritual realm what it is, and that which can also frustrate some, is that there is mystery and the unseen, so much based on sheer faith.  We can discern, we can have others help discern, but there is simply not going to be the concrete, external, seeable, touchable, visible and knowable aspects that are "signs" that we human beings tend to want and need in order to "believe."

In addition to keeping in mind and heart and soul the primacy of the Trinity, of God the Father, God the Son, and the Holy Spirit, is also the reality that Jesus is the Judge.  We can get distracted, even when well-intentioned, with the good of the Church, of Christ's Head and Christ's Body, but the Church is made up of us humans yet with the primacy of Christ as Head.  Christ built His Church upon the rock and gave the keys to the His kingdom to Peter, recognizing that on earth there needs to be a temporal type of structure of continuance.  We human beings are temporal as well as spiritual beings, and in that, some more temporal and some more spiritual.

 The Church's readings selected for Mass today, have us entering into the First Reading being that of the Apostle James who calls himself a "slave of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ.  Did the Church approve of James calling himself a slave of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ?  Probably not.  But James felt that, knew within himself, that he was God's and Jesus' "slave."  Perhaps his angel appeared and used that term, or perhaps James chose it for himself after realizing that, indeed, that is what he is in truth and essence, a slave of God and of Jesus. It is rather a humble and apt term.  I tend to consider myself a prisoner of God; or as God has called me in the past, His "nothing," His "poor gray dove." 

Thus, I have now come to realize I am His hermit:  God's hermit!  (Whether or not I will also be, to a more temporal degree, a hermit of a diocese, I know not yet.)  We all are of and belong to the Trinity, to and in His Real Presence, and yet we are also members of the Church as the Body of Christ with Christ as Head.  There is a primacy beyond the temporal and above event he spiritual, and that is of course God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit.  And there is a hierarchy in the Church which involves the spiritual Headship of Christ and the spiritual aspects of the Body of Christ, as well as the temporal aspects, undeniably present as we are all very much yet human.

"James, a slave of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ....  Consider it all joy, my brothers, when you encounter various trials, for you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.  And let perseverance be perfect, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.  But if any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God who gives to all generously and ungrudgingly, and he will be given it.  But he should ask in faith, not doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed about by the wind... (James 1:1-6).

Next I find what St. Mark writes in 8:11-13, regarding Jesus yet again having to deal with the argumentative Pharisees.  They seem to persist in viewing matters with temporal perspective and also with wanting to test him with the hopes of tripping him so as to twist his words to discredit him.   Those pesky Pharisees were relentless in their trickery and verbal attacks on Jesus; they had little faith in the spiritual and no faith in Jesus Christ, the God-Man, the Father's Son!

Yet today, it can be difficult for us humans to have faith, such as in spiritual experiences or in others' spiritual experiences; or even for people to believe and grasp when people relate such as near death experiences or sightings of angels, or visions.  For some, believing what they are told by others or read about is as the Apostle Thomas felt in one instance--too difficult to trust being told by even those known to us.  These more temporal mindsets must see it or touch it or experience it themselves in order to believe it as true, as fact:  spiritually and mystically true and fact.

"The Pharisees came forward and began to argue with Jesus, seeking from him a sign from heaven to test him. He sighed from the depth of his spirit and said, 'Why does this generation seek a sign?  Amen, I say to you, no sign will be given to this generation.'  Then he left them, got into the boat, and went off to the other shore" (Mark 8:11-13).

St. Pio of Pietrelcina wrote for us some explanation as to how it is that we people can find ourselves tempted to not be able to understand or grasp, to believe and trust that the Lord, or what the Lord is trying to tell us.  "Padre Pio" tells us how to overcome temptation to doubt and how to believe even when we find ourselves in trials and darkness.  We must strive and pray for the ability to see and trust in spiritual light, to grasp the supernatural realities, and remain open to faith without needing tangible, temporal signs or proofs.

"The Holy Spirit tells us:  Don't let your mind succumb to temptation and sorrow, for joy of the heart is life for the soul.  Sorrow is no good for anything and causes our spiritual death.  

"It happens sometimes that the darkness of trial overwhelms your soul's heaven; but this darkness is light!  Thanks to it, you believe even in darkness; the mind feels lost, it fears no longer being able to see, no longer understanding anything.  But this is the moment when the Lord speaks and makes himself present to the soul; and the soul listens, understands and loves in the fear of God.  So don't wait for Tabor to 'see' God when you are already contemplating him on Sinai.

"Progress in the joy of a sincere heart that is wide open.  And if it is impossible for you to keep that happiness, at least don't lose courage, and keep all your trust in God."

I have personally found in my life when I have not trusted in the Lord and not had faith even in some inner showings or locutions, and did not heed them, that I ended up learning the hard way.  What we may think is just our imagination or not really anything to heed, may indeed be our angel or the Holy Spirit trying to help us, to warn us, to keep us from falling to some temptation.  It is easy for us to tell ourselves that some person is all right--that we should not feel that little nudge or little something inside us making us wonder.  Or in other ways, we do not listen within, or do not stop to consider that perhaps there is a different way to view some aspect in the temporal realm.  

So pray for the Holy Spirit to open our minds and hearts, to let us see, hear, feel, touch, smell or whatever other--but with our inner senses.  Pray to discern with open heart and mind but with the wisdom of the Holy Spirit.  With prayer and listening, with reading Scriptures and the writings of those who are tried by years and proven over time and experiences, we can know that trust and faith develops the more we are in His Real Presence.  The more we are in Christ, the more we are able to see as God sees, to experience and trust in Him and to believe what is written in Scriptures, and to discern and apply Scriptures in our daily lives, with faith.  Our eyes are opened in Christ Jesus!

God bless His Real Presence in us!

Catholic Hermit: God's Safety Net

One aspect that came to mind following posting the previous regarding my discerning God's will and where He seems to be guiding me, and of my presumptuousness in wanting to understand His way with me, at least--is that there is always a safety net.

On this eve of St. Padre Pio's feast day and 52nd anniversary of his earthly passing, I sense the build-up of the suffering aspect of my vocation.  Tomorrow I will renew my vow of suffering.  I've not had easy access to it until more unpacked in Solus Deus Hermitage.

And as to my going deeper, if this is the accurate understanding of God's way with my life at this juncture point, an answer to my prayers for fulfilling my mission, I am reminded that there is always a safety net.  

If I am discerning incorrectly and the pruning and plucking that has been going on is not God's way of bringing me to reality of what others came, such as St. Bernard and Padre Pio in full abandonment to God and in living their vocations to what some may consider a deeper mode, then God will in some way let me know.  He will have my guardian angel lead me otherwise, or there will be some signal or shift in situations and direction.

The spiritual friend with whom I was discussing what I think God is asking of me, wanting of me, in deep calling unto deep, said when I pointed out that I've not had any signal such as some of the others have had--that the signal from God, the affirmation might come later.

I'm praying for courage and strength to fully cooperate with a deep dive into God in Himself.  All the love will then flow from God through me in prayer and whatever else.  Already I've had a text from a woman who had asked for prayers for her grandson, Tate--the teen who has leukemia and lost mobility in his hands and legs.  He is a gifted cellist; his progress is quite slow, he sleeps a lot, but he is trying his best!  

See?  This is more where I can be of good use and not have my own personal flaws and flukes be a hindrance or annoyance to those in the active world where God wills them as is their mission and purpose to be there and thus.

I'm totally available to and for others; but I'm seeking after God. 

I'll find out, at least.  Take the plunge.  Find out what is in the deeper of the depths of God.  Perhaps I will all the better be able to pray for others!

God bless His Real Presence in us!

Catholic Hermit Reacts

[Dear Readers, some words are garbled goosh.  Please try to make out the context, for I am trying to write with an old IPad which does not allow for much editing; and it seems to have a mind of its own when I type and cannot see the lines being written.  Blind faith that the thoughts are there, or so I hope!]

It would be easy, when the devil is using situations and persons to create chaos and hindrances, to react by focusing on the events.  That is exactly what one must resist doing.  While very human to get distracted, upset, or have what the devil delights in outcome--confusion--we must not veer, especially from prayer and praise.

So it was that this nothing consecrated Catholic hermit kept with the prayer concerns entrusted to me.  Fr. V., in a far off land, had asked for prayers for a preached retreat he was leading, preparing seminarians for their first priestly professions in his religious order, the Spiritans, the Community of  the Holy Spirit.  Ah, they are alive and thriving in the Christian Faith, with burgeoning growth in priestly vocations!

There are holy friends who have specific and major prayer needs.  Family has prayer requests.  Yes, there are so many concerns requiring prayer, that wouldn't it be just like the devil to try to distract us, especially this hermit, from remembering to pray for each and every one?  So we must remain focused, no matter how irritating or amazing is the devilry going on around us or grappling into our inner lives.

I think of St. John Vianney, whose bed would be shaken across the room, flames leaping up around it. He would calmly but firmly, with a touch of humor, tell the devil to give it up, as then the saint turned over and went back to sleep.  I think of St. Padre Pio who took beatings from the evil one, yet he did not cease in his prayers for soulless, regardless the assaults.

So we must not react other than to focus all the more in our loving and joyful or even our pleading conversations with God.

On another note, literally, Fr. V. sent an email, expressing some frustration with his internet service, for every time he tried to write more of an instructive and encouraging message, it would be lost. He was finally able to get a few lines sent, including that the retreat is going well.  He  emphasized that I must continue to go to the Mass, ignoring the human element, as he phrased it.  Although he did acknowledge how difficult that is to do in practice.

So, one must not react as how the human in us would be inclined to react.  We must react as God would react, as Jesus did react.  He was firm, resolute, in command of the situation in a calm way mostly, but at times he strongly rebuked the devil.  Jesus, also, turned his face toward Jerusalem and walked toward his time of Crucifixion with courage and strength, resolute to fulfilling His ultimate mission.