Catholic Hermit: Hermit's Coronavirus Updates

After the first very worrisome, middle-of-night upper lung pain and breathing heaviness, and seriously considering driving to an ER connected with a hospital (the ER of my COVID testing last Monday does not have hospital with it, not yet), I decided to wait an hour, take another cough suppressing pill, use the inhaler, take a pain med, and trust in the Lord.

Awoke in morning from phone ringing.  Was the COVID-19 test results.  Negative!  Elated and grateful, I was told upper respiratory infection but not the coronavirus.  I am convinced that the Lord brought me to the middle-of-night concern as lungs were worst thus far, and then offered the good news of negative test result.  I also reflect upon why I had such a difficult time getting a simple prescription of Azithromycin from two separate health care providers, but thanks be to God for the ER medical doctor who prescribed that plus inhaler and cough suppressant.

Took the last of the "z-pack" yesterday, and today while still mostly in bed resting, I'm definitely on the mend.  Had I not gone to the ER to ask a third medical provider for Azithromycin, this prolonged (or not treated accurately for a crucial week-before-last), the infection would have moved into the lower lungs as that was where the cough was starting to come from in middle of night scare.  The Lord has also worked out for me to get a new medical doctor--an internist. 

God provides so beautifully and generously in our lives!  As a consecrated in Christ, Catholic hermit,  all the more I marvel that I needed no assistance in these past three weeks other than was prudent to have a person, wearing gloves and with hand sanitizer, to take the antibiotic, inhaler, and cough med prescription to the pharmacy and set outside my hermitage the medications.  No other interchange, no proximity other than 20' distance for I put the script in tailgate of truck so the kindly helper only had to reach for it with my standing 20' downwind from truck, mask on, and held the coughs until the person left and I was back in my truck.

These and others were instructions from ER doctor and nurse, as to the care and precautions people need to be taking if having any symptoms of COVID-19.  My not receiving the z-pack when I knew I first needed it caused time and precautions and concerns for ER COVID team, plus flu test and COVID-test and state lab analysis.  I likely would have been well by now or even a few days ago with correct antibiotic 12 days ago. But I know how others feel with such symptoms and sickness, their thoughts and wondering, and I'd not have done as much research which has helped guide my choices going forward.

This is a serious virus of so many unknowns such as lasting effects on the human body. (They know already that it can create permanent lung damage in some older COVID survivors; and many studies covering various facets will be on-going for a long time on this virus.  After myself being so ill with the sinus infection run amuck without proper, earlier treatment, I can assume my resistance is lower than normal.  And I am quite susceptible to COVID-19 now, as is everyone else who's not contracted it and survived it.  Even with those who recover, there have been cases of those who have re-contracted the virus, possibly in a different strain, l or s.

I'm going to follow all the procedures which I discovered while researching COVID-19.  I'll keep up with the wiping of surfaces, precautions that are recommended, and will stay inside other than in my yard wearing a mask or if need to go somewhere in an emergency type need.  I have someone young and without symptoms who must go to grocery for young family needs who is willing to pick up any items I may need. The only item would be a prescription, but even that--I can hold out a bit longer.  The person is going tomorrow for their own needs, so will accept kind offer.  Will have that person drop it off outside hermitage.

I simply do not want to risk catching COVID-19 or being exposed to it through the various ways it is so easily transmitted nor to transfer from me to someone other.  Nor do I want to pass on whatever it is that I have suffered as while I know I did not have either flu strain, there is no way to know what I have other than severe upper respiratory ailment.

As to my trying to impress upon the few others who I encountered via email or a phone call or some text messages--the importance of cooperating with the President's Task Forces' "15 Days to Stop the Spread" guidelines--I've come to realize that by now people are entrenched in what they want to do and how they choose to think and nothing I can say or write further is going to change their choices and behaviors.

I've returned to praise of God and prayer for the world.  Today a morning text from someone in position of  Church leadership and vocation, shared the person's plan to offer confession 6 hours a day, plus encourage adoration as would be exposing the Blessed Sacrament in a large chapel/facility Tabernacle.  Included in that facility is a health care unit for elderly persons.  I did text back that this time period in our lives certainly calls upon us to have much greater faith that Christ is in the Tabernacle in our hearts and souls.  I mentioned that I can remain His, solus Deus, until the pandemic has lessened. 

I did not directly state but is so true:  we can adore Christ within us and adore Him from within our abodes; we can ask God to forgive our sins and in greater faith trust in His mercy at this time.  This is prudence and charity toward others.  

We can partake of the tangible, physical aspects of Sacraments when the dangers have passed.  We can gather physically together in chapels and churches to adore Christ in the Tabernacle.  And while I did not text this as I know my words will not dampen the determination for the person who so wants "to do" something helpful which is not helpful in this time of heath crisis requiring physical distancing--I prayed that the person might consider own age--past 70, and not in best of health.

The Lord continues to humble me in returning me to Him and to prayer and praise.  In the Book of Hosea, 6:1-6 of today's first reading at Mass (with us no longer meeting together for Mass due to the wisdom of professionals whose research and statistics factually show us how this serious virus is transmitted and how to contain, mitigate, and eventually stop the rapid and can-be-deadly spread of COVID-19)--I find the Lord showing me the path forward in my own hermit way of helping, and also for anyone be they priest or lay person, religious order monk or nun, adult or child.

In these verses from the Living Word of God, some the reminder, reassurance, and faithful "action" we are to take in such times in which we now are living, with some suffering, recovering--but also some dying.

"Come, let us return to the Lord, it is He who has rent, 
but He will heal us; He has struck us, 
but He will bind our wounds.  
He will revive us after two days; 
on the third day He will raise us up, 
to live in His presence.  
Let us know, let us strive to know the LORD; 
as certain as the dawn is His coming,
and His judgment shines forth like the light of day!
He will come to us like the rain, 
like spring rain that waters the earth.

"'What can I do with you, Ephraim"  
What can I do with you Judah?
Your piety is like a morning cloud, 
like the dew that early passes away.
For this reason I smote them through the prophets;
I slew the by the words of my mouth;
For it is love that I desire not sacrifice, 
and knowledge of God rather than holocausts.'"

As for my own frustrations in trying to break through to even a handful or so people who are literally, perhaps, hell-bent on going out and about with suspect yet minor symptoms, or asymptomatic but not at all heeding the advice and request to just STAY INSIDE.  That is, stay inside only and unless we need to go out for medical care or groceries--and go once a week or ten days (or longer) to purchase what is needed; do not shop frequently, in other words.  Exercise at home, pray at home, and work from home if possible.  Otherwise, it is recommended for those only to work who are in medical profession, law enforcement, and other crucial employments necessary to help with global health crisis.

I will stop expressing the realities of concern and that are interpreted "stressed-out" or "over-reacting."  I will stop silently calling out from my hermit cell via text or email or one rare caller.  By now people have heard even if they do not heed the research being given hourly from the multiple news agencies online, via television, and in print media.  My frustration, fueled by how very sick I have been --and that not even COVID-19, must cease.  What sickness I had was awful enough; and it might be another week or more while the Azithromycin continues to work within this body, for me to resume some manual labor. 

The Lord is calling His nothing Catholic hermit to return to my life devoted to praise of God and prayer for the world, in the silence of solitude and in stricter separation from the World. I return to being a silent preaching of Christ and a hidden reminder of the mystery of Christ in His Church.  To be now, the humbled one praying.  I must remain off and alone with God, in my hermitage bedroom.  Not even raise my eyes to heaven but to beat my breast and pray, "Oh God, be merciful to me, a sinner."

"Come, let us return to the Lord, it is He who has rent, but He will heal us...."

God bless His Real Presence in us, always!

Catholic Hermit: Humility Best for Hermits

Yesterday this nothing consecrated (at least in Christ and to be determined by Bishop if in the life of the Church) Catholic hermit had to finally humbly accept that getting out of bed to do any bit of manual labor was not what the Lord was allowing.  In fact, had to take medication every 3 hours rather than my having been successfully stretching it to every 4-5 hours.  No pride allowed, not even in pain management efforts!  

Humility is especially important for hermits.  Living in solitude, the devil can tempt with various devious ways to incite pride in us hermits; the devil despises our ever-striving for union with Christ and in living, such as the likes of me, more hidden than ever in a nondescript dwelling, my hermitage:  Solus Deus (God Alone).

Thus, the second Reading of today's Mass, Sunday's worship liturgy, is excellent for hermits as we are called to witness to the mystery of Christ in the Church.  We are to devote our lives to the praise of God and in prayer for the salvation of the world [and all souls in this world and in purgatory].  We are to remain hidden from the eyes of men [others, pass unnoticed], in stricter separation from the world, and to silently preach Christ by our lives lived in the solitude of silence.

The words of St. Paul in his First Letter to the Corinthians, 2:1-5, remind of what is crucially purposeful for hermits (and all Christians).  I keep these words of the Apostle Paul closely within my mind, heart, and soul as I rise and dress, and praise God and pray for all, on this beautiful day of the Lord's Rest.

"When I came to you, brothers and sisters, proclaiming the mystery of God, I did not come with sublimity of words or of wisdom.  For I resolved to know nothing while I was with you except Jesus Christ, and him crucified.  I came to you in weakness and fear and much trembling, and my message and my proclamation were not with persuasive [words of] wisdom, but with a demonstration of spirit and power, so that your faith might rest not on human wisdom but on the power of God."

God bless His Real Presence in us!  Little children, let us love God in Himself, and love others as God loves, as God loves us all!

Catholic Hermit: Raised Beyond in Christ Jesus

I continue to be amazed at how many views of this blog continue to be of those wanting to know how to become a Catholic hermit.  However, recently, increasing numbers of this blog, A Catholic Hermit, are interested in the richer aspects, the spiritual aspects that come in living the eremitic vocation in the joyous anticipation of Christ's desire for us to come to Divine Union in Him.

Becoming a Catholic Hermit has been covered in my blog quite amply.  The Lord has raised me beyond the details of what the Church requires of those of us who have made our profession of the three evangelical counsels as well as offered our vows, either publicly or privately.  That, in looking back over the nearly two decades of my hermit life, seems now the simple yet definitively profound and necessary part.

But allowing the Lord to form the hermit, along with one's spiritual director, confessor, priest (if other than or in addition to a priest director), Bishop--ultimately brings the consecrated Catholic hermit beyond temporal, goodly intermediaries and into the God-lifted spiritual life of which all souls are called.  

The visitor yesterday who will return sometime today with some provisions I need, discussed briefly how it is that there comes a time in which we recognize very much and with great gratitude, how it is that God, in HIs Son, and through the Holy Spirit, is forever the source and pinnacle of our full and holy formation in His Divine Will.  

A transition occurs, sometimes without our being consciously aware, that the Lord is dealing with us more directly, and we are lifted up increasingly even amidst the depths of the worst of suffering, despite the breadth of ongoing clouds of "unknowing." One becomes of God's will and divine action, profoundly, definitively, consecrated by Christ and consecrated in Christ.

What transcends all else is becoming raised beyond in Jesus Christ.

I cannot emphasize this enough, although I cannot now attempt to write more on descriptions or specifics.  But this I do know from the Holy Spirit, and from Christ Himself,  what is the "better part" of which Jesus mercifully explains to Martha who was yet tied with being busy about many things--not bad--but that her sister Mary had chosen the "better part."

Being on the cross with Christ, one is raised beyond in Jesus Christ.  That truth is steadfast; I suppose it helps if one recognizes that we have been brought thus far and offers praise in the humility of great suffering.  There is joy in suffering, thus.

What is of value, then, what now matters?  We might find ourselves asking this necessary question.  Take heed of the answer God alone provides in various means and ways.  This is of heaven, not earth.

God bless His Real Presence in us!

Catholic Hermit: The Silence of Solitude

As I alternatively write of variety of spiritual and temporal thoughts and occurrences in the life of  days unfolding in this my consecrated Catholic hermit existence, the current exercise is to better grasp and further instill within me what the Church sets forth for hermits.   I turn once more to The Catechism of the Catholic Church, which brings me to a hermit's means of achieving a life devoted to praise of God and salvation of the world...through previously pondered means, now to... the silence of solitude.

Let's refresh with section 920 in The Catechism. We read past 915 and 916, of note in describing the Evangelical Counsels so crucial to the hermit's profession, and come to the section titled: "Eremitic Life."  Offered below is the exact wording of section 915; I have emboldened the silence of solitude, the point of present pondering.

"920.  Without always professing the three evangelical counsels publicly, hermits 'devote their life to the praise of God and salvation of the world through a stricter separation from the world, the silence of solitude and assiduous prayer and penance.'"

Much of excellence has been written of silence, of solitude, and of the silence of solitude.  As a consecrated Catholic hermit, I've read various books on such topics--excellent writings of monks, priests, hermits, spiritual masters.  There are essays to be found online as well as within texts, such as writings of the desert fathers and mothers.  We can find statements on the eremitical need and even virtue, of silence and solitude, in the Scriptures. (I will attempt in separate post, a list of books in my personal library.  Very rough pain yet again today; how difficult it is to endure standing upright by bookcases to jot down titles--yet I'll try to do so even if tomorrow.)

Within the writings and the reality of the silence of solitude, we consider both exterior and interior of silence and of solitude.  Think on the truth that in our existences, we can be silent ourselves and experience silence around us, in external way.  

We can keep our voices silent, the environment in which we are at the moment or where we live can be without noise to greater or lesser degrees.  (Even if we silence ourselves as much as humanly possible, there is still noise around us--hum of earth, heart beating and blood coursing through bodily vessels, breath's inhale and exhale, breeze rustling nature, insect winging.

Solitude may be considered, likewise, as exterior and interior "positions" or "potentialities."  External solitude examples include the physical, the temporal, of a body, creature, or some types of things being alone, not having other persons, creature or types of things around, in vicinity.  We or someone or something other, is solitary in a way that is observed, seen, known.

On the other hand, interior silence and solitude have to do with our inner senses and inner essences, our inner dispositions whether or not we are consciously aware of our silence or our solitude.  This interior silence and solitude may occur despite external noise and despite other persons, creatures, or things visibly around us.  When we are in interior silence and interior solitude, what is intangible and non-temporal may or may not be silently or invisibly known to us.

Yet for a hermit, our silence is through, with, and in God; our solitude is through, with, and in God.  The experience of a silent, solitary soul uniting with the immensity of the seemingly silent omniscient, omnipotent, omnipresent God creates the ultimate in the silence of solitude.

Consider the prophet Ezekiel seeking God in the silence of solitude.  He listened with exterior and interior senses, he stood alone at the mouth of the cave.  When he became silent and removed from the presence of all around him, then it was he "heard" God; he became aware of God alone, solus Deus.

We may be aware in our conscious practicing or of positioning ourselves in the silence of solitude.  Over time in living the silence of solitude, we may not be consciously aware.  Or we may come to the experience of such a silent, solitary union with breath and voice of God and the reality of His presence in us or us in Him, that we are unknowing of such profound silence of solitude.

This brings to the fore the reality of the silence of solitude being a progression.  I consider the title of the filmed documentary, first time within a Carthusian charterhouse for such exposure:  Into Great Silence.  The title is not "In" Great Silence but rather "Into" Great Silence.  The silence of solitude involves movement and growth, of evolving silence, evolving solitude, and together a flow of one with the other and of one into the other.

The silence of solitude has not only the flow of progression, but there may be an ebb of progression--a receding or lessening of silence, solitude and the silence of solitude.  This ebb of the silence of solitude can occur off and on in the days, weeks, months, and years of a hermit's vocation and life.  There are situations and phases in which an eremitic might have more noise and less silence; the hermit's solitude may be intruded upon.  

The ebbing of silence of solitude can occur due to the hermit's own choices--a slippage in the hermit's vocational striving in stricter separation from the world in the silence of solitude.  God can allow challenges to the hermit's silence of solitude of which the hermit must respond in one way or other. 

The ebbing may be due to God's allowing (different than challenging) of unavoidable situations such as a hermit's health declining, permanent or temporary change in circumstance or locale.  In more rare situations God's will may be for the hermit (usually via director, priest, bishop, superior) to accept a shift in the living out of the hermit's vocation.  (St. Bruno and St. Colette are each examples of God's desiring, asking, willing such a change in these hermits' vocations.)

For it is God who leads us into silence and solitude; God is the One who keeps us in the embrace of silence and solitude. Thus we become one with God's own silence, in His own solitude, as much as our beings can comprehend and fathom the silence of solitude of God in Himself.  God wills the degree and the flow (and of what God-deigned ebb) of our silence of solitude within His silence of solitude.  We become God's own in His silence and of His solitude.

There are other more practical and indicative aspects of silence, solitude, and of the silence of solitude.  We do well to ponder suffering's silence, suffering's solitude, suffering's silence of solitude in actual, temporal aspects as well as in the reality of Christ's suffering in the silence of solitude.

We may take some moments or more to consider personality types and silence and of solitude.  Consider the marvelous ways in which God brings about the glory of silence of solitude in a person whose personality or learned socialization was that of highly interactive, social, and generously, purposely, interactively involved in a life in the world among many people.  Yet he can call such a person to His will and purposes as an eremitic in the life of His Church; and while the personality instilled by God in that person, that soul,  God effects all the graces necessary to mold the hermit to His desires in ways that mystify.

As God is love, the consideration of the hermit's increasing, holy formation within the silence of solitude ought also include that of the place of charity in silence, charity in solitude, and charity in the silence of solitude.  A hermit must discern when charity calls for the hermit to speak and to be presently, actively available to another or others.  This is particularly important in the hermit's relationships and possible vocation prior to being called by God to enter the eremitic life in the Church.  Charity must reign amidst practical and spiritual parameters, yet the silence of solitude is best broken when charity is the reason and purpose:  God is love.  

Yet charity also informs the hermit when the silence of solitude is threatened beyond what is necessary, holy, and of God's will in the various situations a hermit encounters throughout the vocation.  God in His mercy understands when a hermit ebbs too far or frequently from the silence of solitude; but the hermit must remain within God's heart of silence of solitude, even when called out of the silence of solitude for charitable reasons and purposes.  The ebb, even if brief, must be returned to the flow into great and greater silence of solitude.

These thoughts are my own, in this present moment of a deeper, more intense than ever before, silence of solitude in the reform of my lived, for better or worse, eremitic vocation of 20 years.  In self-examen on this very topic of a hermit's silence of solitude, I know the areas in which I feel or think I need less silence or less solitude.  I'm considering the role of internet, even if noiseless, or silently reading an article or a tangible book, in regard to what is silent noise, what is or is not solitude.  

When I watch such as the documentary Athos the other day, or last night watched a most intriguing film based on a true life couple of which the theme that of Christlike charity to lead one's enemy to a holy death--I can grasp that in a way, the persons in the film become company of sorts.  They enter into the solitude of my hermitage, of my external and internal senses as guests who speak with exterior voices and enter into the interior silence of my mind, heart, and soul.

In doing some internet searches of contemporary hermits in the life of the Church--Catholic and Orthodox--I find the degrees of each hermit of their progression in the silence of solitude.  There is no judgment on my part, nor should there be on anyone's part.  We hermits are in progress yet while in situ; God is our ultimate superior to Whom we have utter and full obedience; Jesus is our beloved savior, spouse, mentor ; the Holy Spirit is our guide and instructor.  At least, again, these are my thoughts.  

There are times in a hermit's vocational progression as well as in the make up of the hermit's on-going temporal and spiritual circumstances that cause the unique and individualized aspects that God knows, allows, and understands.  Yet we hermits still must strive in the progression, in faith and hope in God toward perfection in what God wills of us within our vocations, our lives in this world, and our eventual union in Him for eternity.

The silence of solitude is a spoke in the wheel of a hermit's journey.  The wheel rotates and propels this vehicle of vocation called the eremitic life in the consecrated life of the Church.  We hermits, as other followers of Christ, are consecrated by God and consecrated in Christ; we are baptized in the Holy Spirit.  And specifically as hermits, we are living out, to varying degrees and holiness, our lives in His Real Presence, yet one in the vast Body of Christ, His Church.

God bless His Presence in us!

Catholic Hermit: More on Consecration

Pseudo-Dionysius (whose writings greatly influenced the thoughts of John of the Cross and numerous other saints and mystics who read the 5th century writings) has this to say about consecration.

"For it is on Jesus himself, our most divine altar, that there is achieved the divine consecration of intelligent beings.  In him, as scripture says, 'we have access' to consecration and are mystically offered as a holocaust.  So let us behold with transcending eye that divine altar where sanctifying consecrations are performed, itself being consecrated by the most divine ointment.  For it is the most holy Jesus who consecrates himself for us.  [Note: Rom 5:2; Eph 2:18]  It is he who grants us the fullness of his own consecration and who arranges to offer generously to us, as children of God, whatever is consecrated on him."

Dionysius continually lifts the thoughts and insights to the heights of spiritual grasping and reality.  Perhaps this aspect is what influenced John of the Cross to his mystical understanding and writings.  Dionysius always moves through the temporal, beyond the tangible, yet moves transcendently as if through layers until the soul is elevated and is imbued with holiness that comes through his consecration.  The soul is led to grasp Scripture and the Church and the desire for union with Christ at spiritual and mystical realities of Christ's truths.

Consecration is far more than, and beyond, a temporal, tangible act--at least the consecration that seems to matter most to Christ, for our souls.

[Note: "through whom also we have obtained our introduction by faith into this grace in which we stand; and we exult in hope of the glory of God" (Rom 5:2).]

"for through Him we both have our access in one Spirit to the Father" (Eph. 3:1)