The title pretty much explains what occurred during Mass. The good Lord allowed a begging hermit to be released to leave the debacle. When a priest does not have a vocation in priesthood but instead in theater and the arts, the result is not good when one is trying to perform in what is not the vocation.
This hermit's body has returned to the hermitage to pray, suffer, and pray some more, then praise His Real Presence. There needs to be praise, always, for the sorrows can be overwhelming.
Will discuss the situation with the spiritual father. For now, recollect oneself in prayer and shake off the horror, the hell, of the effects of this morning's Mass situation. The sacrifice of being mercifully wrenched from a hellish situation part way through is offered for the salvation of this poor nothing consecrated Catholic hermit's soul and whatever the Lord wills of its mission in time remaining on earth.
Jesus bequeaths us His peace, not hell--especially not during Mass.
Would it do any good to talk with the one who surely must be trying to at least fulfill the rudimentary aspects as it relates to doing a "job"? No. Best to just pray and to keep working, and to embrace the exile the Lord has allowed for yet another year.
God bless His Real Presence in us, and that includes His Real Presence in all of us, despite confusing our callings or taking up what seems the route that provides some kind of security in order to express what and in which our nature and heart are more gifted.
This hermit will ponder these matters and reflect upon its own vocation and calling, and strive to fulfill living it in a way pleasing to the Lord. That will be perhaps the best prayer in the circumstances. Mystical ecstasies during Mass are not always bliss. Being in such a state allows for a very deep sensing and showing at various levels. When good, then bliss; when not so good, then hell.
At least this hermit tried and tried its best. To soothe the criticism of any potential blog readers who like to attack, this hermit can say it is the hermit's fault, all of it. And, in some regards, yes, we are to suffer in union with Jesus, all things.
One thing is certain regarding mystical experiences. There is much suffering and responsibility, and always abject honesty in truth, along with the joy. When in mystical ecstasy, it is all reality and all truth; nothing is obscured.