Catholic Hermit: Seek What Is Above

Was able to peel the body up from floor bed, distract from pain, and drive to morning Mass.  While not Easter, I must trust the Lord understands my situation.  God created time; He exists beyond time--yesterday, today, tomorrow....

I'm yet fascinated and also clinging to this Second Reading of Easter Mass from 2 Colossians.  I can't seem to absorb enough of the reality that since I am raised with Christ, I ought seek what is above--where His Real Presence reigns:  Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.

Think of what is above, not of what is on earth.
For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God.

While I'm now trying to make myself do some tasks--mindless ones, but yet tasks that help keep the body moving about some and the mind a little distracted from pain--I came across some old photos of the children when young.  They were in a plastic container that my mother had--photos she had saved and were among what she passed on to me 15 years ago or more.  I'm cleaning plastic bins and containers in the tub, and thus the unpacking continues.

I cannot look long or at many photos of the past.  They take my mind back to other times, and today it was to the time after a cruel and surprising leave-taking of my earthly spouse.  The photos, however, show beautiful, happy children in school photos as well as prior, just following the divorce in an Olin Mill's church photo, and a bit later, when we were in more financially improved mode from moving to a less costly area of the country.  And, I must add, we were in a far more healthy, safe, supportive, and positive area among long-time friends and extended family.

My memories, though, tend to bring emotions that are not helpful admixed with severe, physical pain.  The remembrances take me more to the temporal, to life as it was, with my take on those times probably far more positive than what the children, now adults with their own lives and primary relationships, may recall. 

I think such matters vary over time, and with the temporal can come regret, what-if's, and resentment.  I'd add there could also be too roseate or unrealistic recollection; but positive seems better than negative.  Positive memories indicate the grace and presence of forgiveness.

However, the photos were turned over in the pile so as to keep from fading; the washing of the containers progressed with success; I made a conscious effort to turn off the emotion of any tinge of sadness, regret,  and movement toward missing that time period with sweet and precious children.  

Rather, I praised God for having allowed me to be a parent, for providing for us in some aspects, miraculously so, and for where each of these treasures are now, in their lives.  I also again recognized my main purpose with them now that they are reared, is to pray for their souls and the souls of their significant others and off spring.

In this instance, I am seeking for myself and for them, that which is above.

While listening to an interview of a man named Bart Millard, lead singer for the Christian band, Mercy Me, I was impressed with something he'd been told that puts perspective on loss.  This can mean loss of a person who has passed, especially when young, but it also can mean any loss we feel of any past experiences and situations and the people therein.

Someone had told the singer, to remember that our significance with others, the relationship, has far more to do with eternity than with our brief time on earth.  Now, that is seeking that which is above--not remaining affixed to that which is on earth.

Writing thoughts is helpful to me; other than being in Mass in the mystical state, writing of Christ's Words, of spiritual aspects and relating them to daily life, this type of content writing takes me away from pain which can bind.  If able, manual labor--but praying while working--also helps distract the mind and emotions being negatively chained to pain.

I continue to ask the Lord, though, to help elevate my writing and thoughts, to guide me to His will in what is my mission now.  Is it to write my little blog reflections and occasional verbal sharing, or does He want me to write in a more focused and organized fashion, such as a small book?  Yes, that would take added discipline and effort.  Or, does He consider that my eclectic efforts are transpiring, in the pinnacle of what He said to me many years ago, when sending me back into my lifeless body on that gurney, to "rear my children and fulfill my mission"?

It could be this simple.  My mission might be to be doing and being as I am now, in my imperfections and yet my strivings for spiritual perfection--so inept in striving amidst the physical pain sapping my energy and tempting me to turn to temporal distraction that seems easier, somehow.  I do recognize that the "seeming easier" is a ruse, of course! 

What is easier than agreeing to seek what is above?  Will not my angel and the Holy Spirit--the source of energy and love, swirling and enlivening His Real Presence in our bodies, minds, hearts, and spirits--lift me and revivify the seeking of that which is above, not of earth? 

So I accept!  I agree to seek what is above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God--to think of what is above and not of what is on earth.  May His Real Presence and the Blessed Virgin Mary, take the fullness of all that God made me, and lift my soul to heavenly efforts even while I am yet shackled to pain of temporality.  

Perhaps it is expecting a lot from grace and faith, but I have hope that  I have made the process too complicated--too much like that of processes on earth.  After all, I am dealing with God the Father, Jesus Christ the Son, and the Holy Spirit of all beingness and energy!  The mercy and love of His Real Presence knows no bounds.  The love and caring concern by the Virgin Mary, Mother of God, is that of mother toward child.  

We are covered by grace and love, uplifted, in good hands!

God bless His Real Presence in us!

"Brothers and sisters:
If then you were raised with Christ, seek what is above,
where Christ is seated at the right hand of God.
Think of what is above, not of what is on earth.
For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God.
When Christ your life appears,
then you too will appear with him in glory." ~ 2 Col 3:1-4

Catholic Hermit: Correspondence

Some days, quite a bit of prayerful thoughts and writing go into correspondence.  Currently, a challenge for this nothing consecrated Catholic hermit is to not spend much time if any in responding to question or advice asked regarding temporal decisions.  

(Ultimately, discussing many details of temporal decisions in daily life is not at all what we are going to be worrying about on our death beds.  My mission is of the spiritual for others, not the temporal details that we can figure out, or if not, really won't matter.  Live and learn: we learn by making decisions on such things, ourselves.

If it is something dealing with a relationship or how our spiritual lives or the souls of others are impacted, that is different.  So it is that the other day I spent time responding to something written to me in an email, that also jiggled what is necessary for my own soul.  Perhaps it is good for anyone's soul.  It is another aspect of spiritual combat, of dealing with the devil--by not dealing too much, not dallying with every little skirmish of the devil but moving on with God-pivoting quickly and effectively.

I'm going to share some of what I wrote to the one who asked some advice.  The topic was of making a temporal, rather mundane purchase, at their phase in life.  I share what came out of the thoughts partly because it is a good reminder for this most spinal-headachy-hermit this morning.  I can easily think too much, write about (in the more rare verbal encounter) mundanities or decisions quite temporal and which could be handled effectively (and prayerfully, always), then let go. Free our lives for the spiritual, for thinking as God thinks, for that which is above, not below!

"Dear Z,

"I think we need to do far more God-pivoting.  If we know we are under assault, that is one thing; but we must not keep our attention on the things that show up, for there are going to be many every day.  We can even start looking for them, and why look for the devil?  So it is one thing to recognize we are in spiritual combat, which is really all the time; but it is the next and only holy step, to turn to God, to pivot, and learn to easily cast off the devil's involvements.

"This morning (my prayer started yesterday) I tried to make an act of the will to not wake up and have my first thoughts be how I wanted to be dead...and then thoughts of dismay over the workload here.  But the main trigger is the physical pain, waking up like that.  However, the habit of wanting to be dead and waking up with that thought, I need to try to stop. See how we feed ourselves on more of the devil just by our own choices of thoughts?

"So let L. go.  When you wrote that she said the house they are in has room for a garden and chickens, she did not say they HAVE a garden or chickens.  And people often talk aloud or share plans they have for travel, but things come up that they change their minds.  So we have to just let those things pass by and not make too much of it in our thoughts, or build more of a case against the persons involved, for what good does that do us, anyway?  What good does it do for you to have more negative thoughts, or to now be looking for things that might not be true or seem like stories made up, when it is just people thinking about plans they'd like but then changing their minds?

"I read a bit more in St. Teresa's Way of Perfection.  It had to do with suffering and sticking with the spiritual life, and realizing that those people having to be out in the world or being in both worlds, like parish priests have to interact with both the temporal and the spiritual--that it is very hard for them and to pray for them, and someone like me should be very thankful to not have so much to do with the world.  Good Lord, dealing with Lowe's cabinet order errors is more than enough for me!

"So we have to get our minds in more positive thoughts about God, as that is the God-pivot we need, to think of things above, not below.  It is one thing to recognize who is behind a lot of the stuff [the devil], but we also have to recognize that sometimes, like with me, my own negative thinking needs to be changed first thing upon waking, as example.

"Regardless of any of it, what good does it do me at all to think about it, to compare or to go over the issues that come up?  I need to learn to God-pivot a lot faster. It is all right to share the problems that come up each day, but I think it will be better for us to share the problems but then God-pivot to how the problems got solved, or how we dismissed the problems, or changed our thoughts from negative to positive, even if people are doing things wrong.

"And that is something for us to consider, that some of the devil's tricks include getting us to think too much of what the devil is doing, and not God-pivoting fast enough, so that some of what we do or think, then, is from the devil's influence and getting us to be negative ourselves!"

[I spare readers from four, too-lengthy paragraphs of comments and considerations regarding temporal issues the emailer had asked me about or mentioned.  I used personal examples to try to relate back with how we can try to overcome, but also I wrote details of how to solve certain temporal aspects that, truly, are not worth sharing and were not worth writing to begin with!  It has nothing to do with the soul; what matters is our spiritual progression. 

[So this is another thing I must learn as a consecrated Catholic hermit but perhaps more so as a Catholic Christian mystic:  stick with that which is above, not with what is below.  If something temporal is asked, answer simply--once.  The correspondence that responds to too many temporal details--a prayer instead would work wonders.  We don't do others or ourselves any favors by dwelling on temporal decisions or problems.  Who needs to know more of the cabinet glitch saga?  Lowe's manager is now doing his best to solve errors, I think, hope, and pray.  I must practice the God-pivot in the ordinary details of life.  Think as God thinks, for ourselves, and others:  Love and Mercy!]