It's been an exhausting several days. After four and a half months of staying with two sets of relatives, this tired and pained consecrated Catholic hermit is finally in a new-to-me hermitage.
Solus Deus: God alone.
A week ago yesterday the Lord took the wheel of my pickup truck, Precious Blood, and helped me endure 15 hours of interstate-mostly driving through parts of four states and the entire length of yet one more state. At one point, exhausted, I took an exit by error, although someone had said to get from one interstate to another in a certain town. So I took the exit that stated the town's name.
Well, I took the instructions too literally. I was to stay on the one interstate until it intersected the other interstate near that town. However, an hour and a half later, having seen some side-road vistas and having met six kindly town-persons who kindly gave instructions as to how to get out of the town and find the interstate needed to get to the intersection that would take me yonder in correct direction to my final destination, the man at the post office proved to have the right way.
I spent two nights in an Airbnb (a room to rent via internet reservation but breakfast is generally not included, thus actually an Airb...) whose lovely owner had a floor bed ready for me as I arrived rather late in the evening. She also, the next morning, gave me strong, hot coffee and made a healthy bowl of oatmeal and allowed me to unwind, for I was in no physical shape to even attempt driving nearby for breakfast out. I gave her some added money for her kindness--of which she did not want to accept but finally agreed to take what I offered, for Airbnb hosts really do not make a lot of money on their reasonable offerings, and this woman in particular is between phases in her life and has needs.
She was reared Catholic but has lapsed as have so many I encounter, here and there. She is a gentle, peaceful, and most beautiful soul who tended her parents' in their passing two weeks apart from one another and within two weeks of her brother (their son) passing unexpectedly. About the same time, her husband of 20 years called her to say he did not want to be married anymore. This was a couple or more years ago, but still, the impact of the suffering she has borne was not lost on me, one bit.
She also has suffered recently from a torn shoulder and hopes to avoid surgery to repair it. I'm praying she can have some miraculous healing. But from my two-shoulder surgery experience, of which the first surgeon missed a major tear and dismissed my concerns for a year saying I was a malingerer and nothing wrong--I hope if no miraculous healing, that she will endure the quite painful surgery but which can fix the problem as she has a lot of life yet to live. She's in my prayers and in my heart of gratitude, both.
So the house closing appointment came and went. Both the bank mortgage man and my real estate agent came, as we'd been together in the house-hunting process for the four and a half months. Each of these men are outstanding, kindly, honest, efficient, and professionals. What a difference it makes in life when we are assisted in the temporal aspects we all must face and endure, when we have good people with whom we interact and make needful transactions.
Then I got a couple recommendations from the storage facility employees as to local movers, as well as some tips from my real estate agent and online research--and the next afternoon the remains of my earthly possessions were loaded onto trucks by four men. Within 3.6 hours, the menagerie of mostly religious books and artwork, a few old pieces of furniture, and boxes of pots, pans, dishes, bedding and other temporal detritus of life were unloaded into the garage of Solus Deus, and only the few piece of furniture not requiring repair and refinishing, into the hermitage itself.
I asked them to put the boxspring and mattress of the bed I'd had way back in my Agnus Dei hermitage, six years ago, on the floor as I wanted to see if that then-firm bed my back could tolerate. It is not bad; I slept on it most of three nights until the pain too much to deal with. Back to the floor this hermit went; and on the floor for a bed this hermit shall for sleeping and pain sieges, remain.
(At some point, I will try a piece of 3/8" subflooring on the mattress set and see if the pained back can cope with that added firmness. Otherwise, I will build a platform with a plywood base, but up high enough so I can see out the windows to a lovely, natural, scenic view, when needing to recline for sleep or pain siege recovery. I was "sold" on this hermitage--rather unnecessarily large but I have ideas for that aspect--due to the view onto nature and the peace and quiet of the area. So be it and thanks be to God for the seller having dropped the price dramatically, at which point my agent and I pounced on it. All went so smoothly and rapidly; the bank lender and agent opined when we were chatting at closing, that they'd never quite had one go so well and so fast. God chose this one for me! I'm so grateful to His Real Presence.)
I had the third MRI the pain doctor set up; this one is of the thoracic spine. At some point sooner than later, he will get the results, go over them with me (and I will ask for a recap of the lumbar and neck MRI's as I was too pained and also stunned by his saying I need surgery), and we will discuss his referral to surgeon. I will research in advance, being new to this area; and I also will ask for second opinion surgeons. However, I've come to accept that if more surgery to clear up bone spurs, spinal stenosis, and more bulging discs and compressed discs that have come over the years after the major surgery back in 1987 following 1984 life-altering car accident, then I of course would love to feel any bit better. That is all the pain doctor has to offer given how bad the MRI results, other than trying another medication he hopes will help any small amount during pain sieges.
So consecrated Catholic hermits or any hermit, still have to deal very much with the temporal, with people and professionals, with having a place to live and all that goes with life and living in this 21st century. I have to wash out cupboards, wait until Friday for a Shop Vac to arrive, sweep out lower cabinets and closet, unpack dishes and pots and pans, hang up a few clothes, put away bathroom items.
And soon, I hope and pray, I will unpack the marvelous library of rare and otherwise spiritual books on and by saints, mystics, hermits, spiritual masters and directors, religious order founders, and Scripture scholars. My library collection has been boxed for nearly six years due to the previous hermitage, Te Deum, being what I later learned a cosmetically covered "tear down" dwelling. Took five and a half years to gut and renovate, run out of money, and sell just in the nick of time. Praise His Real Presence for all providence and love!
This hermitage, Solus Deus, has a lovely bonus room upstairs that will be the chapel and place of prayer as well as artistic and creative endeavor. More on that another time.
For now, I share the following Scriptures read at Masses around the globe, a few days ago. These I will separate from the aspect of what not to be, to the aspect of how to be in God's sight, in His footsteps, in His love. So much is ours to choose, after all, which path, which attitude, which perspective, which way to live and be. God is Love, and turning to and trusting in God is that of LOVE.
I pray you can apply these somewhat hard truths of the two aspects and ways of choosing, in your own circumstances and life. This selection has been quite meaningful to me as of late.
Jeremiah 17:5-8
Thus says the LORD:
Cursed is the one who trusts in human beings,
who seeks his strength in flesh,
whose heart turns away from the LORD.
He is like a barren bush in the desert
that enjoys no change of season,
but stands in a lava waste,
a salt and empty earth.
Blessed is the one who trusts in the LORD,
whose hope is in the LORD.
He is like a tree planted beside the waters
that stretches out its roots to the stream;
it fears not the heat when it comes;
its leaves stay green;
in the year of drought it shows no distress,
but still bears fruit.
God bless His Real Presence in us! Little children, let us love God above all things and others as ourselves!
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