Catholic Hermit: More on Being a Guest

Ill with too much pain today, despite increased meds.  I still hope to get some manual labor accomplished, but must ask the Lord for His will and graces to get the body obedient to cooperating physically.

In the meantime, someone replied that what I'd written the other day really helped in a situation on-going. The person writing to me had some understandable frustration of "guests" not really being "guests" in the usual sense.

Because the spiritual admonition to "Be a Guest" renews itself in my thoughts, I responded as such.  Perhaps these details might help others think more practically of how we can strive to be guests while on this earth not only with others, but above all for us to be guests of His Real Presence.

 (If too detailed and not helpful, of course, don't read; I'm sure most of us come up with our own life-practice points on how to "Be a Guest.")  I'm rather too ill right now although have other fresher ideas to share; so here is this response written yesterday that seemed to help the friend.

As for your resentment: God forgives you!  He KNOWS and UNDERSTANDS as your guests are not the usual "guests".  I was thinking yesterday--having been reminded of a locution years ago:  Be a Guest.  I heard it and saw it in the inner sight, written for emphasis.  We are to strive to live our lives as guests of His Real Presence (and I add Mary as Hostess to the Trinitarian HOST). 

Yet some people do not even know how to be guests when visiting others--including their parent/s.  And some, not even one own's children, at times do not know how to treat us as guests when we visit and are behaving as their guests as best we can.

Rather than guilt for venting about guests taking over, I consider it righteous indignation.  Perhaps it qualifies as justified and is probably a bit of "awe" that adults would come in and take over as if not only your spouse has memory issues, but as if you also don't know what needs to be tended in the house and regarding your spouse.  

Being a guest is to ASK, always.  Such as with the Lord, we should be in the habit as guests of His on this earth and in this life (and we will be guests in Heaven, as well, and purgatory, too).  We should ask permission of God more than not.

"Is this what You'd like me to have for breakfast?  Do You mind if I look at some news as long as I do so with the intention of praying for the world and the situations and people involved?  Is it all right with You that I don't make my bed or that I stay in it today--not feeling well?  Do You mind if I vent about people visiting who make a difficult situation more tense by doing as they think best without asking or conferring with me?  What would You like me to do with my life today?  What color of paint do You prefer for the walls--and do You mind if I paint them?  If not today, then when, Lord?  What and for whom do you want me to pray this morning?..." 

And a good guest always is offering thanks and giving praise.  

"Thank You for this wonderful food!  Thank You that I can get out of bed today!  Thank You that my son and I can take a trip and be away from 24/7 spousal care, in four days!  Thank You that I only lost $250 to the tree scam man; even though a bit late, caught the signals You were giving me that he was way overcharging.  Thank You for another nice neighbor I met.  Thank You for giving me the wherewithal to deal with flooding caused when a dementia-stricken spouse smashed a toilet in the middle of the night.  Thank You for the loving friendship of friends.  Thank You for someone sending a text this morning thanking me for doing them favors last week.  Thank You for guarding over children, grandchildren...friends, strangers, and enemies."

"I praise You for giving me life.  I praise You for letting me be a guest in Your earthly creation.  I praise You for all the conveniences You have allowed in my living in this time period.  I praise You for Mass and for being able to attend, one Mass at a time.  I praise You for your lovely Dwelling Place.  I praise You for clean air and water and doctors and medications.  I praise You for giving me a conscience so that I can be human and as such, vent and make errors; and I praise You for forgiving me and even smiling at my pathetic efforts to be more holy even when it seems I am far from the goal.  I praise You for teaching me how to pray and for always listening.  I praise you for being You, God!"

On my own personal part:  I've been concerned that I have NOT been living the mission that God wants of me.  I have not written nearly what I should nor as I should--having been drawn off at times in writing by the call-of-the-wild: the temporal realm.  I complain so much about pain--not at all heroic in suffering.  I have begged God to put in me yet again a great passion for the holy and for the spiritual life.  Yet this morning I wafted into the online news for awhile, and last night I wafted finally, unable to sleep well at first, into an Irish detective program set in the 50's.  What kind of guest--especially a consecrated hermit guest--am I?

Yet, my friend [to whom I responded], here we have another morning in which to be guests.  At your house, the temporal host/guest roles are reversed, but what can you do about it?  I guess focus on being God's guest more than being a temporal host, for your two guests are not at a level of grasping how it is to be temporal guests.  They are stuck in their denial that their parent is in failing health, definitely with increasing dementia; they are in denial that he has the typical phase of days and nights reversed. We can wish them well in their determination to change that.  Medical professionals and nursing home staffs will be appreciative to learn of a "sundowner's" cure. 

And, thank God that you can vent the frustration of basically having to be a temporal guest in your own home for awhile longer.  But the real blessing is to rise above.  Be a guest of His Real Presence on a grander and highly spiritual level yet with tangible ways to practice being His guest.  I am trying to do that here, although it is not the same as what you are contending with.  I do not have temporal guests having taken over as host or hostess as a distraction to my practicing being God's guest here in Solus Deus.  Yet I struggle practicing being a guest of God, all the same.

As for your feelings of guilt, I think you'd have to be quite concerned if you were not aware that you vented the frustrations and instead held it in to a point of anger.  Your venting brought a sense of guilt for doing so; your conscience is prodding you to find a nobler path.  Yet the venting brought forth the needed laughter--like an overfilled tire in which the stem cap is temporarily removed and air released.  No tire blow out; your health is not ruined from pressure and stress.  And, you wisely then count the blessings in the situation.  

It is amazing how matters in life can cause us to be THANKFUL!    And you are thankful for the upcoming trip extra much because of the added difficulties of guests having confused their roles. Yet it will be refreshing for you to have a few days' respite from care of a spouse whom you love but who is not the same any more, nor to be a temporal host to guests with or without role reversal.  

There are so many aspects involved when tending a loved one who has become mostly a guest due to being mentally or emotionally in another "place".  The aspects include others entering in--guests yet who forget they are guests when emotions or personalities fill the temporal space.  All the questions and the attempts to fix matters get tossed into the situation.  What are the answers?
  

Who knows? 

God alone knows!  We are His guests and, as you so beautifully phrase it: "It's all right, I just work here."  Yes, a good guest offers assistance by asking, "May I help you with this or that?"  We offer to help but then listen; we help out with what the Host wants of us, wills of us.  We want to chip in out of gratitude for being guests of His Real Presence in His Creation.  But we do not overstep our place, nor do or say more than what He wills and desires.  Mostly He desires LOVE.

What I must learn right off the top, as God's guest: not to reach in with suggestions or helps or ideas even if someone is foolish enough to ask me!  God knows best and will answer people, usually through His Living Word and in other ways--sometimes through people who say things or offer insights.  But that is not for me to do with ones who have repeatedly been in the habit of writing or calling me with that which they do not intend to alter, anyway--but share and ask perhaps in some subconscious need--but knowing I will respond over and over.  Answering at great length or intensity, and then over-investing myself is my fault.  

This is a form of host-guest role reversal in which I am no longer a guest of God in a human request or conversation. I forget that I just work here....  I forget that I am to be His guest, and as a guest, to defer to and confer with the Host--His Real Presence--as the best answer and advice to offer others.  Pray!  Remind others we are guests of His Real Presence and to inquire, each of us, of our Host Whom we are to love above all things and to love others as ourselves.

After all the above in real-life scenario of a response to someone about being a guest, the Holy Spirit has surely  prompted numerous, personal thoughts of how to implement the Be a Guest reality into your daily lives and relationships.  It is a vast topic with endless, marvelous, holy potentials.

God bless His Real Presence in us, and us in this life and His Life, as HIs guests!

Catholic Hermit: Lent, the Second Scrutiny

Was reminded when subsumed into Mass, during the sermon, about this Lent's Second Scrutiny.  The First Scrutiny a week or so ago, is the digging deeply and unveiling of our personal sins, repentance, and resolve to change out of those sins.  The Second Scrutiny, currently, is to scrutinize our communal and societal sins.  (We can't simply pass the buck to generalized "others" forever!)

I've been wondering about what a hermit (and with increasing back pain and the accompanying nerve pain and muscle weakness when one's spinal cord it being squeezed to not much of a cord) can "do" to change my communal and societal sins for which I am part, and in part responsible.

I can vote, yes--be it federal, state, local, or even home owners' association matters.  I can remain alert to and updated on what is occurring in society and the world.  (For this, a hermit needs some discipline; I'm still working on that aspect--not to spend too much time perusing news online or listening to live stream newscasts.  A brief review of headlines and articles ought suffice, but again, I'm working on this discipline for news nowadays is produced full of viewer "hooks"!  Give the bait and hook us, then reel us in!)

Then I can pray about the situations in the world and community, in the neighborhood, even, within the family--extended and primary and then of the self.

I also considered the comment sections after news articles, and sometimes I leave comments along with many other comments.  I try to leave comments that remind us to pray for the victims, the situations, the circumstances--whatever is impetus for the article in the first place.  I strive to be a voice of reason, peace, love and of Christ.  I'm still working on this aspect, also.

(Regarding my occasional comments, or on the better comments of others, clicking "like"--I had, before reviewing the purpose of the Second Scrutiny, considered my commenting, etc. to be not necessary or a good purpose.  But now I consider that in a very small way, anonymously, I am building up society for good, reminding of prayer and of right versus wrong, as well as to turn our thoughts to God.  I just have to make sure I don't succumb to less-than Godly comments.)

I've considered being at Mass now, as a means of helping uplift the community--the Body of Christ.  I must die to myself to be there, for one thing.  I risk being injured if others try to awaken me from the mystical state; and I risk my own personal embarrassment of whatever it is if someone observes what might seem quite odd, someone immobile and as if deeply asleep during Mass.  However, being there now seems what the Lord has willed through this priest, and when in that deep mystical state, hopefully the prayers of soul with God and whatever bits of temporal thoughts are exchanged, are uplifting souls around me, including my own soul.

Sending texts in response to a couple friends, might be making reparation for communal and societal ills.  Especially can comments address those in bad marriages or struggling with stubborn pride that causes them to, for example, not seek medical attention for treatable conditions that could make others uncomfortable in their presence.  Yet, how much to comment?--that is a necessary question to ask.  Perhaps comment as responding to an article on a communal or societal news article.  Turn the matter to what might be God's view, or at least point to God and the Word, to peace and prayer and love.  And always promise to pray.

Praying is a huge "action" in striving to uplift and build a more holy community and society from one person to millions worldwide.

I also am reminded of a locution I received now 18 or so years ago.  Be a guest.  [For more in depth discussion of "Be a guest" I refer readers to that blog post of  Dec. 18, 2014, although I warn it goes into more detail yet in a stream-of-consciousness style for which I probably need to pray for the grace to improve in succinctness!]

In fact, I'll just post it below--and you can skim or scan or not bother.  I had cut-and-paste from an email I'd sent someone who was having difficulty getting along with people visiting as well as in general, with those around the person in social groups.  While at the time I wrote the thoughts, it was Gaudete Sunday in Advent, perhaps it is as applicable to this Laetare Sunday in Lent!  You probably can get the connection of how we mortals can quite simply and daily improve our community and society and world by the attitude and action of being a guest.  

"Had the idea with that locution, or it seemed, that "be a guest" was to be considerate as a guest would be, and to realize that as guests, we are temporary and "borrowers" of anything that God has created, done for us, or is providing.  So we develop a behavior and mentality of gratitude for all, like guests ought to do, at least!  

And to be more demure, perhaps--not create arguments with our Host (and Hostess, Mary), and to go along with what others desire, while also expressing for what we hope and would like, when asked, or even if not, if it is not presuming or out of line or demanding.

"To simply be polite, as a guest would (or should), is another aspect.

"The point may be to LEARN more how to behave as a guest in this world and life and among people, and then learn to be considerate and thoughtful, more and not less.  So the natural self, or being ourself, would be a very nice and thoughtful self, and more compliant with God's world and His allowing us to be a guest here on earth, and a guest in His abode, which He has made inside us.

"'Be a guest' had to do with that, and learning the behaviors and thoughts at least interiorly--at least to ponder it--and to train ourselves in a better way of viewing God and HIs Creation, and of being a guest among many guests, even if others do not realize they are guests, too.  We are all guests here.  

"So consider, also, as personal example, terrible complaining.  Now, would one do that if a guest in someone's house here on earth?  Would one feel lonely and betrayed?  No.  Would one not brush teeth daily, or shun certain foods offered us, or be picky in any way?  Would we demand help with projects?  

"Guests do ask for things, though, of the host and hostess.  Where are the glasses, or for a drink of water?  A towel?  Would it be all right if we left for the afternoon, but will be back for supper?  Apologize that weI might not get in until late? That kind of thing.  Is there something the host or hostess would like us to do to help out during our stay?  Can we help with dishes?  Does the host or hostess mind if we read this book on his or her shelf?

"See?  It is just a different perspective when we place ourselves in this life as guests of His Real Presence and His Mother.  We'd ask permission a lot more.  There was a package in the mail, and it was from friend in SoCal. She sews beautifully and has good financial means, and she delights in gifting and wrapping everything to perfection. [This hermit[ noticed of the two, wrapped packages, in the smaller box a potential for something edible.  Decided it would be an Advent Gaudete gift, and to open it then and there!  Was ravenous, having forgotten to eat while focusing on insulation board and figuring out wall placements upstairs in the hermitage.  

"Sure enough, there was a candy bar tucked along with some work gloves in the small package. Downed the Payday: sugar and peanut energy.  Then realized had not even asked God if He'd mind the opening of the package before Christmas, as an Advent gift.  Instead, [this hermit] told Him what was going to do. 

"Am always seeming to be telling His Real Presence, not asking.  Even if would ask within, "Do You mind if...this or that?"   Would be better than not asking anything at all, and just going and doing, or telling Them.  I think this hermit would stop some unguest-like actions, if would learn to ask God as the Host, and/or Mary as Hostess.  

"Surely His Real Presence, by bringing to the conscious mind the years-past locution, wants this hermit to re-ponder "Be a guest"--mostly for attitude and perspective shift that will then concretely improve active beingness of body, mind, heart, and soul.

"In practicum, [for the hermit's spiritual friend's current visitor to her home], it would be rather fascinating to experiment being a guest while at the same time doing for a guest.  For one thing, if we observe someone who maybe is not the best guest, we can learn what not to be as a guest, and then change it to how we should be as a guest.  And then reflect upon it with God as our Host and Mary as our Hostess, for our stay here on earth.

"Back to being a guest ourselves, we would offer thoughts, actions, things to God, or we would offer to others as if they are our hosts and hostesses, through God.  Something like that.  So you are offering your guest supper this evening, even if he might not have the knack of being a guest in the way God would like us to be:  thoughtful, helpful, thankful, non-assuming, asking permission, checking in with the host's plans and schedule before making his own plans.

"You [the spiritual friend to whom hermit is writing] are right that God would want us to be ourselves--as even guests ought to be themselves...unless evil selves.  But being a guest of God is surely some different than being a guest of a human.  Being a guest of humans is not being a guest of One Who Is Eternal Perfection.  

In general, though, the locution ["Be a guest"] is a lesson to teach more how we can better act and react, how we can better perceive others and the world around, and the world we are in, especially our inner world.  

"Guests have their personalities, but it is how they treat their Host and Hostess and the other guests, that is probably the point He was making.  It is a marvelous locution to ponder, though, and one to learn by and from, and to stretch us in positive growth.

"The shepherds were guests; and on another socio-economic spectrum, the wise men were guests.  Angels were guests.  All are guests of baby Jesus, Mary, and Joseph and even of the animals in their stable.  Their behavior and words were no doubt different than when on the hillside tending sheep, when in their Persian houses with servants, but not probably too different for the angels when they are glorifying God, for they glorified Him in the manger and as messengers to people of the birth of Christ.

"Yet, [this hermit] does not often consider its angel as a guest, always visiting me--a boarder for life who is trying to remind [this hermit] to glorify God, to adore Him, in every present moment. Plus, the guardian angel is a constant guest trying to protect and guide in temporal matters, yet all according to God's will.  So even difficult phases of life are ordained, and we are guests and yet hosts and hostesses of our guardian angels, if we view it as such from a personal perspective.  But from God's perspective, we are the guests, and the angels a constant messenger inviting us to "Be a guest."

"We cannot expect or even look to other people to be guests, or for them to grasp the concept of being a guest of God's on this earth.  But [this hermit] was told to be a guest, and it has not much practiced or been a guest.  

"In a current situation [in the hermit's life], am asked to go into civilization and help someone paint woodwork, on the weekend.  Traffic is more then, and thought about going a day earlier.  But a guest would arrive when the hostess asks, or has in mind, not necessarily when the guest decides to arrive.  Of course, we might kindly ask if another time is all right, explaining our reasons.  

"But for the most part, with human hosts and hostesses, we may do well to practice considering them to be as God, as we are told to see God in others.  Still, when and as God is our life's and being's Host, then the stakes are much higher and different than dealing with imperfect humans!  And this must be remembered when we are human hosts to others...."

Thus concludes some of this hermit's thoughts on "Being a guest." Hope you readers ponder aspects and develop your own thoughts on the topic, and that you find "being a guest" a marvelous exercise in spiritual reality and life.

God bless His Real Presence in us!  May we love one another as guests of His Real Presence, as children visiting His Abode for He has come to make His abode in us, and we in Him.

A Hermit's Thoughts on Being a Guest

Was reminded of a locution, twelve or so years ago:  "Be a guest."  For the past couple of days the words resurfaced--no doubt this hermit's guardian angel as messenger of His Real Presence, sent to remind of aspects this hermit has not so well been living for quite some earth time.  

Below are flow-of-consciousness-type thoughts shared in emails with a spiritual friend.  They are rambling thoughts, in part, and also answer some questions and comments from the friend, over the course of our e-conversation.

"Had the idea with that locution, or it seemed, that "be a guest" was to be considerate as a guest would be, and to realize that as guests, we are temporary and "borrowers" of anything that God has created, done for us, or is providing.  So we develop a behavior and mentality of gratitude for all, like guests ought to do, at least!  

And to be more demure, perhaps--not create arguments with our Host (and Hostess, Mary), and to go along with what others desire, while also expressing for what we hope and would like, when asked, or even if not, if it is not presuming or out of line or demanding.

"To simply be polite, as a guest would (or should), is another aspect.

"The point may be to LEARN more how to behave as a guest in this world and life and among people, and then learn to be considerate and thoughtful, more and not less.  So the natural self, or being ourself, would be a very nice and thoughtful self, and more compliant with God's world and His allowing us to be a guest here on earth, and a guest in His abode, which He has made inside us.

"'Be a guest' had to do with that, and learning the behaviors and thoughts at least interiorly--at least to ponder it--and to train ourselves in a better way of viewing God and HIs Creation, and of being a guest among many guests, even if others do not realize they are guests, too.  We are all guests here.  

"So consider, also, as personal example, terrible complaining.  Now, would one do that if a guest in someone's house here on earth?  Would one feel lonely and betrayed?  No.  Would one not brush teeth daily, or shun certain foods offered us, or be picky in any way?  Would we demand help with projects?  

"Guests do ask for things, though, of the host and hostess.  Where are the glasses, or for a drink of water?  A towel?  Would it be all right if we left for the afternoon, but will be back for supper?  Apologize that weI might not get in until late? That kind of thing.  Is there something the host or hostess would like us to do to help out during our stay?  Can we help with dishes?  Does the host or hostess mind if we read this book on his or her shelf?

"See?  It is just a different perspective when we place ourselves in this life as guests of His Real Presence and His Mother.  We'd ask permission a lot more.  There was a package in the mail, and it was from friend in SoCal. She sews beautifully and has good financial means, and she delights in gifting and wrapping everything to perfection. [This hermit[ noticed of the two, wrapped packages, in the smaller box a potential for something edible.  Decided it would be an Advent Gaudete gift, and to open it then and there!  Was ravenous, having forgotten to eat while focusing on insulation board and figuring out wall placements upstairs in the hermitage.  

"Sure enough, there was a candy bar tucked along with some work gloves in the small package. Downed the Payday: sugar and peanut energy.  Then realized had not even asked God if He'd mind the opening of the package before Christmas, as an Advent gift.  Instead, [this hermit] told Him what was going to do. 

"Am always seeming to be telling His Real Presence, not asking.  Even if would ask within, "Do You mind if...this or that?"   Would be better than not asking anything at all, and just going and doing, or telling Them.  I think this hermit would stop some unguest-like actions, if would learn to ask God as the Host, and/or Mary as Hostess.  

"Surely His Real Presence, by bringing to the conscious mind the years-past locution, wants this hermit to re-ponder "Be a guest"--mostly for attitude and perspective shift that will then concretely improve active beingness of body, mind, heart, and soul.

"In practicum, [for the hermit's spiritual friend's current visitor to her home], it would be rather fascinating to experiment being a guest while at the same time doing for a guest.  For one thing, if we observe someone who maybe is not the best guest, we can learn what not to be as a guest, and then change it to how we should be as a guest.  And then reflect upon it with God as our Host and Mary as our Hostess, for our stay here on earth.

"Back to being a guest ourselves, we would offer thoughts, actions, things to God, or we would offer to others as if they are our hosts and hostesses, through God.  Something like that.  So you are offering your guest supper this evening, even if he might not have the knack of being a guest in the way God would like us to be:  thoughtful, helpful, thankful, non-assuming, asking permission, checking in with the host's plans and schedule before making his own plans.

"You [the spiritual friend to whom hermit is writing] are right that God would want us to be ourselves--as even guests ought to be themselves...unless evil selves.  But being a guest of God is surely some different than being a guest of a human.  Being a guest of humans is not being a guest of One Who Is Eternal Perfection.  

In general, though, the locution ["Be a guest"] is a lesson to teach more how we can better act and react, how we can better perceive others and the world around, and the world we are in, especially our inner world.  

"Guests have their personalities, but it is how they treat their Host and Hostess and the other guests, that is probably the point He was making.  It is a marvelous locution to ponder, though, and one to learn by and from, and to stretch us in positive growth.

"The shepherds were guests; and on another socio-economic spectrum, the wise men were guests.  Angels were guests.  All are guests of baby Jesus, Mary, and Joseph and even of the animals in their stable.  Their behavior and words were no doubt different than when on the hillside tending sheep, when in their Persian houses with servants, but not probably too different for the angels when they are glorifying God, for they glorified Him in the manger and as messengers to people of the birth of Christ.

"Yet, [this hermit] does not often consider its angel as a guest, always visiting me--a boarder for life who is trying to remind [this hermit] to glorify God, to adore Him, in every present moment. Plus, the guardian angel is a constant guest trying to protect and guide in temporal matters, yet all according to God's will.  So even difficult phases of life are ordained, and we are guests and yet hosts and hostesses of our guardian angels, if we view it as such from a personal perspective.  But from God's perspective, we are the guests, and the angels a constant messenger inviting us to "Be a guest."

"We cannot expect or even look to other people to be guests, or for them to grasp the concept of being a guest of God's on this earth.  But [this hermit] was told to be a guest,, and it has not much practiced or been a guest.  

"In a current situation [in the hermit's life], am asked to go into civilization and help someone paint woodwork, on the weekend.  Traffic is more then, and thought about going a day earlier.  But a guest would arrive when the hostess asks, or has in mind, not necessarily when the guest decides to arrive.  Of course, we might kindly ask if another time is all right, explaining our reasons.  

"But for the most part, with human hosts and hostesses, we may do well to practice considering them to be as God, as we are told to see God in others.  Still, when and as God is our life's and being's Host, then the stakes are much higher and different than dealing with imperfect humans!  And this must be remembered when we are human hosts to others...."

Thus concludes some of this hermit's thoughts on "Being a guest." Hope you readers ponder aspects and develop your own thoughts on the topic, and that you find "being a guest" a marvelous exercise in spiritual reality and life.

God bless His Real Presence in us!  May we love one another as guests of His Real Presence, as children visiting His Abode for He has come to make His abode in us, and we in Him.