Another glorious day.
Began with difficulty in trying to read the excerpt from what I think an article, sent by text message from the priest-hermit, but forced my body to get up and hunt for my late grandfather's magnifying glass, passed down to his son, my late dad, and passed down to me. I love the DNA aspects, plus the reality of the three of us generationally having need of a magnifying glass for our aged eyes! (My phone will not allow for various photos and sent uploads, to enlarge by the tap-and-spread method.)
I rejoiced in the thoughtfulness in the message being sent me--article seemingly published by a priest, and topic is that of how our small world-views can be shaken by something greater. Basic but true. However, as I then turned to this day's Mass scriptures, the Holy Spirit enlivened my mind, heart, and soul in each three readings, especially the Gospel, Mark 4:35-41.
"On that day, as evening drew on, Jesus said to his disciples: 'Let us cross to the other side.' Leaving the crowd, they took him with them in the boat just as he was. And other boats were with him. A violent squall came up and waves were breaking over the boat, so that it was already filling up. Jesus was in the stern, asleep on a cushion. They woke him and said to him, 'Teacher, do you not care that we are perishing?' He woke up, rebuked the wind, and said to the sea, 'Quiet! Be still!' The wind ceased and there was great calm. Then he asked them, 'Why are you terrified? Do you not yet have faith?' They were filled with great awe and said to one another, 'Who then is this whom even wind and sea obey?'"
Who of us has not absolutely loved this Scripture? To me, it seemed the Lord Himself was speaking to me, as one of the disciples in the boat who becomes unsettled and as I term it as having, "the heebie-jeebies," when my mind and heart feel buffeted and tossed about, in disarray, even when I know myself that the devil is trying to unnerve and shake the inner peace Christ always is offering, lovingly bequeathing His peace to us.
I had texted in response to the priest sending me the portion of article, and I mentioned that my phone does not usually allow enlargement of photos and downloaded articles, but the magnifying glass helped. I offered my email instead of texting. (But the next couple of months for him will be filled with contending with medical situations, and then his leaving the area. We will see how it goes; my focus for him now is to pray for his surgeries and health.) I assured him that the peace of Christ is in me, although the past 10 days had been as the disciples' boat upon the storm-rent sea. The Lord is so good to all of us, in providing what we need, when we need it.
So when I next read a selection from a sermon by St. Augustine on today's Gospel [cited above], I knew the Lord was providing me, unexpectedly, His direct guidance and influence upon my very soul. The following sounded so deeply within, and given to me with such ease of access and readability, that I knew immediately Jesus chose for me to come upon St. Augustine's words, in the present moment. Christ is the One who directs us, always, and the holy souls we encounter and who weave in and out, off and on, in our lives, such as the alter Christi and holy, spiritual acquaintances, are themselves Christ's directing us in one of His various means of teaching and guiding.
He chose portions of St. Augustine's Sermon 63, to touch my soul this morning, and to remind me He, Jesus Christ, is directly in charge, is my spiritual savior and teacher, my Lord and my All. What is so marvelous about our having Christ directly (as He is for each of us), is that He is ever present, ever available, every answering our questions. We simply must remain in His peace and calm, in order to hear Him, to be aware of His presence, to be alert to what He is teaching us in the various modalities (and those around us) that He utilizes.
Enjoy Jesus' utilizing His holy, beloved, penitent and convert saint--Augustine--and what Augustine teaches us in his Sermon 63, 1-3.
"With the Lord's grace, I am going to talk to you about today's gospel. With God's help, I also want to encourage you to not let faith sleep in your hearts in the midst of the storms and swells of this world. Without any doubt, the Lord Jesus Christ exercised his power over sleep no less than over death, and when he was sailing on the lake, the Almighty could not succumb to sleep if he did not want to do so. If you think he did not have this power, it is because Christ is asleep in you. If on the contrary, Christ is awake in you, your faith is also awake. The apostle Paul said: 'May Christ dwell in your hearts through faith' (Eph 3:17).
"So Christ's sleep is the sign of a mystery. The people in the boat represent the souls that go through the life of this world on the wood of the cross. Furthermore, the boat is a figure of the Church. Yes, truly, all the faithful are temples where God dwells, and the heart of each one of them is a boat sailing on the sea. It cannot go down if the mind maintains good thoughts. You have been insulted: it is the wind that is whipping you. You became angry: it is the rising tide. Thus, when the wind is whistling and the tide is rising, the boat is in danger. Your heart is in danger, it is shaken by the waves. The insult aroused in you the desire for vengeance. And you took vengeance, thus giving way to the fault of another, and you were shipwrecked. Why? Because Christ went to sleep in you, and that is to say, you forgot Christ. So awaken Christ, remember Christ, may Christ awaken in you. Think of Him."
Ah, so beautiful, so appropriate, so directly what I needed to read and absorb. And while I was shaken by the waves, while I was disparaged and my words twisted, and while I was whipped around by the devil and wondering how to handle situations, thankfully I took no vengeance, for there is none to take. I did not give way to the fault of another, but I certainly was unsettled and buffeted about, and my focus was not solely on Christ but rather distracted by the winds and the rising tides; the boat was in danger...yet not shipwrecked, not this time.
But there will be other storms, more violent seas. Yet all the more we must keep Christ awake in our hearts and allow Him to be in us, be for us, guide and teach us, directly. We must look to him always, not forget Christ is through us, with us, in us...and we also may be, if we stay awake and keep Christ awake in our minds, hearts, and souls--we may be through, with, and in Christ, also. All of us, awake in Christ and keeping Christ awake in our souls, as we are in His boat, His Church, all of us the Body of Christ, in our ever-present, ever-active, ever-knowing, ever-powerful, ever-merciful, ever-loving: Christ Jesus!
Confession late afternoon was also glorious. In the three minutes or less or tiny bit more, I expressed my concerns of sins--letting the devil distract me and whip me around for ten days, off and on, yet all the more turning to Christ. But it is the in between's--the allowing myself turn my gaze from the Lord, to have His peace bequeathed to me seemingly lost for time periods, such as the disciples in the boat were frightened when the waves threatened to capsize. Yes: threatened; the boat was in danger of overturning, but it did not; the disciples awoke Jesus with their cries of concern. Didn't He care they were in danger? Wasn't He going to do something about it?
My confessor suggested another way of approach, and of my reflecting upon anything that I have inadvertently done to exacerbate the winds and waves. And he recommended a means of most practical yet highly spiritually powerful offering of the boat and the storm, to God in the sacrifice of the Mass. Brilliant and effective! He also said that none of us can avoid the distraction the devil causes, 100% of the time. Yes, we are human, and we are frail, and we do tend to, in the distractions of temporal life, get caught up in the storms and allow Jesus to be as if asleep in our hearts.
I need physical, human sleep right now. Today I also was able to get out more of the checker-board, pink-and-white tile from above a shower-tub insert in the St. John the Baptist bathroom. I am going to ask my angel and the Holy Spirit, the Virgin Mary, and all the angels and saints, to pray for me, that even while I physically sleep, that I keep Jesus awake in my heart, in my soul, day and night.
As for my mind and body, while on earth I will know earthly pain; the Lord told me that years ago; and the mind and body are more easily distracted, which--yes, is a form of pain because we take our thoughts and gaze off Jesus. But our hearts and our souls, he is through, with, and in, and He is wide awake and ready to be for us directly. We can have Christ directly.
God bless His Real Presence in us! Thank you, Jesus, for being in us always, for staying awake in our hearts and souls, for directing us through the seas and the storms, keeping us in the boat, keeping the boat safe and secure--the Body of Christ in Christ's Church.
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