I've not walked in three days now. Easy to glum onto weather alerts, to then have an excuse for what is very good exercise.
The morning's Lyft rides to the dermatologist and back provided a new Prius (small, low to ground, but interesting conversation with young man) and return trip in a Toyota Tacoma--another miracle in another truck. Also a good conversation even if not getting to a spiritual depth that the young Lyft driver provided.
However, I am beginning to again focus on aspects of hermit vocation as The Catechism reminds: my life a silent preaching of the Lord.... Let Christ be visible without my self being in the way. I can tell this will be an engaging and delightful practice! It is a relief in so many aspects, to die to self: just let go, even let the pain be more than what am "I"--actually nothing!
The pain has made itself known, regardless, thus my spending the rest of the day prone on icy pad on bed, other than trash out to street, a most short walk, an unexpected call from a cousin who asked help with ideas on how to word an invitation for an open house she and her husband will host for their son and his bride.
(This is an example: my cousin calling, and not at all in her mind, a thought of my being a consecrated Catholic hermit, or what my thoughts were at the time, or the very spiritual discussion with the first Lyft driver this morning--a young Catholic man most intent on striving to do God's will, to help make the world a better place, and to "be" prominent as a success in this life for God and for others. I have been praying about some of the young man's intent, and asking the Holy Spirit to give him the patience he mentioned to me he needs for his desires of goodness, to which I mentioned to the young man I also need patience in my yearning for an abiding union with Christ, or even more, although I did not state it, my desire for Christ to come take me with Him. Well, I find Jesus in my pain; and that must suffice for now! None of these thoughts did my cousin detect--nor of my prayers for a stronger grasp of the virtues, acquired, and of greater grasp of the infused virtues, and also of the gifts of the Holy Spirit: May I praise God for all and utilize them far better and according to His Holy Will! I offered encouragement and options for the invitation, and when asked, offered advice in words she mentioned to me years ago, relative to "Go along to get along" when a specific desire of her son did not match with what she thought regarding alcohol or no alcohol at the celebratory event being planned.)
Throughout my reading and praying in the silence of solitude here at Solus Deus, and permeating the existing and relating and listening to nurse, doctor, Lyft drivers, cousin from afar, and bits of sorrowful news of another school shooting, the desire of my heart and soul remains in mind: Pray for wisdom. It is the foremost prominent gift of the Holy Spirit, given me with the other six gifts at my Confirmation, and part of the kernel within the seed of sanctifying grace.
I also ask to have the infused virtue of prudence primed and pumped within my mind, heart, and soul and for my temporal life to receive and utilize an increase in acquired prudence. The two--acquired/learned and infused/spiritual virtues ought be in balance. And it is written that prudence is the director or impetus of implementation of the other moral virtues: justice, temperance, fortitude.
This portion of Scripture from the Book of Wisdom caught my outer sight and inner senses yesterday. Today I'm sharing with you, Dear Readers, because for you, as well, the Lord speaks to you and teaches you His Mind and Heart--unites you in Him--through His Living Word. Perhaps not in this present moment are you beseeching greater understanding and infusion of virtues and a fullness of the particular gift of Wisdom from the Holy Spirit, but you understand well how such desires and prayers for His gifts and graces will be desired, for God wills it! Deus vult!
"To you, therefore, O [human soul], are My words addressed
that you may learn wisdom and that you may not sin.
For those who keep the holy precepts hallowed shall be found holy,
and those learned in them will have a ready response.
Desire therefore My words;
log for them and you shall be instructed."
~ Wisdom 6:7-11
To culminate my headachy thoughts with yet another desire of my heart, I add this verse--an exhortation--from the New Testament, 1 Thessalonians 5:18 which was yesterday's Holy Mass antiphon prior to the Gospel reading.
"In all circumstances, give thanks,
for this is the will of God for you in Christ Jesus."
Given the pain level despite medication and icy pad, I have not done the challenging reading today that is so helpful--Garrigou-Lagrange's The Three Ages of the Interior Life. I might attempt even a paragraph or page later, but I've begun the biography recommended by the professor, the one I had not already read: The Life of St. John of the Cross by Fr. Bruno de Jesus Marie. The Introduction is written by the late Jacques Maritain; what a treat but also challenging in the quality of the writing.
The reader can come to know these authors and their writing styles through the pages; what may have seemed challenging becomes a pleasure. Scripture and other excellent spiritual writings can move the mind, heart, and soul beyond mental discursive meditation and into a contemplative experience. Through the Holy Spirit's power, author, reader, and subjects-- the minds, hearts, and souls connect between the words on the pages. The thoughts become transformative by and in the Holy Spirit, between writers, readers, persons and their lives, thoughts, and souls. We all meet in His Real Presence beyond the temporal, and in aspects beyond conscious knowing. Mysterium tremendum!
With that, I'm encouraged to enter into John of the Cross' loving friendship and tutelage, along with Fr. Bruno de Jesus Maria, and those others to be introduced of John's life on earth. All now spirit and in the Holy Spirit we gather and love God in Himself and one another. John and I (and no doubt each of you readers) have suffering in common, and we share a love of Christ and desire for union in Him, as well.
God bless His Real Presence in us!
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