Catholic Hermit: Hermit Communications

A strange aspect of being a hermit is the evolving nature of the vocation.  It should not seem strange, of course, for all of our lives we evolve--bodily, mentally, emotionally, spiritually.  Our vocations evolve, as well--single, married, consecrated life of church, ordained.

This aspect of my hermit life has occurred in the past:  that of how much correspondence and how often, and with whom.  There are three aspects I must consider in whatever communication (verbal or written.  The writing can include emails, blogs, and postal mail).   One aspect is what effect and good for His Real Presence, or the Holy Trinity:  Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.  Another aspect is the person or persons with whom I am communicating.  And the third aspect is of myself.

Questions are necessary, when I get right down to the pith of communications.  Is what I am writing of benefit to any or all of the three involved in the communications?  Am I helping the other human being/s to live their vocations and to draw closer to Christ; am I helping myself to remain true to my vocation and to draw closer to Christ?  Am I glorifying God the Father, the Son Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit; am I fulfilling His will for me and others?

In the past year or two I've had to curtail my email correspondence with certain persons.  One involved someone much younger who really needed the help and guidance of a therapist and help with trying various medications.  Also, that person needed to develop friendships with other married young people and with other mothers, and to focus on her young family.  I had nothing more that I could repeat, actually, and the problems were increasing but also repetitive.  

My vocation is not that of therapist, and I really do not think the Lord (at least at this time or possibly ever) desires me to be a spiritual director of individual souls.  I am to pray, to praise God, to live my vocation, be a disciple of Christ, suffer, and write of the spiritual and mystical life I am living, as these and other facets unfold.

Another person I had to curtail was one who was becoming dependent upon me for other reasons than the above person.  This attachment on the person's part was hindering the person's own reliance upon His Real Presence as well as hindering confidence in that person's abilities to learn, to read, to pray and discern what and how the Holy Spirit divulges the sevenfold gifts--including knowledge, understanding, and wisdom.  As for me, I was becoming frustrated, and my own time and energy and thoughts were not as focused on what God wanted of me in my own spiritual growth and development.

Recently there was another situation.  This was one in which I allowed out of my own weakness in my increased suffering.  The more severe the suffering, the greater my temptation to have "easy" distractions rather than to "find Him in my pain" or to wait in the stillness of suffering with Christ on the Cross--to rest in the pain in silence and penance, or to praise God through psalms which are so strengthening to me in pain sieges.

I also was intrigued with having an email correspondence with a person who has mystical experiences.  At first I thought what a gift the Lord was providing.  But quite soon I realized that the content of discussing and/or answering questions regarding mystical experiences was not really necessary.  There are books or lives of mystics to read to gain whatever information helpful, although yes, I did answer questions that seemed to make sense and helped the person.

But then there developed a sense of the person becoming attached to corresponding, and while short emails, were becoming frequent.  And my flaw and weakness tends to be feeling as if I must respond when someone writes; and I am a writer, and as a writer, I can write and write.  Plus, writing is a form of pain distraction to me, as well.  So once again I can easily slip into chattering about this and that as a means of pain distraction rather than resting in the stillness of suffering, and silently clinging to Christ on the Cross, or to wait in silence--listening to what the Lord might desire to tell me in the intimacy of His and my shared agony.

Also, this person expressed he/she was fairly sure a hermit; and while had not made formal vows privately nor publicly, he/she had an experience of type of commitment to hermit life with the Holy Trinity.  Yet I was sensing loneliness in this person.  A good aspect of our correspondence, for me, is the realization that I am not at all lonely!  This reality pleasantly surprised me, for it took me by surprise. It is nothing I had considered, consciously or otherwise.  I am actually quite content being in the silence of solitude, hidden from the eyes of others, in general and specific, other than whom the Lord brings to me or me to them.

Thus, at first I did think the Lord had brought this person to me via this little window to the world--my laptop.  And perhaps He had; but it was to be but a relatively brief bringing and then a going.  There are lessons for each to learn.  I was hindering this person from discerning more a hermit vocation and living the spiritual life to the degree a hermit is called.  This means being alone but not lonely; attached to His Real Presence, the Holy Trinity--Father, Son, Holy Spirit.

I recommended the person be in more contact with spiritual director (more than two phone calls a year which the person mentioned) or a confessor to discern more carefully the hermit vocation, to discern if vows to be public or private, and to then develop personalized vows and rule of life.  Either way, public or private, then the person must profess also the three evangelical counsels and to live out what the Church asks of public or privately professed, consecrated Catholic hermits.  The graces to live the hermit life then will flow in abundance.  

God's strength will fill the person to help keep from temptation to attachments, to not be lonely, to desire to do spiritual reading which will bring answers, to have the Lord's additional company and communication through lectio divina (reading and pondering, meditating, on Scripture), as well as to be open to whatever way the Lord might utilize the person's hermit vocation.  Not all hermits remain hermits for life; there are many instances in history of the Church's hermits in which the Lord calls the eremite out of that vocation and back into the world for some specific purpose or life mission.

As for myself, I knew I was merely distracting myself with the on-going correspondence--although I realize in total it lasted ten days or so.  Seemed much longer.  I was becoming wearied of my responses, and weary of my own--wrong, it is--sense of obligation to respond, and weary of discussing the hows of mystical experiences for, again, there are answers to these questions and more in the books written by or about mystics.  And, the person's spiritual director could be called or seen in person, or the others who had helped the person in the past in explaining the mystical experience that is beautiful indeed. 

Then, also, I realized I am not prone to having people attaching to me, or trying to reach in and help or suggest this or that regarding my suffering.  That, too, wearies me for then I must explain more about the temporal aspects of the suffering as well as then explain that the suffering is also for a spiritual reason, and that no, there is not going to be a miracle healing for the Lord has purpose in this particular suffering, and yes, the surgery is necessary for not only spiritual reasons but definitely for temporal, physical reasons.  Yet, of course I understand and appreciate the kindness and desire to be helpful--but it simply was becoming a complication, a distraction, not good for me nor the other.

I must not hinder others in their spiritual lives nor their vocations, and I must not hinder myself nor my vocation.  Nor must I usurp the time and energy given me for praying, for suffering, and for fulfilling my mission.  In the past week since I ceased the extra emailing, I am noticing from the Holy Spirit increasing clues and assurances, and a direction in which to try, and to begin a means of fulfilling part of my mission.  My "shelf-life" is not long; time is passing.  I must focus on fulfilling these aspects of the mission the Lord sent me back (death experience years ago) to fulfill.

So even in corresponding, I recognize and accept that I can become what I call, being "over-peopled."  When this occurs, I take steps (and sometimes not that delicately) to explain the reasons for limiting or ceasing the interactions.  Actually, I've had people need to curtail me in the past--and I take it as a blessing from the Lord!  He knows when I need to be stripped down, curtailed, held back from too much attaching, too much over-people-ing others!

My purpose at this phase in my life is that of suffering mystic; the vehicle for my life and purpose is as consecrated Catholic hermit.  In earlier adult years, my life and purpose was that of human spouse and parent, and of course, mystic; then suffering single parent of children and mystic up until this later phase, perhaps my final phase.  Thus I must be true to what God wills of me as well as to in charity be true to and respect and encourage what God wills of others, once I see clearly, discern, and learn, also, from others what is their purpose and vocation in whatever phase of their lives.

[My mission is not quite synonymous with my purpose.  I am working out my mission with His Real Presence and with advisement, talking it over a bit, with a person or two whom God has provided.  The advisement regards the details of the what and how of what it is to try in fulfilling this mission.  The mission can require some "casting the nets in the water"--or stepping out in faith on the water, and the Lord then will take it from there.]

But back to hermit communications, all the above does not mean that I not communicate with others, that I not correspond via email and postal mail.  I do.  But it has to be what and with whom God chooses and wills, and for however long.  Yet I realize I now do not communicate frequently for lengthy periods of time, for the Lord has not willed that degree of communication from me with any one person.  No, it is more that the communication waxes and wanes and cycles in and out depending upon what are the other persons' spiritual needs.  

In times of crisis, there is likely to be more communication, back and forth; when the crisis resolves, then less.  Some will remain life-long correspondents, some not.  Those who remain life-long are chosen and ordained by the Lord to be thus, and me for them, as well.  We just never know for how long or for what purposes.  Correspondents can also weave in and out of one another's lives.  

For me, I doubt there will ever be a hermit with whom I will correspond; there simply is not that need.  The correspondents who now and then make contact with this consecrated Catholic hermit are not hermits, and they make contact for spiritual and practical purposes and needs.  Hermits generally turn to His Real Presence and their confessors or spiritual directors for guidance in their times of needs, in their crises, for their crises and needs are spiritual, or sometimes vocational issues.  Hermits turn to temporal specialists or family, friends for temporal needs and crises.  

I've turned to a family member recently to drive me to a medical procedure, to the parish nurse for locating some medical equipment for post-op recovery period and for meals after I return from hospital.  I've turned to various medical personnel including pharmacist, to line up medications I take--glaucoma drops, for example--so that I will have on hand what is needed during lengthy recovery time in which I will not be able to drive and handle my errands.  I will turn to two neighbor children to water the container gardens and mow the grass when I'm unable.  

Others turn to me for temporal type needs, as well.  In my case, I listen and encourage in whatever ways I am able, and I enter into whatever place or activity or concerns going on in their temporal, usually active apostolate lives.  These are people who are not hermits, not in the consecrated life of which those persons have a rule of life, have their vows to uphold, have responsibilities of living some form of horarium that is steeped in the practices and prayer, the ora et labora, of religious life.

I speak on the phone as I do when I correspond, in similar aspects of the temporal and spiritual.  While the phone calls are rare, I'm available.  Yet these current times provide rather good aspect for hermits as we have the benefit of texts and emails which are blessedly silent, may be read when we are not otherwise engaged, and the content can be concise.  Yes, concise is a challenge for me, as I am more a prose writer, not a headline journalist!

These are my thoughts on hermit communications....  I could write more, but this is more than enough.  God bless His Real Presence in us!