Christian Catholic Mystic Hermit: Gratitude and Praise of God

"It is the spirit that gives life, while the flesh is of no avail." 

         ~ Jesus Christ, Son of God 

I've accepted all the more that nothing much has to do with me.  In fact, when considering such as a hermit vocation, as any vocation, as in ourselves vis a vis God, nothing really has to do with ourselves, but all has to do with God.

One of my favorite conversations with Jesus that Catherine of Siena wrote in her diaries, was that of Him asking her who she thinks she is and who He is.  (I am paraphrasing the exact interchange between the two of them, and by interchange I refer to what I call "thought-flashing"--the interior, instantaneous manner in which the Holy Spirit or God or Jesus or those who are in eternity, on the "other side" speak and communicate."  The output of what Jesus explains to Catherine as to who we are and Who He Is, is stated succinctly, powerfully, and truthfully:  You are nothing, and I am All.

In some after-effect thoughts relating to another hermit who had for years detracted me and my writing, but evidently recently has forgotten all those blog posts and likely has removed or altered what the person wrote on the person's blog, which to me is not honest--but the odd thing is that the person continued to be in denial.  And the main point I've considered is:  none of it matters.  I wasted many blog posts over the 12  years of the person actively stalking and attacking my writing as the consecrated Catholic hermit I am according to the Church's guidelines and written statements of the hermit vocation, of the avenues by which one may follow and live out with both being in the consecrated life of the Church, in the eremitic vocation.  And none of that matters, either.

However, it was a lot of wasted energy, thought, and reaction to this other person, because no one cares, really, about the temporal, human-made structure, formalities, and externals of a hermit vocation.  No one cares if one is following one avenue or the other.   No one cares that this other hermit makes up terms and rules for living the hermit life or behaved in less than Christian manner in the written attacks and negative assessments of my personhood.  

That type of behavior is part and parcel of being a blogger.  There will always be those who are bothered that there is competition, of sorts, or someone else who may have reading audience, or who may point out a way of life that is approved by such as the Church, that the other disagrees with because the other may have a need to be viewed as an authority or has a need to be approved in a public way.  None of it matters.

No one other than the friends of that person care.  And certainly  no one I know cares about what type of hermit or even if a hermit.  This includes any number of Catholics.  I have come to laugh at the situation, and of ever having been bothered by this other hermit's writing or attempts to expose my identity, to stalk and essentially dox and pester.  

I reflected on this recently, just how pathetic it was, and also, though, what a waste.  I wasted time, energy, emotion, and attempts to get the person to cease and desist. Finally, I removed myself from writing much on externals of hermit vocation and have tried, at least, devoting to the inner core of what it is to be a Christian.  But the perspective is as a life and vocation lived as a hermit, who is also born mystic, and who has known various denominations for four decades prior to the Lord calling me into Catholicism, now nearly three decades (and a beautiful progression and story, that).

Once again:

"It is the spirit that gives life, while the flesh is of no avail." 

         ~ Jesus Christ, Son of God 

What really matters is not to do with hermit this or that. It's but a vocation, not our souls, not our ways of being, of living God's Law, the Law of Love.  No one cares what hermits write when it deals with externals or a canon law created by humans, or who can be called a Catholic hermit or not, based upon what a human deems correct or not, or anything at all to do with how advanced or at what level, or if one has progressed in this or that.  No one cares if I write or the other hermit writes, or that our vocational paths vary slightly, which is of little to no consequence to the full spectrum of our lives, especially that of our souls' eternal existence.

What matters to others is not even really a concern, as far as sharing our temporal lives. What matters is one's spiritual offerings, one's humility in sharing errors, one's thoughts on and attempts in living Christ's Word in the major and minor details of our daily lives, and in what God wills of us which is to follow His Greatest Commandment:  Love God above all things and love others as God loves (or love others as ourselves).

I might, before long, share in another format.  The idea came to fruition through a dear person, a loving soul who has interest and expertise, and one topic that the person emphasized is that of not allowing what others may say or react in what I may be sharing, to bother me.   That's the way of social media these days--can always be someone who becomes a detractor, a nemesis or several negative reactors.  There are always those who disagree or want to argue--especially when the topic has to do with God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit, Christianity, Scripture, and living one's life for God.

We do not matter, ultimately, other than to God.  But God matters in the details to the full spectrum of existence, and to us.  We are nothing; God is ALL.  Our temporal structure and system of doing, our human-kind made up rules and protocols are insignificant to the spiritual life, the Christian way forward, the beauty of worship and praise of God, of knowing that we live in God and He lives in us.  We are fed by Christ; we share His Body, consume and are consumed in His Real Presence.  We consume and are consumed through, with, and in Christ's Body and Blood: the full essence of the Holy Trinity of which we are born, led, taught, guided, forgiven, and especially loved!

And yet again,  

"It is the spirit that gives life, while the flesh is of no avail." 

         ~ Jesus Christ, Son of God 

How do we come to know His Real Presence intimately and in truth, beauty, and goodness?  How do we learn to love God above all things and to love others as God loves?  How do we encounter the Trinity in ways of faith, in the numinous as well as in the every day temporal realm?  What all constitutes this activity, experience, communication called "prayer"?  How do we learn to discern spirits; how do we learn to discern God's will for us?  How does Scripture, the Living Word of God, become interactive and very real in our daily lives?  How do we become born anew in the spirit, increase in faith, become one in Christ Jesus, experience union with God?

These and other manifestations matter.  Do we need to know at what personal phase or level of progression?  Do we need to have supernatural experiences?  Do we need to compare ourselves with others--or contrast ourselves, either or also?  Are we striving in religious structure, or are we striving in spiritual life of becoming one with His Real Presence?

These are considerations for what hopefully will come forth, but I may also share aspects of my own life background and lessons learned, ways in which God has been gracious as well as instructive, and also some consequences of veering off the narrow path, and His lovingly calling me onward.  There are truly things "like scales" invisible, but very real, as the Apostle Paul had fall from his own eyes, that can signify in each of us the holy action of the Spirit opening our eyes.  We have myriad such eye-openings, deeper conversions, when we come to the spiritual in existences, and begin to view as God views, not as the world sees, and to listen as God listens--not as we hear.

I'll let you know when the added sharing is up and available. In the meantime, we must remember to keep a loving sense of humor, and grasp that when we make waste and mistake by being culled off by the temporal.  What silliness can occur in the temporal goings-on of our egos and sensitivities especially to mistakenly think that we are more than the nothings that we are, and instead forget that God is ALL, and God Alone matters.  What God views and thinks of us is what matters; and the Holy Trinity Is and Are the point of reference and fullness of our sole and soul existence.

Now, back to gingerly putting some tiny conifers in the ground.  Grateful for the beautiful day and praising God for life even if the knee is bone on bone with eight weeks to go to full replacement, and the thyroid getting medication to help what had gone kaput, and the Arachnoiditis pain progressing as that is what happens with Arachnoiditis.  I praise God I can limp and have some bit of energy to feel the soil and spread the tiny roots of His creation in some exquisite, miniature trees!  

Praise God for His Word!  Praise God for the beauty of life and of others, despite the difficulties that may transpire in our daily interactions.  God bless His Real Presence in us!  Love in Christ's Love!

Thank you the forbearance of God's bounteous grace of God's being All, and of my being nothing.

And forevermore, to not forget:

"It is the spirit that gives life, while the flesh is of no avail." 

         ~ Jesus Christ, Son of God 

Catholic Hermit: St. Teresa of Calcutta on Humility

Love these thoughts on humility from No Greater Love written by Mother Teresa.  She writes, personally, from a heart of wisdom, grace, and total humility.  Expresses much of what I feel and experience, what so many of us feel and experience.  Know you loving, desirous-of-Christ readers will find the following inspiring, also!


"I don't think there is anyone who needs God's help and grace as much as I do.  Sometimes I feel so helpless and weak.  I think that is why God uses me.  Because I cannot depend on my own strength, I rely on Him twenty-four hours a day.  If the day had even more hours, then I would need His help and grace during those hours as well.  All of us must cling to God through prayer.  My secret is very simple:  I pray.  Through prayer I become one in love with Christ.  I realize that praying to Him is loving Him....

"People are hungry for the Word of God that will give peace, that will give unity, that will give joy.  But you cannot give what you don't have.  That's why it is necessary to deepen your life of prayer.  Be sincere in your prayers.  Sincerity is humility, and you acquire humility only by accepting humiliations.  All that has been said about humility is not enough to teach you humility.  You learn humility only by accepting humiliations.  And you will meet humiliation all through your life.  The greatest humiliation is to know that you are nothing.  This you come to know when you face God in prayer. 

"Often a deep and fervent look at Christ is the best prayer:  I look at Him and He looks at me.  When you come face to face with God, you cannot but know that you are nothing, that you have nothing."

Accept humiliations.  I suppose even appreciate them especially much for the gift of humility that they bring us.  I also appreciate Mother Teresa realizing that God used her (and no doubt still very much utilizes her in heaven) because she was helpless and weak.  This gives me great consolation, for I am so helpless and weak these days, and in actuality have been so all my life, despite the blessings of Jesus' graces and helping me through marvelous and unexpected means, angels, saints, and fellow human beings.

But Mother Teresa's secret is that she prays.  Let us all benefit from her secret and to pray and pray.  And along with prayer, let us praise God always, for praise can be inherent in prayer.  Our prayer can become praise, as much as pain can become prayer.  Can pain, then, become praise?  I will ponder this insight that came just now.  Praise God!

I also love that of knowing that the greatest humiliation is that I am nothing.  We all are nothing and we have nothing.  All Is God.  And that, dear spiritual friends and readers, for whom I pray and thank you for praying for me--for deeper conversions in God's will and to love God and love as God loves--is a truth for which I used to be and just recently again was criticized by someone who struck up a conversation with me.  

Many people do not like me to say or write that I am nothing.  But it is the truth.  Mother Teresa knew that truth and embraced it, and also embraced that we have nothing--all is God's, and if we "possess" any object, person, thing, thought, feeling, or someone, these are actually not "ours" but rather are lent us by God for a breath of temporal time.

God bless His Real Presence in us!  Praise God for any and all humiliations given us!  



    

Catholic Hermit on God's Omnipotent Providence and Present Moment Reality

From James 4:13-16 comes the truth of God's living word of God's complete omnipotent providence and our present moment reality.

"Beloved:
 Come now, you who say,
 'Today or tomorrow we shall go into such and such a town,
 spend a year there doing business and make a profit'--
 you have no idea what your life will be like tomorrow.
 You are a puff of smoke that appears briefly and then disappears.
 Instead you should say,
 'If the Lord wills it, we shall live to do this or that.'"

It is so true that while we make mental plans, have dreams of goals of what we think and plan for the future, we really do not know, nor can we ultimately count on any temporal aspects of life.  

Of course, we humans do tend to function in forward-thinking, future-goal mode.  Is it arrogance, pride, that causes us to place ourselves in position of "calling the shots"?  

I suppose pride is the root cause behind the effort.

Last night, late in his time zone, my son called.  He had been celebrating with colleagues the end of a television season as well as a new position that astoundingly seemed to come "out of the blue."  As we were discussing the good fortune and turn of events, we also discussed what he'd be doing in his job, when he would begin, and the major upgrade it is from what in a few days will be his former place of employment.

At one point, the call dropped as he excitedly spoke of the details.  I'd been pondering the truth of the above Scripture for a couple days, relating it to my own existence in the unknowns of bodily pain sieges and also knowing full-well, that any mishap could totally alter the momentum of what is, for me, and of what is next.  

When I called back after the sudden call failure, the thought struck that my son could be mugged, walking late at night in the city.  I did not think that had occurred--but the thought came all the same as a reminder of how we don't know from moment to moment, really.  Maybe he will begin the new position, or not.  Maybe in the two weeks or so of time off between jobs he will find his planned, solo cycling venture come to reality, or not.  

Truly, we are a puff of smoke.  In the fullness of the ages of human existence, we appear briefly on earth, some for a split-second and some for several seconds if a long life.  Then we are off the face of this earth, like a failed cell phone call spontaneously, unexpectedly dropped.  We just never know.  That is the point.  We do not know; God knows.

For years (and perhaps the reminders and process is easier if one has a bodily limitation that is unpredictable), I have taken on the statement when there is something I'd like to do or others would like of me.  I add on this reminder:  God willing, and body able.  

Yet I continue to challenge the Order of the Present Moment, obviously, or I would not be frustrated or disappointed such as the past week when another and particularly grueling, pain siege set in.  For one thing, this nothing consecrated Catholic hermit's eldest sister and husband were going to be in the area for a day and had made arrangements to stay in a hotel, just for the purpose of seeing me.  I'd not seen this sister for 14 years.  I was unable to manage to make the day's reunion.

The reality of God's omnipotent providence and the truth that all we do "know" is our present moment, is also the reality of our spiritual existences.  However, in the spiritual, we are even less aware of what is and what is next.

For this aspect, I find that what Jesus told Catherine of Siena to be quite worthy of imbedding within my core essence.  Jesus told her, "You are nothing; I am ALL."

Nothing is less than a puff of smoke.

Yesterday is what we can view; but in yesterday we also have no power in its providence, and the present moments are past.  Yet we can learn from yesterday if there is some lesson to be gleaned, positive or negative in import.  

Perhaps the best lesson gleaned is that we are nothing and God is ALL, and that God's omnipotence will determines our lives.

A daughter just called.  Her husband is having an "out of the blue" interview in an hour.  It is another bizarre happening of which there was no forewarning and of which the outcome is naturally unknown to any of us, including that of the interviewer.  

I am going to try to rise (God willing and body able) and head up the stairs to get the tile mortar blade I was using yesterday (into the evening), and of which I totally forgot.  It will take extra effort to clean it, and I have no idea of the condition of the mortar in the unclosed container.  I was multi-tasking yesterday:  switching off and on with hooking up water hose to soaker hoses, emptying water buckets that catch the hose-drips from faulty spigots, harvesting-simmering-freezing batches of fresh rhubarb, tiling bathroom vanity backsplash full up the wall, and gathering piles of weeds for the burn pile.

And all the while, whether or not body able (but God surely wills it--Deus vult!) this nothing-puff-of-smoke-human-consecrated-Catholic-hermit prays and praises, trusts, adores, serves, and loves God-Who-Is-All.