Catholic Hermit: Focus on Jesus and His Dad

Am doing all I can to out-psyche my nothingness who prefers bed to anywhere else in the world.  It is the most comfortable spot for this pained body, especially the spine.  I set the pain doctor appointment intentionally in the morning to force myself up and out.  Was couple days ago and had to be in bed rest of day due to to having to drive to orthopedic specialist the day before.  These were the first times I've been out from hermitage in I think three weeks--since the intrathecal pump trial external injection.  Not even sure of dates and days and weeks, which is as well.

This morning I forced up to drive to Lowe's because they've been wanting me to pick up the bathroom cabinets and some additional pieces special ordered for the upstairs' bathroom renovation.  Hard to believe--ordered them back in February before COVID-19 became our existences.  When at Lowe's, had to wait two hours while they looked for four cabinet boxes and one end piece--and could not find the other two packaged items:  toe kick plate and scribe molding.  

I wanted to remain outside due to the place being jam-packed with customers, and most did not wear masks, but there were far more than when I did a curbside pick-up at Home Depot--was that three weeks ago, also?  However, I had to remain inside by the pro-desk for the bulk of the time waiting because I was told the employee looking for the  rest of items would be "right back," and then I'd be "checked out."   I wore a mask but wished I'd had a tighter fit one, or had brought the ventilator type mask I used for asbestos removal and insulation install.  Maybe seems like over-kill, but had phone call that the spouse of the older friend who passed from COVID three days ago, also has it.  Their adult daughters are removing her from the retirement facility that has been horrible in lack of care and their decision to not have staff wear masks until later on in the pandemic.

While waiting, I observed customers and employees.  There is much that I could describe, most distressing as to humanity's seemingly becoming increasingly "out for him- or herself"--survival of the fittest, to each his own.  It seemed as if the masks (many employees wore them, a good thing) were somehow causing an effect of employees thinking they had some invisibility.  The place was more packed than I've ever seen a store!  Finally, I said to give up on trying to find the added items ordered, and while they loaded my truck I commented on how busy!  The pro-desk man who was helping load said that today was nothing like last Monday (when we were supposedly still on lockdown), as it was their biggest sales day on record.

So much for Slowing the Spread....  I was finding it difficult to focus on Jesus.  I also considered St. Joseph, His earthly dad.  I somehow had thought that perhaps it being the first day of some major restrictions lifted, that people were shopping even more than a Black Friday sales promotion of which I've heard stores are packed--but no, not if last Monday this Lowe's store had it's highest sales ever.  I kind of figured the shoppers were not there thinking about St. Joseph the Worker--inspired to get to work on projects of their own or the contractors and carpenters there picking up supplies for their jobs.

Inner feelings can easily be riled if one does not focus on Jesus.  I recognized just how easily that can occur, especially with added thoughts and changes of ways of being that the coronavirus has brought to all peoples everywhere in the world.  We must remind ourselves that this is not forever.  At least this particular strain of COVID-19 is not forever.  There will be a vaccine; there already is a promising antidote medication that is fast-track approved by the FDA and being used as of today.

But how difficult it is, now that I am trying consciously focus on Jesus, to keep at bay the distractions that can start to roil within.  Divisiveness can take hold and even root in!  I became irked by customers who were not wearing masks and not social distancing.  For pity's sake!  When a customer without a mask rested his arm, hand, and upper body on the large cabinet box.  (Does he not know that the virus can stay on cardboard surfaces for a day or more?)   Mercy!  I was shocked with my surprise reaction, for I did not think I'd feel these frustrations and temptation to being testy, snappy.

How this pandemic has caused thoughts and concerns we'd never anticipated just two months ago!  The divisiveness comes to the fore when we realize there are those who are trying to be compliant and do all possible to do what will slow or even stop the spread of COVID-19, and those who do not take it seriously are feel in good enough health or not in older age bracket that it does not matter to them;  and there are those who don't like anyone such as government federal, state, or local to tell them what to do.

Got home with the bulk of cabinet order, and spoke with someone who had struggled with similar thoughts but has had more situations of being disappointed as is not a hermit and has many friends and acquaintances--sadly too many who outright say they don't care, or that this is just how it is and people weaker will simply die.  We spoke of learning much about others and ourselves through this pandemic situation, and perhaps life will not ever truly be back to how it was BC (before Covid) because for one thing, we will have discovered the character of other people, and they us.  Differences in character and nobility will also cause division among people; some friendships will alter or dissolve altogether.

I mentioned a major way forward is forgiveness, but the other also mentioned that there will always be a knowing of disappointment in those who choose to have been more selfish than selfless, who were out for themselves and not to uplift and support communally in cooperation for doing what protects others and self, for the greater good of all.  

I then mentioned the admonition a couple days ago:  Focus on Jesus.  This focusing on Jesus, while more of a challenge--as I'm realizing especially when there are distractions of all types--even ones that come to me in the silence of solitude and stricter separation from the world when in the hermitage.  But to FOCUS ON JESUS as Son of God and Lord and Savior, as well as Jesus as one who was born, lived among mankind, and had a mom and dad, and the dad teaching the Son the carpentry/stone mason trade--helps all the more in having all else fade in comparison to when not focusing on Jesus.

A neighbor man noticed me backing my truck into drive and the boxes on it. I finished the conversation, as the man and his son came over to unload it for me.  What an unexpected blessing from Jesus and His dad--of that I'm convinced!  I was going to use the ramp I'd made of wood and brackets to hook onto the Precious Blood pick-up truck tailgate, and slide and push the boxes into the house--other than I knew there'd be no way I could probably slide the large cabinet off the truck without a miracle assist from my guardian angel and also St. Joseph.  But God Provided yet again through the dad and his son from next door....

Was rare for me to have some cash, but I'd recently turned a year older and elderly aunt had sent $20.  Perhaps the dad can treat his wife and seven children to some milkshakes with it; it won't go far, and he did not even want to take that, but St. Joseph and Jesus would have been paid for their work and rightly so.  My back is so appreciative! In fact, in honor of St. Joseph and Jesus on this Solemnity of St. Joseph as worker, I cut out more hunks of carpet and pad and carried to trash bin, and then after resting some, started spray painting a bookcase for The Priests Room upstairs, and finally planted some geraniums and petunias in three hanging baskets left over from last summer.

So much easier focusing on Jesus in Solus Deus Hermitage--but I know not to be duped in thinking I've caught on.  The devil will not want people focusing on Jesus because there is peace and joy, there is perspective and understanding, there is forgiveness and wisdom and faith, hope, and love no matter the world's disruptions and disappointments, crises and pandemics the world over and right within dwellings and the families therein.

Today is the first day I can recall since surgery last July, that I have been out of bed for this long...or so it seems.  Thanks be to God despite how the body might feel tomorrow.  Right now is bad enough with the high pain level, and thus lengthier blog post.  Yet I want to also include this portion of what Pope St. John Paul II said in a May 1, 2003 General Audience, regarding St. Joseph (the Worker).

"Today is also a wonderful occasion to reflect on the importance of work in the life of the human person, the family and the community.  We are made in the image and likeness of God, we participate with God in the work of maintaining and sanctifying His creation.  We work with Jesus; Jesus said, 'My Father is always at His work to this very day, and I too am working' (Jn 5:17).

"Every day St. Joseph, as a carpenter, provided for the family's needs with manual work.  Thus the Church rightly points to him as the patron of workers."

"The dignity of the human person is constructed through work, and in the light of this truth, we can clearly perceive the fundamental connection between the person, work, and society.  Human activity--the Second Vatican Council recalls--proceeds from the human person and is ordered to the person.  According to God's design and will, it must serve the true good of humanity and allow 'man as an individual and as a member of society to cultivate and carry out his integral vocation' (cf Guadium et spes, n. 35).

"In order to fulfill this mission, a 'tested spirituality of human work' must e cultivated that is firmly rooted in the 'Gospel of work,' and believers are called to proclaim and to witness to the Christian meaning of work in their many activities and occupations (cf. Laborem exercnes, n. 26).