"It is the spirit that gives life, while the flesh is of no avail."
~ Jesus Christ, Son of God
I've accepted all the more that nothing much has to do with me. In fact, when considering such as a hermit vocation, as any vocation, as in ourselves vis a vis God, nothing really has to do with ourselves, but all has to do with God.
One of my favorite conversations with Jesus that Catherine of Siena wrote in her diaries, was that of Him asking her who she thinks she is and who He is. (I am paraphrasing the exact interchange between the two of them, and by interchange I refer to what I call "thought-flashing"--the interior, instantaneous manner in which the Holy Spirit or God or Jesus or those who are in eternity, on the "other side" speak and communicate." The output of what Jesus explains to Catherine as to who we are and Who He Is, is stated succinctly, powerfully, and truthfully: You are nothing, and I am All.
In some after-effect thoughts relating to another hermit who had for years detracted me and my writing, but evidently recently has forgotten all those blog posts and likely has removed or altered what the person wrote on the person's blog, which to me is not honest--but the odd thing is that the person continued to be in denial. And the main point I've considered is: none of it matters. I wasted many blog posts over the 12 years of the person actively stalking and attacking my writing as the consecrated Catholic hermit I am according to the Church's guidelines and written statements of the hermit vocation, of the avenues by which one may follow and live out with both being in the consecrated life of the Church, in the eremitic vocation. And none of that matters, either.
However, it was a lot of wasted energy, thought, and reaction to this other person, because no one cares, really, about the temporal, human-made structure, formalities, and externals of a hermit vocation. No one cares if one is following one avenue or the other. No one cares that this other hermit makes up terms and rules for living the hermit life or behaved in less than Christian manner in the written attacks and negative assessments of my personhood.
That type of behavior is part and parcel of being a blogger. There will always be those who are bothered that there is competition, of sorts, or someone else who may have reading audience, or who may point out a way of life that is approved by such as the Church, that the other disagrees with because the other may have a need to be viewed as an authority or has a need to be approved in a public way. None of it matters.
No one other than the friends of that person care. And certainly no one I know cares about what type of hermit or even if a hermit. This includes any number of Catholics. I have come to laugh at the situation, and of ever having been bothered by this other hermit's writing or attempts to expose my identity, to stalk and essentially dox and pester.
I reflected on this recently, just how pathetic it was, and also, though, what a waste. I wasted time, energy, emotion, and attempts to get the person to cease and desist. Finally, I removed myself from writing much on externals of hermit vocation and have tried, at least, devoting to the inner core of what it is to be a Christian. But the perspective is as a life and vocation lived as a hermit, who is also born mystic, and who has known various denominations for four decades prior to the Lord calling me into Catholicism, now nearly three decades (and a beautiful progression and story, that).
Once again:
"It is the spirit that gives life, while the flesh is of no avail."
~ Jesus Christ, Son of God
What really matters is not to do with hermit this or that. It's but a vocation, not our souls, not our ways of being, of living God's Law, the Law of Love. No one cares what hermits write when it deals with externals or a canon law created by humans, or who can be called a Catholic hermit or not, based upon what a human deems correct or not, or anything at all to do with how advanced or at what level, or if one has progressed in this or that. No one cares if I write or the other hermit writes, or that our vocational paths vary slightly, which is of little to no consequence to the full spectrum of our lives, especially that of our souls' eternal existence.
What matters to others is not even really a concern, as far as sharing our temporal lives. What matters is one's spiritual offerings, one's humility in sharing errors, one's thoughts on and attempts in living Christ's Word in the major and minor details of our daily lives, and in what God wills of us which is to follow His Greatest Commandment: Love God above all things and love others as God loves (or love others as ourselves).
I might, before long, share in another format. The idea came to fruition through a dear person, a loving soul who has interest and expertise, and one topic that the person emphasized is that of not allowing what others may say or react in what I may be sharing, to bother me. That's the way of social media these days--can always be someone who becomes a detractor, a nemesis or several negative reactors. There are always those who disagree or want to argue--especially when the topic has to do with God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit, Christianity, Scripture, and living one's life for God.
We do not matter, ultimately, other than to God. But God matters in the details to the full spectrum of existence, and to us. We are nothing; God is ALL. Our temporal structure and system of doing, our human-kind made up rules and protocols are insignificant to the spiritual life, the Christian way forward, the beauty of worship and praise of God, of knowing that we live in God and He lives in us. We are fed by Christ; we share His Body, consume and are consumed in His Real Presence. We consume and are consumed through, with, and in Christ's Body and Blood: the full essence of the Holy Trinity of which we are born, led, taught, guided, forgiven, and especially loved!
And yet again,
"It is the spirit that gives life, while the flesh is of no avail."
~ Jesus Christ, Son of God
How do we come to know His Real Presence intimately and in truth, beauty, and goodness? How do we learn to love God above all things and to love others as God loves? How do we encounter the Trinity in ways of faith, in the numinous as well as in the every day temporal realm? What all constitutes this activity, experience, communication called "prayer"? How do we learn to discern spirits; how do we learn to discern God's will for us? How does Scripture, the Living Word of God, become interactive and very real in our daily lives? How do we become born anew in the spirit, increase in faith, become one in Christ Jesus, experience union with God?
These and other manifestations matter. Do we need to know at what personal phase or level of progression? Do we need to have supernatural experiences? Do we need to compare ourselves with others--or contrast ourselves, either or also? Are we striving in religious structure, or are we striving in spiritual life of becoming one with His Real Presence?
These are considerations for what hopefully will come forth, but I may also share aspects of my own life background and lessons learned, ways in which God has been gracious as well as instructive, and also some consequences of veering off the narrow path, and His lovingly calling me onward. There are truly things "like scales" invisible, but very real, as the Apostle Paul had fall from his own eyes, that can signify in each of us the holy action of the Spirit opening our eyes. We have myriad such eye-openings, deeper conversions, when we come to the spiritual in existences, and begin to view as God views, not as the world sees, and to listen as God listens--not as we hear.
I'll let you know when the added sharing is up and available. In the meantime, we must remember to keep a loving sense of humor, and grasp that when we make waste and mistake by being culled off by the temporal. What silliness can occur in the temporal goings-on of our egos and sensitivities especially to mistakenly think that we are more than the nothings that we are, and instead forget that God is ALL, and God Alone matters. What God views and thinks of us is what matters; and the Holy Trinity Is and Are the point of reference and fullness of our sole and soul existence.
Now, back to gingerly putting some tiny conifers in the ground. Grateful for the beautiful day and praising God for life even if the knee is bone on bone with eight weeks to go to full replacement, and the thyroid getting medication to help what had gone kaput, and the Arachnoiditis pain progressing as that is what happens with Arachnoiditis. I praise God I can limp and have some bit of energy to feel the soil and spread the tiny roots of His creation in some exquisite, miniature trees!
Praise God for His Word! Praise God for the beauty of life and of others, despite the difficulties that may transpire in our daily interactions. God bless His Real Presence in us! Love in Christ's Love!
Thank you the forbearance of God's bounteous grace of God's being All, and of my being nothing.
And forevermore, to not forget:
"It is the spirit that gives life, while the flesh is of no avail."
~ Jesus Christ, Son of God
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