A friend emailed this commentary written by the Bishop Basil of Seleucia (?-c.468), from his Sermon for the Resurrection, 1-4. The bishop's description of Jesus with Thomas after Jesus resurrected and Thomas doubted unless he could see for himself, reminds me of another example and reason why having mystical experiences is not necessarily all that lofty. But I'll write more on this after the following excerpts.
[Jesus said to the Apostle Thomas:] "Put your finger into the marks of the nails. Put your hand into my side; do not be unbelieving any longer, but believe.
"Then Thomas touched him and all his mistrust fell away. Full of genuine faith and all the love owing to God, he cried out: 'My Lord and my God!' And the Lord said to him: 'You believe because you have seen me; happy are those who have not seen and yet believe!' Thomas took the news of the resurrection to those who had not seen. Draw the whole earth to believe, not by its own sight but at your word. Go through peoples and cities far away. Teach them to carry the cross rather than weapons on their shoulders. Only proclaim me: they will believe and worship. They will demand no other proof. Tell them they are called by grace and, with your own eyes, behold their faith. Truly, blessed are those who did not see and yet believed!"
We can elicit from Jesus' own words to Thomas, that it is blessed for those people who have not seen and yet believe in Christ. Faith, hope, and love are the three theological virtues, the greatest of these being love. But faith is crucial in our spiritual lives, and faith is strengthened by God in many ways--individually, personally, and also in universal ways, communal worship, being part of the Body of Christ.
Thomas needed to "see" and to "touch" in order to believe that Jesus had resurrected from the dead. He did not take the word of the apostles who had seen Jesus appear before them, when Thomas was not with them. So Jesus allowed Thomas to see Him, and caused Thomas to touch his hand and side wounds. Yes, it was a powerful event--a mystical experience--that Thomas experienced. Yet Jesus emphasizes how great it is for those who can believe without needing or asking for such proof.
Bishop Basil of Seleucia comments on this event between Jesus and Thomas. He exhorts those people in the Bishop's time period and place, to do as Thomas did--go out to all the world and cause people who have not seen [who essentially go through life without a mystical experience or very few, or who don't recognize the reality as such if they do experience something super ordinary] to believe based upon their word that it is so, to believe in Christ because of the power of what the witnesses relate is true. "Tell them they are called by grace."
So it is for those of us who have had mystical experiences, be it one, several, or myriad--mystical experiences of one or a variety of types . We are called to go out physically or even such as through the internet (as is this consecrated Catholic hermit's window to the world and mode of sharing with whomever stumbles upon or even seeks my site); We are to draw others to believe in Jesus Christ, in His Real Presence among us, through, with, and in us as we are in Him when we believe in Him. We are to draw others to believe in Jesus through our words, our words of what we know, what we have seen, felt, heard, what we believe--that we believe Jesus Christ is our Lord and Savior.
This is part of the responsibility for those of us who experience the mystical, the mysterium tremendum of God. We are to utilize what we have experienced of the reality of God the Father, Jesus the Son, the Holy Spirit--of angels, saints, heaven, hell, purgatory, of death, of eternal life. We must use words to explain and to share, to cause others to believe in Christ--by the power of our words, our sharing.
Some will listen, some not; some will have the capacity to believe, others not. Yet we are to go out and try. It is a daunting responsibility, especially when in our temporal times, people are all the further from trusting in the numinous, the unseen. Clerics in the Church are yet prone to discouraging mention of the mystical events, the realities of the mystical life or experiences that God destines for some people on earth. Having such mystical experiences is not an easy row to hoe....
Yet another aspect surfaces, regarding why some people have mystical experiences and others do not, or have one or two standout mystical experiences compared to those who have numerous. I consider myself one such person, a mystic who has experienced numerous mystical experiences--some which were witnessed and others not, but all told to my late spiritual father or a priest or two at times when my spiritual father was not available, to help with discernment.
As I look back on my life, and the when and how of the various mystical experiences, a major aspect of God allowing them in my life is now obvious as a means to bolster my faith for what was to come. And what was to come, after some major mystical experiences, were trials and persecutions and great sufferings.
Had it not been for the transverberation of my heart, I'd not have had the courage to follow through with my confirmation. Had it not been for a major spiritual event occurring during my private confirmation, I'd have weakened several times in my life as a Catholic, prior to my private profession of vows as a Catholic hermit in the Consecrated life of the Church. The persecutions became intense and severe, lasting for several years, off and on, involving different groups and individuals, Catholic and non-Catholic, lay persons and priests, in different parishes and locales.
Prior to my conversion, had it not been for locutions foretelling me of events to come, or vivid dreams in which I was shown events and situations, I'd have had a hard time enduring and even surviving, such as in my death experience. Even now, I'd not have come through a painful ordeal had it not been for insights given me during some pain sieges.
So in their own way, for someone weak as I am, weak in faith, the mystical experiences were deemed necessary by His Real Presence, to bolster me for major life sufferings and trials. That in itself is humbling, for it shows that mystical experiences are graces given to people who otherwise are too weak to endure by faith alone. Consider this, please, if you are reading this and still wishing for some super ordinary spiritual event to be visited upon you.
It can seem so powerfully exciting--until one realizes that something heavy-duty is going to come at some unknown time but before long, and that the uplifting and glorious mystical experience will be exacted in every ounce of mystical feeling and mystical memory possibly to be squeezed from the mystical experience. Could I dare say, even a pound of flesh is taken?
I recall one night when St. Joan of Arc appeared to me by the daybed in which I then slept in a rental house--a parish's unused property that I was allowed to rent after some painful, temporal experiences which left me without a place to live. So as a corporeal entity--visible in life-like form, a corpus--Joan of Arc stood by my daybed, around 2 a.m., as I was roused from sleep to witness her there. She did not speak aloud. It was obvious who she was by her temporal appearance, age, garments, hair, sword, and armor.
She gave me two items, though. These she said what they were through inner-thought flashing as means to communicate. She placed five gold, chevron bars on my left shoulder; they were for courage. She placed around my neck--reaching over my head--a delicate gold chain upon which was a round piece of gold, shaped with a simple design, of which she thought-flashed it was an "amulet"--for my protection.
So yes, was it exciting? Of course, having Joan of Arc be there in that upstairs bedroom and give me the gifts--so real as to be touchable yet not touchable in the temporal sense. They are with me yet; these types of mystical adornments are as real if not more so than tangible matter, but they remain invisible to others, or so to most others. There may be some person out there in the world who might be given the ability to see such objects on others, but I'm sure there would have to be some major reason why His Real Presence would deem that necessary. They were and are for me to see and to know from whom they came to be placed upon me, and why: courage and protection.
After she left, I did not fall back asleep for awhile, as my mind was sifting through what all this could mean. Not two weeks later I found out why I'd be given gold bar chevorns for courage and a gold amulet on chain for protection. Mercy! What an ordeal I was called upon to handle, to deal with, to report and be risked in various ways, and to be persecuted later on, yet it was a task from which I could shrink away. It was a crucial task involving the Church, of course, and clerics and lay persons, and much stress and persecution aimed at me would follow. That temporal assignment heralded the beginning to the end of my time in that area,, that diocese, and from the small cadre of loyal friends and my beloved spiritual father.
So there is great suffering that can be exacted from those who are given mystical experiences. At the time of the experience, one can be so uplifted as to not dream of how hard it could become. And that is for a good reason, for would I have followed through with what was asked of me, what was wrung out of me, painfully so, and would lead to my temporal demise, of sorts, from parishes and my homeland?
I have often thought, when someone or other who happened to find out about some mystical experience--mostly, really, the ecstasy during Mass--and became envious that I'd have such an experience: Could you cope with the pain and suffering involved? I think of Jesus asking James and John when they wanted special privileges: Can you drink the Cup of which I must drink?
Considering the mystical experiences--some which were to bolster with courage, strength, protection, faith, and zeal for love of God, and others which were consolations following some tremendous suffering--I realize that it would be difficult for anyone who is married or close to children, or very interactive with others such as in work place or active, corporal works of mercy, active in a parish--to have such mystical experiences.
It can become too other worldly. It can become too treacherous and too painful for those around the mystic with such missions and assignments. It can require packing up and leaving, or living out of one's car for awhile, or having to leave one's hometown, or going without the support of a spiritual director for awhile, or being turned upon by those loved and trusted, or having people being pulled away so that one has to go through some temporal aspects very much alone.
But His Real Presence and one's angel, and various other angels and saints and family and friends on the other side are always with us. But we are not allowed the consolation always of knowing their presence or their help. But always, when the going gets very rough, His Real Presence does reach in--usually in some mystical way that is hidden to others and is between the mystic and His Real Presence. So there again--it is a type of responsibility, for there is no one really to tell and no one who really needs to know, other than it can help to confide in one's spiritual father.
Mostly, the mystical experiences that come as consolations for a job done or suffering endured, are to be kept as treasures within the soul, in the intellect and will and memory, to draw them forth later on as needed, when the suffering, persecutions, sorrows, unknowns, and further assignments require greater faith and hope and love than what one thinks is even possible.
So you see, mystical experiences are not for everyone, and there are reasons why and why not. They seem glorious, and they are truly so in many ways--but yet there is also the reality that they are quite painful and exacting, and are connected with trials, sufferings, and difficult assignments. In this, they can be rather isolating in a temporal sense; yet one is never lonely. That is where these mystical experiences can provide a boost to faith when the going gets rough.
I've had people drop out of my friendship due to the mystical ecstasies during Mass. That's the way the cookie crumbles, as is said. One friend, a male, had the honesty to tell me several years ago that he'd gone through a period of being very envious of me for the mystical state during Mass. He said he'd even prayed, asking God if he could experience it just one time! That's all he asked--just one time! And the man also told me he'd distanced from me as a result of his envy. Oh, I knew that--it all is obvious when someone withdraws friendship, or the glances given, or the silence and coldness.
But the man apologized as he was divulging his feelings and thoughts, after the fact. He said once he started to see how other people were treating me, the hard time priests were giving me, the parishioners' gossip and rumors, and the physical abuse from some--he realized he would never want to have to go through what I was going through simply from a mystical state during Mass.
I'll conclude with this reminder from Bishop Basil of Seleucia. He reminds how great it is to believe due to faith, to believe from the words shared by others, to not have put the finger into the marks of the nails used to secure Jesus to the cross. These people are blessed to have not seen but believe in great faith!
Yet, also are those others, not usually many, who are of the body of Christ--those who for reasons only His Real Presence knows and chooses are like Thomas, shown Christ, shown the super ordinary personages and experiences. These persons, called mystics, are those whose lives and souls are utilized by Him for often painful assignments and missions that He understands and determines will further His Kingdom somehow, somewhere, sometime--now or later, in this world or the other.
But somehow, it does seem, that Jesus as well as Bishop Basil emphasize how blessed and prized are those who live out their lives in blind faith, in faith that defies need for mystical events. Yet we live out what lives we are given, what assignments, what missions, what ordinary or super ordinary graces God deems for each of us.
"This is the army The Lord raises; these are the children of the baptismal font, the works of grace, the fruit of the Spirit. They have followed Christ without having seen him; they sought him and believed. They recognized him with the eyes of faith, not those of the body. They have not put their finger into the mark of the nails but they have bound themselves to his cross and embraced his sufferings. They have not seen the Lord's side but, by grace, they have become members of his body and have made his words their own: 'Happy are those who have not seen and yet believe!'"
[Jesus said to the Apostle Thomas:] "Put your finger into the marks of the nails. Put your hand into my side; do not be unbelieving any longer, but believe.
"Then Thomas touched him and all his mistrust fell away. Full of genuine faith and all the love owing to God, he cried out: 'My Lord and my God!' And the Lord said to him: 'You believe because you have seen me; happy are those who have not seen and yet believe!' Thomas took the news of the resurrection to those who had not seen. Draw the whole earth to believe, not by its own sight but at your word. Go through peoples and cities far away. Teach them to carry the cross rather than weapons on their shoulders. Only proclaim me: they will believe and worship. They will demand no other proof. Tell them they are called by grace and, with your own eyes, behold their faith. Truly, blessed are those who did not see and yet believed!"
We can elicit from Jesus' own words to Thomas, that it is blessed for those people who have not seen and yet believe in Christ. Faith, hope, and love are the three theological virtues, the greatest of these being love. But faith is crucial in our spiritual lives, and faith is strengthened by God in many ways--individually, personally, and also in universal ways, communal worship, being part of the Body of Christ.
Thomas needed to "see" and to "touch" in order to believe that Jesus had resurrected from the dead. He did not take the word of the apostles who had seen Jesus appear before them, when Thomas was not with them. So Jesus allowed Thomas to see Him, and caused Thomas to touch his hand and side wounds. Yes, it was a powerful event--a mystical experience--that Thomas experienced. Yet Jesus emphasizes how great it is for those who can believe without needing or asking for such proof.
Bishop Basil of Seleucia comments on this event between Jesus and Thomas. He exhorts those people in the Bishop's time period and place, to do as Thomas did--go out to all the world and cause people who have not seen [who essentially go through life without a mystical experience or very few, or who don't recognize the reality as such if they do experience something super ordinary] to believe based upon their word that it is so, to believe in Christ because of the power of what the witnesses relate is true. "Tell them they are called by grace."
So it is for those of us who have had mystical experiences, be it one, several, or myriad--mystical experiences of one or a variety of types . We are called to go out physically or even such as through the internet (as is this consecrated Catholic hermit's window to the world and mode of sharing with whomever stumbles upon or even seeks my site); We are to draw others to believe in Jesus Christ, in His Real Presence among us, through, with, and in us as we are in Him when we believe in Him. We are to draw others to believe in Jesus through our words, our words of what we know, what we have seen, felt, heard, what we believe--that we believe Jesus Christ is our Lord and Savior.
This is part of the responsibility for those of us who experience the mystical, the mysterium tremendum of God. We are to utilize what we have experienced of the reality of God the Father, Jesus the Son, the Holy Spirit--of angels, saints, heaven, hell, purgatory, of death, of eternal life. We must use words to explain and to share, to cause others to believe in Christ--by the power of our words, our sharing.
Some will listen, some not; some will have the capacity to believe, others not. Yet we are to go out and try. It is a daunting responsibility, especially when in our temporal times, people are all the further from trusting in the numinous, the unseen. Clerics in the Church are yet prone to discouraging mention of the mystical events, the realities of the mystical life or experiences that God destines for some people on earth. Having such mystical experiences is not an easy row to hoe....
Yet another aspect surfaces, regarding why some people have mystical experiences and others do not, or have one or two standout mystical experiences compared to those who have numerous. I consider myself one such person, a mystic who has experienced numerous mystical experiences--some which were witnessed and others not, but all told to my late spiritual father or a priest or two at times when my spiritual father was not available, to help with discernment.
As I look back on my life, and the when and how of the various mystical experiences, a major aspect of God allowing them in my life is now obvious as a means to bolster my faith for what was to come. And what was to come, after some major mystical experiences, were trials and persecutions and great sufferings.
Had it not been for the transverberation of my heart, I'd not have had the courage to follow through with my confirmation. Had it not been for a major spiritual event occurring during my private confirmation, I'd have weakened several times in my life as a Catholic, prior to my private profession of vows as a Catholic hermit in the Consecrated life of the Church. The persecutions became intense and severe, lasting for several years, off and on, involving different groups and individuals, Catholic and non-Catholic, lay persons and priests, in different parishes and locales.
Prior to my conversion, had it not been for locutions foretelling me of events to come, or vivid dreams in which I was shown events and situations, I'd have had a hard time enduring and even surviving, such as in my death experience. Even now, I'd not have come through a painful ordeal had it not been for insights given me during some pain sieges.
So in their own way, for someone weak as I am, weak in faith, the mystical experiences were deemed necessary by His Real Presence, to bolster me for major life sufferings and trials. That in itself is humbling, for it shows that mystical experiences are graces given to people who otherwise are too weak to endure by faith alone. Consider this, please, if you are reading this and still wishing for some super ordinary spiritual event to be visited upon you.
It can seem so powerfully exciting--until one realizes that something heavy-duty is going to come at some unknown time but before long, and that the uplifting and glorious mystical experience will be exacted in every ounce of mystical feeling and mystical memory possibly to be squeezed from the mystical experience. Could I dare say, even a pound of flesh is taken?
I recall one night when St. Joan of Arc appeared to me by the daybed in which I then slept in a rental house--a parish's unused property that I was allowed to rent after some painful, temporal experiences which left me without a place to live. So as a corporeal entity--visible in life-like form, a corpus--Joan of Arc stood by my daybed, around 2 a.m., as I was roused from sleep to witness her there. She did not speak aloud. It was obvious who she was by her temporal appearance, age, garments, hair, sword, and armor.
She gave me two items, though. These she said what they were through inner-thought flashing as means to communicate. She placed five gold, chevron bars on my left shoulder; they were for courage. She placed around my neck--reaching over my head--a delicate gold chain upon which was a round piece of gold, shaped with a simple design, of which she thought-flashed it was an "amulet"--for my protection.
So yes, was it exciting? Of course, having Joan of Arc be there in that upstairs bedroom and give me the gifts--so real as to be touchable yet not touchable in the temporal sense. They are with me yet; these types of mystical adornments are as real if not more so than tangible matter, but they remain invisible to others, or so to most others. There may be some person out there in the world who might be given the ability to see such objects on others, but I'm sure there would have to be some major reason why His Real Presence would deem that necessary. They were and are for me to see and to know from whom they came to be placed upon me, and why: courage and protection.
After she left, I did not fall back asleep for awhile, as my mind was sifting through what all this could mean. Not two weeks later I found out why I'd be given gold bar chevorns for courage and a gold amulet on chain for protection. Mercy! What an ordeal I was called upon to handle, to deal with, to report and be risked in various ways, and to be persecuted later on, yet it was a task from which I could shrink away. It was a crucial task involving the Church, of course, and clerics and lay persons, and much stress and persecution aimed at me would follow. That temporal assignment heralded the beginning to the end of my time in that area,, that diocese, and from the small cadre of loyal friends and my beloved spiritual father.
So there is great suffering that can be exacted from those who are given mystical experiences. At the time of the experience, one can be so uplifted as to not dream of how hard it could become. And that is for a good reason, for would I have followed through with what was asked of me, what was wrung out of me, painfully so, and would lead to my temporal demise, of sorts, from parishes and my homeland?
I have often thought, when someone or other who happened to find out about some mystical experience--mostly, really, the ecstasy during Mass--and became envious that I'd have such an experience: Could you cope with the pain and suffering involved? I think of Jesus asking James and John when they wanted special privileges: Can you drink the Cup of which I must drink?
Considering the mystical experiences--some which were to bolster with courage, strength, protection, faith, and zeal for love of God, and others which were consolations following some tremendous suffering--I realize that it would be difficult for anyone who is married or close to children, or very interactive with others such as in work place or active, corporal works of mercy, active in a parish--to have such mystical experiences.
It can become too other worldly. It can become too treacherous and too painful for those around the mystic with such missions and assignments. It can require packing up and leaving, or living out of one's car for awhile, or having to leave one's hometown, or going without the support of a spiritual director for awhile, or being turned upon by those loved and trusted, or having people being pulled away so that one has to go through some temporal aspects very much alone.
But His Real Presence and one's angel, and various other angels and saints and family and friends on the other side are always with us. But we are not allowed the consolation always of knowing their presence or their help. But always, when the going gets very rough, His Real Presence does reach in--usually in some mystical way that is hidden to others and is between the mystic and His Real Presence. So there again--it is a type of responsibility, for there is no one really to tell and no one who really needs to know, other than it can help to confide in one's spiritual father.
Mostly, the mystical experiences that come as consolations for a job done or suffering endured, are to be kept as treasures within the soul, in the intellect and will and memory, to draw them forth later on as needed, when the suffering, persecutions, sorrows, unknowns, and further assignments require greater faith and hope and love than what one thinks is even possible.
So you see, mystical experiences are not for everyone, and there are reasons why and why not. They seem glorious, and they are truly so in many ways--but yet there is also the reality that they are quite painful and exacting, and are connected with trials, sufferings, and difficult assignments. In this, they can be rather isolating in a temporal sense; yet one is never lonely. That is where these mystical experiences can provide a boost to faith when the going gets rough.
I've had people drop out of my friendship due to the mystical ecstasies during Mass. That's the way the cookie crumbles, as is said. One friend, a male, had the honesty to tell me several years ago that he'd gone through a period of being very envious of me for the mystical state during Mass. He said he'd even prayed, asking God if he could experience it just one time! That's all he asked--just one time! And the man also told me he'd distanced from me as a result of his envy. Oh, I knew that--it all is obvious when someone withdraws friendship, or the glances given, or the silence and coldness.
But the man apologized as he was divulging his feelings and thoughts, after the fact. He said once he started to see how other people were treating me, the hard time priests were giving me, the parishioners' gossip and rumors, and the physical abuse from some--he realized he would never want to have to go through what I was going through simply from a mystical state during Mass.
I'll conclude with this reminder from Bishop Basil of Seleucia. He reminds how great it is to believe due to faith, to believe from the words shared by others, to not have put the finger into the marks of the nails used to secure Jesus to the cross. These people are blessed to have not seen but believe in great faith!
Yet, also are those others, not usually many, who are of the body of Christ--those who for reasons only His Real Presence knows and chooses are like Thomas, shown Christ, shown the super ordinary personages and experiences. These persons, called mystics, are those whose lives and souls are utilized by Him for often painful assignments and missions that He understands and determines will further His Kingdom somehow, somewhere, sometime--now or later, in this world or the other.
But somehow, it does seem, that Jesus as well as Bishop Basil emphasize how blessed and prized are those who live out their lives in blind faith, in faith that defies need for mystical events. Yet we live out what lives we are given, what assignments, what missions, what ordinary or super ordinary graces God deems for each of us.
"This is the army The Lord raises; these are the children of the baptismal font, the works of grace, the fruit of the Spirit. They have followed Christ without having seen him; they sought him and believed. They recognized him with the eyes of faith, not those of the body. They have not put their finger into the mark of the nails but they have bound themselves to his cross and embraced his sufferings. They have not seen the Lord's side but, by grace, they have become members of his body and have made his words their own: 'Happy are those who have not seen and yet believe!'"
No comments:
Post a Comment