I thought to send this to Dr. McGinn, but I realized he does not need to receive the thoughts of someone such as myself. He is a scholar, busy, in retirement yet besieged by correspondence, I'm sure. He is the world leading expert on mysticism and mystics of the Western Christianity; I am but a pained and worn out mystic who views from this personal perspective and experience, and not really from the intellectual so much. But I've decided to share my thoughts here, instead. (And at some point I might switch over to my other blog site that is more particular to mystics and mysticism. This blog for me is the more familiar, though, and it contains more of the thoughts along the spiritual progression.}
Here's what I did not send, but will keep here. Perhaps some of the thoughts can be helpful to someone else. I have no idea on that, of course.
___________________________
(Dear B.,)
I have so been enlightened by your recent lectures posted on YouTube. Today I shared with a longtime friend and clinical psychologist about the three elements but mostly commented on the mystical element needing to be in balance, and that it seems everyone is born with a "spark" of mystical, and some perhaps have a more pronounced purpose, but many likely let the "institutional" and the "intellectual" keep the spark contained; it does not become inflamed nor on fire--such as Jesus said how He wished the world--and I think in some respects each of us all--were already burning. I encouraged the psychologist to broaden the three elements or concepts to whatever breadth, and have fun playing with it. He said he has patients who are so very out of balance; and I said see if somehow these elements, particularly the mystical (love, divinity, spiritual--in his work he has to use variety of terms that otherwise reflect or are God--and see how it goes.
I want to also say that when one of the panel members in one video asked about mystics and mental illness, I had to consider that when I read St. Teresa's writings as well as letters, that never did the thought that she could have mental or psychological issues, for as a mystic, all that is endured including strange collapses and exhaustions, and whatever else that other "normal" people might think are psychotic episodes or mental illness--are simply the path or the way of the mystic. Often God will forewarn, even, with a clue or mystical message in a locution or dream or nudging the mystic in something he or she is reading, or through His Living Word.
So I chuckled a little, although I think mystics themselves have a concern at least when they are at a point in which others or some incident causes them to realize they are on a bit of a little different modality. I know the first person I turned to after a friend said something to me years ago, was to hie thee to a therapist! But after much questioning and also having known me from around the area somewhat--he quickly said no, you are not crazy, but you do have unusual spiritual gifts. However, I have had a handful of people contact me as I remain anonymous but write, and want advice and want to have some type of validation perhaps, and I have hurt some feelings by suggesting they get themselves checked out by a professional. That is especially the case if they start exhibiting what are signals to me, such as not being grounded, or over-zeal for mystical phenomenon. But I also realized that this was not my purpose, to field people wanting to know IF they are mystics in the sense of all that to me seems non-essential. The mystical phenomenon, if we are sparks of mystical, are the nearly invisible little tidbits of burnt that flecks off a sparkler. But it does seem even with the "mystical element"--people immediately or soon think: phenomenon. Or so it seems.
All the mystics I've gotten to know through books of their own writings or more depth biographies by those who knew them well, have spells and illnesses and whatever all else that others who do not have pronounced mystical sparks or otherwise other aspects of their purposes or missions in life are more heavy into institutional and/or intellectual, can kind of lose some of the spark, or hinder it, or maybe, I'm not sure, but it struck me, for what others might wonder if it is mental illness or is this person really a mystic, or is this another goofball or mystic wannabe or hysteric--a mystic can tell for the mystic has had such experiences and even wondered, "Am I losing my mind?" but all the while God is assuring in other ways, no, this is part of the suffering, this is part of the journey of a such a soul.
However, I can assure you that the parish secretary surely thinks I'm a nut-case, and there were some Catholic women in my home town who played Canasta or such, and discussed that I am crazy, so one woman decided to come and see for herself and actually questioned. I gave her much credit! She ended up saying that the others said I was crazy, but that she said, "Well, maybe she thinks WE are the crazy ones!" I assured her that I tend not to think in those terms. Hadn't thought of it. but she could decide, but if she decides I'm not crazy, I doubt she'd easily change others' minds. A Protestant friend reported that she overheard some younger Catholic women at the library discussing my mental soundness, and she said she defended me and thought how horrible they are to say such things! I found humor in it, although I was a bit concerned that the Protestant was not impressed with the Catholics prior to the incident, so not sure how she felt after.
But this is part of the life of a mystic, and that of being shunned or whatever else. The hard parts are the trials that the Lord allows--the sufferings, the odd illnesses, the unexpected and unfortunate events one after another, the mystic's own concerns about what is going on, what is God doing and also where is He? The sense of yearning is so great, yearning for Christ, and the sense of abandonment can be so great, and the demonic assaults, and the experiences that are indeed odd like being taken somewhere in spirit for an assignment. Regardless, what struck me most is that a mystic would never have it come to mind that such as Teresa or any of the mystics had issues with mental illness or psychological problems, for they are part of the mystic's existence.
Some may call the following "depression": mystical bereavement or mystical exhaustion or mystical yearning or the darkest of nights of the soul or the divine silence in which God does not communicate and one never knows if ever will again. If one calls what mystics deal with in that regard, if it is called depression, it is spiritual and "situational" with a mystic. Or so it seems from my standpoint. I had my spiritual da to go to when I questioned if this was insanity or not--but can also call my clinical psychologist friend; and I think a mystic with any sense of decency to God, the Church, family, others and self would do likewise. Time and again, the psychologist says there are not any clinical diagnoses that could be made. Even wanting to DIE--is it suicidal ideologies in a mystic? Or is it desiring so much to be out of this body and begging Jesus to come get me. However, if you say you'd like to die to someone without grasping the mystic mindset, there is trouble to be had.
But, just my take on some of it, from this perspective. This morning I awoke to being reminded of being told early on: "By the power of this locution, your sufferings and the sufferings of Holy Mother Church shall be made ONE!" And then another time about 10 years later, St. Michael in a situation pronounced strongly: "Love to suffer, and suffer to LOVE!" It all can sound crazy and delusional, or too much fixation on suffering. Some must have more purpose and are to have the mystical spark inflamed and to grow, and the institutional and the intellectual sublimated, so the mystical can be set free to burn brightly.
And this is another thought that is a reality: not all mystics leave something visible or tangible as a result of their time on earth, nor are the bulk known. I will pass on with my main function to the Church being suffering and persevering in the suffering, and much of the suffering in some ways is as a result of the institution and the intellectual element, as well, in thinking and perceiving not mystically. Can anyone be a mystic? i think it depends on God's will and purpose for each soul as to the size of the flame or fire. I do think each soul has the Divine spark of the mystical element, if we want to term it that. But some do much good such as a life of scholarly study of mystics and mysticism to leave volumes of invaluable thought and research. Yet, to encourage the mystical element, the institutional and the intellectual elements must be held back some, or in another thought, to have these elements be mystically imbued, yes!
Yet I rather think the mystical element is far broader than these persons whose mystical spark seems stronger at birth or into childhood or beyond, or gets enlivened through much of the world being restricted to them, through some awareness that occurs that shocks or shakes the persons to conversions and deeper conversions. The flame can be enlivened by what is fed to its fire, and more institutional and more intellectual seems counterintuitive and counterproductive for building the mystical element even in the institution and in the intellect, as the mystical element is imbued by the Mystical Element, and that is God and Love, most simply put. Love God and Love (God Is) above all else.
God bless the Mystical Element in us!
No comments:
Post a Comment